Thursdays 12:00pm - 1:00pm (EDT)
EPISODE SUMMARY:
Welcome back to another special episode of The Conscious Consultant Hour! Join us this week as we dive deep into the important topic of healing our core wounds.
In this transformative episode, we’ll dive deep into the profound journey of addressing and healing the core wounds that often originate in our relationships with our parents. Join in as we explore the importance of confronting these foundational emotional traumas, which can significantly impact our well-being, relationships, and our life.
We will discuss practical strategies for recognizing and understanding these deep-seated issues, and how forgiveness and open communication can pave the way for true healing and personal growth.
This episode is a heartfelt invitation to embark on a path of self-discovery and emotional liberation. Whether you're dealing with unresolved conflicts, seeking to improve your relationship with your parents, alive or not, or simply aiming to enhance your inner peace, this conversation provides valuable tools and perspectives to help you heal and thrive.
Tune in to "Healing Our Core Wounds" and learn how to transform pain into a catalyst for positive change, fostering healthier and more fulfilling connections with yourself and those you love.
Tune in and share your own thoughts and feelings about healing our core wounds, on our YouTube livestream or on our Facebook page.
http://www.theconsciousconsultant.com/
Sam starts his show reading an excerpt from a blog he wrote from a couple of years ago. In this blog, Sam reads about traumas and pain as well as our healing process. He talks about ways one can think of this healing to make the process successful by choosing to see it as something we can overcome through a mindset that is positive and at times comical; healing but having fun at the same time rather than purely suffering from our past in order to live a joyful and exuberant life. Sam talks about an example of a true story he had with a friend where they took an uncomfortable feeling and turned it into something funny. Sometimes there's absolutely nothing funny about certain events in life. But there's often a way to refrain from these moments of pure suffering and pain. Loss or pain for example, doesn't have to feel heavy. The way we continue to carry it through the rest of our lives is a choice. It's never easy of course and it's not to escape such feelings, rather we shouldnt suffer forever.
In this segment, Sam defines what is core wound; something that we experience at a very young age that tends to define a lot of our life. He gives an example by talking about himself growing up with his brother who he compared himself to. His brother was an outstanding person who was seen as a genius which affected Sam’s self esteem. He also mentioned his sister, who was someone he described as a “favorite child”. Comparing your children is something that can affect each child in a different way as it tends to be very obvious even to them. It can be challenging to heal those wounds that were caused by other people. It affects our decision making and what we think of life, our experiences and ourselves. In Sam’s situation, it made him feel not worthy and unlovable to where he put other people's needs first and himself last, mentally, physically, and emotionally. Sam talks about making poor choices throughout his life because of this which meant that he was not being present in what’s important to him. He may still deal with this from time to time as it's a core wound no matter what, but he is more conscious about his reaction to it.
Sam discusses the retreat he went on recently where he decided to speak about his last interactions with his parents before they each passed away. He talks about the last conversation he had with father a few months before his passing. It wasnt exactly the way he wanted it to be. But it was something he had to heal from. As for his mother, she lived to be 99 years old. Almost ten years before her passing, she moved into an assistance facility in Israel. During this time he went to a ceremony with them and was able to see them as not parents but human beings who were doing the best they could given their own experiences, good and bad. At this moment, he apologized to his mother for the suffering he caused her. He was happy with this last interaction. Even if we don't get the chance to say goodbye, Sam says it's not about the other person hearing what we have to say but more about us being able to say things and allowing ourselves to express things out loud in different ways; allowing ourselves to dig into this process of healing our core wounds. It's not a good feeling and it can be uncomfortable. “The only way to heal it is to feel it.”
Sam speaks more about his core wound from his mother. He remembers the story he created in his mind based on his mothers behavior that money was more important to her than him. When he got older, he ended up doing things that would cost her money, meaning if she spent a lot of money on him considering how much she cared about money, it was him proving that she loved him. Though, he grew out of that and he healed his relationship with her. When he saw her as a human being and not as a mother, he saw someone who had to raise three kids and was trying to make ends meet. There are two ways to interpret it: money was more important to her than he was, or she was being very conscious about her decisions so that she could give as much as she could to them. Interestingly, sometimes our biggest wounds can come from the stories we make up in our heads around an incident as opposed to the incident itself.
00:00:39.090 --> 00:00:53.389 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Good afternoon, my conscious co-creators. Welcome to another edition of the conscious consultant hour awakening humanity. I am very, very pleased that you are all here with me today.
00:00:54.330 --> 00:01:13.959 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I I hope you enjoy a little bit of a break that we had last couple of weeks. Well, last week we we had a show, but you know, earlier this month we had a break for 4th of July, and so you didn't get the the me only show. And so today we're doing a Me only show.
00:01:13.990 --> 00:01:28.660 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So just you and me. Please be active in the comments section of the live streams. Let me know what you're thinking about. Let me know how you feel about the stuff I talk about today. We'll incorporate that into the show, I promise you. Alright. So.
00:01:28.940 --> 00:01:34.869 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: of course, as always, I'm starting off with a blog post from a couple of years ago.
00:01:35.040 --> 00:01:38.949 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It's kind of funny like I could have written this like couple of weeks ago.
00:01:39.240 --> 00:01:43.070 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But today's blog post is entitled.
00:01:43.760 --> 00:01:46.640 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: when we can laugh at our pain.
00:01:47.280 --> 00:01:49.979 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: we find new freedom.
00:01:51.280 --> 00:01:55.729 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: There are so many aspects of life we take seriously
00:01:56.410 --> 00:02:02.630 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: pain, death and suffering are very somber experiences.
00:02:03.180 --> 00:02:08.099 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Usually we feel there is no way to make things feel better.
00:02:08.660 --> 00:02:11.449 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Yeah, we actually do have a choice.
00:02:12.500 --> 00:02:17.279 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: How we approach these situations can make all the difference in the world.
00:02:18.570 --> 00:02:20.070 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Sometimes.
00:02:20.300 --> 00:02:23.449 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: when we are engaged with healing work.
00:02:23.550 --> 00:02:27.729 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: our traumas and our pain come to the surface.
00:02:28.420 --> 00:02:34.210 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So we think our healing process has to be something difficult and sober.
00:02:35.060 --> 00:02:38.520 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: We think there is no other way to approach it.
00:02:39.450 --> 00:02:42.499 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Yet if we bring a sense of humor.
00:02:42.710 --> 00:02:45.810 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: fun, and play to it.
00:02:46.040 --> 00:02:50.529 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: we can make the healing process so much easier for ourselves.
00:02:52.720 --> 00:02:57.730 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Yes, it can be challenging to see a pain painful experience
00:02:57.740 --> 00:02:59.770 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: through the lens of levity.
00:03:00.330 --> 00:03:03.019 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and when we are able to joke about it.
00:03:03.070 --> 00:03:04.470 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: laugh at it.
00:03:04.870 --> 00:03:06.880 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: tease ourselves about it.
00:03:07.150 --> 00:03:12.139 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: we take the power away from it, being able to hurt us again.
00:03:12.830 --> 00:03:16.139 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: We cannot change what happened in the past.
00:03:17.060 --> 00:03:21.689 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and we can say, it is true that we felt.
00:03:22.380 --> 00:03:23.720 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and we can see.
00:03:23.900 --> 00:03:26.490 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: it is true, what we felt at the time
00:03:27.090 --> 00:03:32.999 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: to continue to feel that pain in a painful way is a choice.
00:03:33.980 --> 00:03:35.879 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: we can make a different choice.
00:03:36.520 --> 00:03:41.049 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and we can choose to see it as something comical or slapstick.
00:03:41.600 --> 00:03:46.690 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: To laugh at. Our own pain is sometimes the best medicine.
00:03:47.580 --> 00:03:50.979 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Like seeing a chameleon slip on a banana peel.
00:03:52.070 --> 00:03:56.990 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: it helps the pain and trauma to lighten its grip on our presence.
00:03:58.000 --> 00:04:02.689 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and allows us to experience healing and have fun at the same time.
00:04:03.450 --> 00:04:12.559 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: There is no rule or universal law that says, we have to continue to suffer and to be serious about our pain.
00:04:13.820 --> 00:04:17.230 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: We can make up stories about what happened
00:04:17.250 --> 00:04:20.299 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: to inject humor into the situation
00:04:20.930 --> 00:04:24.879 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: or change our existing stories to make them funnier.
00:04:25.760 --> 00:04:27.579 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: for ultimately
00:04:27.730 --> 00:04:31.740 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: it is not about what we experienced in the past.
00:04:32.400 --> 00:04:37.749 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It is about what we want to experience right here and right now.
00:04:39.900 --> 00:04:42.239 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: do we want to keep crying.
00:04:42.340 --> 00:04:44.560 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: or do we want to start laughing?
00:04:45.370 --> 00:04:48.830 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: This is a question we can always ask ourselves
00:04:49.550 --> 00:04:53.420 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: when we find we are wallowing in our misery
00:04:54.260 --> 00:04:55.839 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: to remind us
00:04:56.790 --> 00:05:00.019 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that we have a fundamental choice.
00:05:00.930 --> 00:05:06.520 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: We can continue to allow the pain from our past to have a hold over us.
00:05:07.790 --> 00:05:14.850 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: or we decide that we have suffered enough, and it is time to start enjoying life more.
00:05:16.740 --> 00:05:20.699 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: for if we can learn to laugh at our pain and suffering.
00:05:21.600 --> 00:05:24.489 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: then we can truly live a joyful life.
00:05:25.100 --> 00:05:27.269 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: a joyful and exuberant light.
00:05:28.100 --> 00:05:30.089 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: maybe not all at once.
00:05:30.780 --> 00:05:34.099 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Yet if we can do it even a little.
00:05:34.300 --> 00:05:37.310 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: we have made a great breakthrough.
00:05:39.020 --> 00:05:43.229 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So where can you learn to laugh at the pain in your past?
00:05:44.060 --> 00:05:51.950 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Is there even one small pain or trauma that you can practice honestly laughing at it.
00:05:54.280 --> 00:05:55.210 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So
00:05:56.460 --> 00:05:57.210 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: go!
00:05:58.050 --> 00:06:00.780 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Wish I could remember exactly
00:06:00.980 --> 00:06:07.370 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: what motivated me to write this. I have a sneaking suspicion. It's about
00:06:07.862 --> 00:06:11.640 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: an experience. I had. My wife and I
00:06:12.430 --> 00:06:16.209 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: had had a little journey with with a close friend.
00:06:16.700 --> 00:06:18.820 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and we were trying something new.
00:06:19.560 --> 00:06:22.180 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and our friend in the
00:06:22.760 --> 00:06:28.040 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and and and sort of in the beginning, we're being quiet, kind of dropping into the experience.
00:06:28.230 --> 00:06:30.509 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And I started getting up in my head
00:06:31.190 --> 00:06:33.660 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and criticizing myself and
00:06:33.710 --> 00:06:35.909 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: being down on myself and
00:06:36.340 --> 00:06:37.759 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: kind of suffering a bit.
00:06:39.190 --> 00:06:41.429 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and then our friend, who was with us.
00:06:42.030 --> 00:06:49.019 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and and we didn't know it at the time. But he started having these really uncomfortable feelings himself.
00:06:49.540 --> 00:06:52.860 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and he started getting really anxious.
00:06:53.570 --> 00:06:56.419 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But what he did was, and it was beautiful.
00:06:56.780 --> 00:06:58.129 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: As he got up.
00:06:58.270 --> 00:07:05.329 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and he started acting like a crazy person, and it was hysterical.
00:07:05.440 --> 00:07:12.740 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: We were in stitches, for, like 3 or 4 h we started laughing together so
00:07:13.190 --> 00:07:14.680 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: so hard.
00:07:16.710 --> 00:07:22.169 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and and I have a feeling. This all came out of that experience where
00:07:24.260 --> 00:07:28.299 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: my wife and I talked about it afterwards, and how.
00:07:28.880 --> 00:07:35.039 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: especially when he related to us that he was going through his own difficulty.
00:07:35.400 --> 00:07:53.280 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and and he was just too anxious to stay with it. And so he just started coming up with this stuff. And and you know, if if I tell you the stuff he did, you probably think, what are you talking about? That's not funny. But to us at the time. It was hysterical, and it would. It broke the energy
00:07:54.060 --> 00:07:55.540 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: of the moment.
00:07:55.760 --> 00:08:04.620 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And and instead of me being down on myself, instead of him being all anxious. We were laughing and laughing and laughing to the point that my sides hurt.
00:08:06.820 --> 00:08:12.269 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and and so, when me and my wife talked about it afterwards. It was really a big lesson for me
00:08:12.770 --> 00:08:13.750 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that
00:08:15.010 --> 00:08:18.510 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: you know. We take our pain very seriously
00:08:19.110 --> 00:08:21.620 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: because it hurts. It's uncomfortable.
00:08:23.690 --> 00:08:28.409 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And so we we tend to stick with that uncomfortableness.
00:08:31.820 --> 00:08:34.020 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: instead of really
00:08:34.500 --> 00:08:38.449 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: taking it as an opportunity to reframe
00:08:38.890 --> 00:08:41.570 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: the pain into something funny.
00:08:45.060 --> 00:08:50.429 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And sometimes it's a stretch, and sometimes there's absolutely nothing funny about it at all.
00:08:50.660 --> 00:08:56.570 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Like when something tragic happens to a child, it's really hard to find something funny about that.
00:08:57.610 --> 00:09:02.679 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But when it's something happening to us, or something in our own life or own childhood.
00:09:06.480 --> 00:09:11.720 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: There's often a way to try and get in there and reframe it.
00:09:13.780 --> 00:09:17.780 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and and the reason why I say, like I could have written this recently
00:09:17.970 --> 00:09:22.239 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: was was because my wife and I saw this amazing show.
00:09:22.320 --> 00:09:29.080 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: a musical show at at Lincoln Center a few weeks ago, called the Keep Going Song.
00:09:29.650 --> 00:09:32.619 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And it was this couple of musicians.
00:09:33.560 --> 00:09:34.740 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and
00:09:35.000 --> 00:09:37.920 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: they they started off, the woman
00:09:38.330 --> 00:09:39.780 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: talking about
00:09:40.080 --> 00:09:45.340 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: how the night they got called up and asked if they wanted to do a performance at Lincoln Center
00:09:45.520 --> 00:09:47.350 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: was the night her brother died.
00:09:50.610 --> 00:09:51.980 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and
00:09:52.520 --> 00:09:57.079 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: she started telling stories about her brother. They started singing about it.
00:09:57.580 --> 00:10:00.990 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and the whole night. In a way
00:10:02.170 --> 00:10:06.760 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: it wasn't just about dead, but it was about loss and grief.
00:10:07.860 --> 00:10:13.370 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: but the way they made the songs about it, the way they talked about it, it lightened up
00:10:13.440 --> 00:10:15.860 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: everything around the grief.
00:10:17.340 --> 00:10:19.740 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: so I guess it was a reminder
00:10:21.690 --> 00:10:25.279 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that loss doesn't have to feel heavy.
00:10:25.350 --> 00:10:28.819 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that pain doesn't have to feel heavy.
00:10:29.080 --> 00:10:34.210 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: better trials and tribulations that at the moment we're going through them.
00:10:34.840 --> 00:10:35.650 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Oh.
00:10:35.790 --> 00:10:38.809 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: we, we feel, are the most god awful things.
00:10:40.360 --> 00:10:43.210 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But you know, once we've gotten through it.
00:10:46.220 --> 00:10:51.110 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: the way we continue to carry it through to the rest of our lives.
00:10:52.200 --> 00:10:53.700 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: That is a choice.
00:10:54.060 --> 00:10:57.260 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And that's what this whole experience really
00:10:57.500 --> 00:10:59.380 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: highlighted for me
00:11:01.250 --> 00:11:08.219 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: is that how we choose to feel about the things we've been through in life is ultimately a choice.
00:11:10.100 --> 00:11:13.830 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: We can choose to see the absurdity in it.
00:11:15.660 --> 00:11:21.040 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Now look, W. When the pain is too close. I'm not saying, this is easy, and I'm not saying
00:11:22.020 --> 00:11:29.959 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that we should bypass the pain. I'm not saying that we should, you know, use this as a way to escape and not feel uncomfortable feelings.
00:11:31.740 --> 00:11:33.490 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But what I'm saying is.
00:11:35.870 --> 00:11:40.199 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: we don't have to keep suffering and suffering and suffering
00:11:41.180 --> 00:11:43.739 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: for years and decades
00:11:43.920 --> 00:11:45.310 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: after what happened
00:11:48.940 --> 00:11:49.630 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and
00:11:52.330 --> 00:11:54.250 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: given that today's
00:11:54.893 --> 00:11:58.279 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: show is all about healing our core wounds.
00:11:59.159 --> 00:12:03.019 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Perhaps I'll be able to tell some stories that
00:12:03.310 --> 00:12:05.829 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: at the time, and when I went through them
00:12:06.260 --> 00:12:11.559 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: they weren't so funny. But now maybe I can find a way to find some humor and then laugh at them.
00:12:13.090 --> 00:12:14.820 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So I'm just curious
00:12:14.990 --> 00:12:20.459 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: for all you out there listening, whether on Facebook or Youtube or Linkedin.
00:12:21.810 --> 00:12:22.869 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Oh, Twitch!
00:12:24.980 --> 00:12:29.149 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Do you have some pain that you've been carrying around with you
00:12:30.400 --> 00:12:33.930 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that the actual incident is long over.
00:12:34.730 --> 00:12:39.590 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But you're still carrying the grief you're still carrying the sorrow you're still carrying
00:12:39.880 --> 00:12:43.050 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: anger and the sadness around it with you
00:12:45.790 --> 00:12:50.439 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that maybe you can find a way to tell the story.
00:12:50.730 --> 00:12:52.429 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: to make it humorous.
00:12:52.740 --> 00:12:57.620 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: to make it funny, to make it even more absurd than it was.
00:12:58.330 --> 00:13:00.080 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: so that you can laugh at it.
00:13:00.340 --> 00:13:03.970 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And this is a great exercise to do with friends.
00:13:04.930 --> 00:13:08.320 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: you know, to call up a story from our past
00:13:08.770 --> 00:13:11.119 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and retell it to our friend.
00:13:11.450 --> 00:13:17.019 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Tell it in a way that makes it just so ridiculous. You can't help
00:13:17.110 --> 00:13:18.530 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: but laugh at it.
00:13:20.240 --> 00:13:22.770 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: They're like, I'm not saying you can do this with everything.
00:13:23.030 --> 00:13:31.209 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And, as I said before, if something's very close, it's it's more difficult to do it the more distance there is the easier it is to do this.
00:13:34.200 --> 00:13:38.000 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: but even just practicing it on some little thing
00:13:38.540 --> 00:13:41.889 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: on some little painful moment.
00:13:42.250 --> 00:13:46.670 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And actually a lot of stand-up comedians is exactly what they do.
00:13:47.900 --> 00:13:49.350 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: They? They
00:13:49.410 --> 00:13:51.489 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: call out the the
00:13:51.740 --> 00:13:59.609 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: raziness of society in a way that makes us just laugh at it, even though it's like, Oh, my God, how can this be true?
00:14:00.960 --> 00:14:06.269 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So it's kind of like learning to be a stand up comedian about our own life.
00:14:08.360 --> 00:14:11.887 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: A a great example of this I was. I was
00:14:12.600 --> 00:14:14.925 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: watching that that long ago.
00:14:16.740 --> 00:14:22.959 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: the the the story about weird Al Yankovic, the the movie with Daniel Radcliffe in it.
00:14:23.730 --> 00:14:24.750 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and
00:14:25.160 --> 00:14:33.590 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: you know his life is just one absurdity after another, and even though there's some really painful moments in it.
00:14:33.980 --> 00:14:34.860 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: the
00:14:35.100 --> 00:14:42.719 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: you just can't help but laugh through most of the movie, even though there's some really like you could tell painful.
00:14:43.090 --> 00:14:46.680 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: hard moments for him, for for the weird Al and it.
00:14:48.872 --> 00:14:52.859 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Now, Weird Al is not everyone's cup of tea, I know.
00:14:53.750 --> 00:14:58.319 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: but but the movie about him was actually pretty well done
00:14:58.900 --> 00:15:03.130 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and and pretty funny. Maybe not the whole movie, but a lot of the movies.
00:15:03.740 --> 00:15:05.669 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So it's a great example
00:15:06.560 --> 00:15:16.089 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: of how to take our pain. I think that's what weird Al Yankovic did with his whole act and routine over the years is he took his pain.
00:15:16.590 --> 00:15:18.929 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and he turned it into something funny.
00:15:19.590 --> 00:15:24.109 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And and and that lifts everybody's spirit, not just our own.
00:15:28.140 --> 00:15:29.290 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So
00:15:30.590 --> 00:15:34.129 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I would love to hear from you. I would love to hear
00:15:35.060 --> 00:15:38.839 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: what kinds of painful moments you can take
00:15:39.280 --> 00:15:41.310 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and make a funny story around
00:15:42.330 --> 00:15:43.180 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: what
00:15:43.910 --> 00:15:44.800 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: you know.
00:15:45.180 --> 00:15:47.709 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Tragic moments in your life
00:15:48.950 --> 00:15:51.629 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: can you see in a different way.
00:15:54.520 --> 00:15:57.669 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: so that maybe you can't laugh at it.
00:15:58.670 --> 00:16:00.869 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But maybe you can make fun of it.
00:16:01.400 --> 00:16:04.679 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Maybe you can point to the absurdity around it.
00:16:06.760 --> 00:16:07.839 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: so that
00:16:08.110 --> 00:16:10.850 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: carrying it is not so heavy
00:16:12.440 --> 00:16:14.879 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and living with it is not
00:16:15.300 --> 00:16:17.599 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: the end of the world for us.
00:16:19.080 --> 00:16:19.850 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So
00:16:19.990 --> 00:16:22.250 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that's my blog post.
00:16:22.960 --> 00:16:27.570 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: When we laugh at our pain we find new freedom.
00:16:28.190 --> 00:16:42.770 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So let me know what pain you can laugh at, and of course you can always find my blog post. @Talkradio.nyc slash blog, or on my personally branded website, the conscious consultant.com.
00:16:43.610 --> 00:16:54.299 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And yeah. So when we come back, no guests today, nobody introduced. It's just gonna be you and me. And I'm gonna be talking about something that came up this past
00:16:54.450 --> 00:17:00.489 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: weekend or inspired by what happened this past weekend, talking about healing our core rule
00:17:01.360 --> 00:17:02.490 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and
00:17:03.840 --> 00:17:05.470 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: learning how.
00:17:06.150 --> 00:17:10.199 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: when we really dive into it with an open heart
00:17:10.760 --> 00:17:12.399 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and with compassion.
00:17:12.940 --> 00:17:18.200 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that there's a way to heal even the most painful wounds in our life.
00:17:18.710 --> 00:17:20.790 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: so I hope you'll stick around for it.
00:17:22.119 --> 00:17:42.220 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Thank you. You are listening to the conscious consultant, our awakening humanity. We do this every Thursday except on holidays, 12 noon to one pm, eastern time, right here on talk radio data, Nyc, and all over social media, Youtube, Facebook, Linkedin Twitch.
00:17:42.551 --> 00:17:48.190 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: We'll get back on Twitter. We're not on Twitter at the moment. I don't know. Twitter, change something, exchange something.
00:17:48.330 --> 00:17:50.599 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: We gotta Update settings so.
00:17:50.620 --> 00:17:55.079 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and we will be right back with the rest of the show in just a moment.
00:20:11.420 --> 00:20:26.849 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And welcome back to the conscious, consulting hour. Awakening humanity today is one of those shows. It's just me no guests. So it's me and you so please share your comments. Post to the live stream. Let me know
00:20:27.627 --> 00:20:33.050 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: how you feel about what we talk about today, which is about healing our core wounds.
00:20:34.740 --> 00:20:40.329 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So this is one of those episodes where I guess I need to get really vulnerable with everyone.
00:20:43.290 --> 00:20:49.449 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: to give you the example of of what I mean by healing core wounds. What is a core wound?
00:20:52.270 --> 00:20:59.490 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Well, the majority of the time. A core wound is something that we experienced at a very young age
00:20:59.860 --> 00:21:03.330 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that tends to define a lot of our life.
00:21:04.860 --> 00:21:07.839 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Sometimes we're aware of them, sometimes we're not.
00:21:09.100 --> 00:21:11.929 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And there are different levels of core wounds.
00:21:12.090 --> 00:21:13.869 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: You know, there's some that are
00:21:14.120 --> 00:21:21.230 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: are more really at the deep deepest part of ourselves and others that might be a little more superficial.
00:21:23.410 --> 00:21:25.490 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So, as an example.
00:21:26.520 --> 00:21:28.580 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: one of my core wounds
00:21:29.950 --> 00:21:32.940 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: was always being compared to my brother and sister.
00:21:33.910 --> 00:21:36.610 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: my older brother. He was 8 years older than me.
00:21:37.120 --> 00:21:52.629 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: He was the genius of the family. He skipped to grades. He skipped a grade elementary school and a junior high school. I think he graduated high school at 16 he was always a a plus student. He was captain of the chess team.
00:21:53.082 --> 00:21:57.210 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: He went on. In graduate school. He made the papers
00:21:57.250 --> 00:21:58.630 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: by playing
00:21:59.220 --> 00:22:05.409 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: 12 ranked chess players simultaneously, without looking at the boards.
00:22:05.450 --> 00:22:07.800 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: He won 10 games.
00:22:07.990 --> 00:22:13.700 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: He tied one game and he lost one game, and he said he only lost the one game because
00:22:14.140 --> 00:22:17.839 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: he lost track of one pawn. I mean, the man is
00:22:18.100 --> 00:22:19.030 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: brilliant.
00:22:20.480 --> 00:22:26.729 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: so kind of growing up with an older brother like that not do wonders for your self esteem.
00:22:28.830 --> 00:22:33.050 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And then there was my sister. There is my sister, who's 4 years older than me.
00:22:34.210 --> 00:22:36.090 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: who I love dearly, and
00:22:36.170 --> 00:22:37.790 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and we're very close.
00:22:38.370 --> 00:22:44.009 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But it was quite obvious when we were kids that she was Mom's favorite. My mom always
00:22:44.150 --> 00:22:46.910 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: always loved girls more than boys.
00:22:47.650 --> 00:22:51.480 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So there was a lot of jealousy there, a lot of fighting.
00:22:54.430 --> 00:22:55.580 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and
00:22:55.800 --> 00:22:59.340 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: you know, when you're a child you can kind of feel it
00:22:59.770 --> 00:23:01.490 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: even when it's not
00:23:02.280 --> 00:23:03.360 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: overt.
00:23:04.300 --> 00:23:12.660 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: You can feel when a parent likes another sibling more than you you can feel when you're being compared to others.
00:23:12.740 --> 00:23:18.280 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I mean, it's usually pretty over. But it's it's fairly obvious.
00:23:20.000 --> 00:23:21.960 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So when that happens.
00:23:24.230 --> 00:23:27.389 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: it does create a wound of sorts.
00:23:28.340 --> 00:23:32.619 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It does cause us to see ourselves as less than.
00:23:35.120 --> 00:23:39.169 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and I've carried that wound through my life.
00:23:40.325 --> 00:23:41.629 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Quite a bit.
00:23:42.520 --> 00:23:48.829 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and it caused me to make some ridiculous choices and decisions, and not valuing myself.
00:23:51.990 --> 00:23:54.680 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and and that causes a lot of pain.
00:24:01.430 --> 00:24:07.810 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And because our wounds, our core wounds, are often caused by other people.
00:24:10.330 --> 00:24:13.789 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: it can be challenging to heal those wounds.
00:24:14.170 --> 00:24:18.839 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: because it's quote unquote about what the other person did to us.
00:24:23.170 --> 00:24:26.710 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And the truth is, it's not actually what they did to us.
00:24:28.140 --> 00:24:34.599 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I mean, unless it's something like physical abuse then. Yes, absolutely sexual abuse, absolutely
00:24:35.470 --> 00:24:38.369 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: verbal, emotional abuse, absolutely.
00:24:41.130 --> 00:24:45.199 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But lots of times it's about how we interpret
00:24:45.640 --> 00:24:47.239 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: what they did to us.
00:24:48.100 --> 00:24:53.450 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It's about the story we create around what we experience.
00:24:56.140 --> 00:25:01.579 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So what was the story I created around being compared to my brother and sister throughout childhood?
00:25:03.220 --> 00:25:07.510 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Not good enough, not lovable, not worthy
00:25:11.480 --> 00:25:12.055 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that.
00:25:15.150 --> 00:25:16.010 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: yeah.
00:25:16.750 --> 00:25:18.060 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: just not
00:25:18.520 --> 00:25:21.589 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: worthy of having the good things in life.
00:25:24.310 --> 00:25:29.420 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And so I made a lot of choices, and I did a lot of things through my life where
00:25:30.010 --> 00:25:31.730 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I put myself last.
00:25:32.770 --> 00:25:34.859 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I put my own needs
00:25:34.980 --> 00:25:37.200 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: behind everyone else's.
00:25:38.670 --> 00:25:44.310 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: where I didn't really take care of myself, emotionally, physically.
00:25:44.630 --> 00:25:45.780 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: mentally.
00:25:48.980 --> 00:25:51.300 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: until I was really able to
00:25:52.040 --> 00:25:54.000 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: see what was going on.
00:25:54.260 --> 00:25:56.299 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And it's an interesting thing
00:25:56.950 --> 00:25:58.630 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: what we start doing.
00:25:58.700 --> 00:26:00.429 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: or deep healing work
00:26:00.810 --> 00:26:04.019 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that when we really start to look at.
00:26:04.330 --> 00:26:06.620 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: why am I the way I am?
00:26:06.980 --> 00:26:09.379 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Why do I feel the way I do?
00:26:09.480 --> 00:26:11.749 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: What can I do to change that.
00:26:14.730 --> 00:26:16.139 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: That's so
00:26:16.430 --> 00:26:17.210 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: much
00:26:17.810 --> 00:26:19.479 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: of our wounding
00:26:20.260 --> 00:26:21.710 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: causes.
00:26:22.670 --> 00:26:24.920 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: this lack of self-worth.
00:26:25.860 --> 00:26:31.390 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: this feeling of unworthiness, of not being good enough of not being lovable.
00:26:33.650 --> 00:26:40.120 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Now it's quite interesting. Different people respond to not feeling, being lovable, different ways
00:26:42.410 --> 00:26:44.079 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: for me. I was the rebel
00:26:45.290 --> 00:26:46.640 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I checked out.
00:26:47.060 --> 00:26:51.130 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Not only was I not an A student. I was a B student.
00:26:51.510 --> 00:26:57.570 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and and when I made it to high school I started smoke a pod doing drugs.
00:26:57.920 --> 00:27:02.619 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: You know. i i i did all the things my brother and sister didn't do.
00:27:03.340 --> 00:27:17.739 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and and I just rebelled against. I'm like, Okay, well, you you're gonna put me in that kind of box you're gonna you're you're gonna not value me. Then you know what I'm not. Gonna listen to what you say.
00:27:20.340 --> 00:27:21.170 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And
00:27:22.210 --> 00:27:28.060 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: you know, it's part of my personality. Of course, being the youngest. The youngest is usually the rebel
00:27:29.734 --> 00:27:32.560 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: you know. If they say a birth order then.
00:27:33.300 --> 00:27:38.910 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and I've read a book about birth order. Oh, my God! It must have been like 40 years ago.
00:27:39.250 --> 00:27:40.200 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and
00:27:40.470 --> 00:27:45.219 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: there actually is a lot. So if you have siblings.
00:27:45.750 --> 00:27:53.619 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I would look for a book around birth order, and I can't remember which one it was. But there are several books on it.
00:27:55.250 --> 00:27:57.139 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: you know, about you know
00:27:57.160 --> 00:28:02.739 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: what happens when you're the youngest child. What happens when you're the middle child? What happens when you're the eldest child?
00:28:04.354 --> 00:28:11.589 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It's it's really very valuable and very insightful, so I highly recommend checking it out and getting some information on that.
00:28:12.580 --> 00:28:15.009 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But me being the youngest, I was the rebel.
00:28:16.600 --> 00:28:20.399 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and I was like you're gonna give me a hard time. I'm gonna do the opposite.
00:28:20.430 --> 00:28:22.810 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Tell me to do X. I'm gonna do y?
00:28:25.940 --> 00:28:34.700 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So since I was always being compared to them. My brother and sister and I could never live up to that standard because it just wasn't me.
00:28:34.760 --> 00:28:41.849 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I went the complete opposite direction. I'm gonna be the black sheep of the family, and I'm gonna do what? What?
00:28:42.410 --> 00:28:43.385 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Whatever?
00:28:45.010 --> 00:28:49.650 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: you know my parents tell me not to do. I'm gonna do whatever society says not to do.
00:28:49.710 --> 00:28:52.099 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and I just went in the opposite direction.
00:28:53.290 --> 00:28:57.249 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: which is also not good, because then you make some really poor choices.
00:28:58.890 --> 00:29:06.380 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: because then you're not doing something because you want to do it. You're doing something to do the opposite of what other people want you to do.
00:29:08.840 --> 00:29:16.859 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: so that can kinda get silly. I I hope you can see that. I hope you can relate to this that when we do something
00:29:17.540 --> 00:29:19.449 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: out of a desire
00:29:20.540 --> 00:29:23.449 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: to do the opposite of what someone says.
00:29:23.810 --> 00:29:27.539 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: We're not truly honoring ourselves. We're just being reactive.
00:29:27.550 --> 00:29:33.259 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: We're just reacting to a situation saying, No, I'm not going to do that. I'm going to do something else.
00:29:33.420 --> 00:29:39.609 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And we're not really thinking we're not being present about what's really good for us.
00:29:42.320 --> 00:29:49.379 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And that's why a lot of teenagers get into so much trouble, and that's why a lot of teenagers
00:29:49.490 --> 00:29:50.939 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: end up doing so
00:29:50.960 --> 00:29:53.940 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: stupid things that can hurt themselves.
00:29:55.150 --> 00:29:57.540 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But sometimes they can die from.
00:29:59.850 --> 00:30:05.589 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: because they're not truly looking at what they want, what their heart desires.
00:30:07.420 --> 00:30:11.059 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: They're looking just to do something different than what their parents say.
00:30:12.630 --> 00:30:19.200 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Now, sometimes, you know, all they are is just in so much pain, and they just don't know how to deal with it.
00:30:22.100 --> 00:30:24.370 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But when we're that much pain.
00:30:25.800 --> 00:30:31.129 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: what we really need to do is reach out for help and not just push it away and not just
00:30:31.450 --> 00:30:37.569 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: numb ourselves to it, which is what I did as a teenager. What a lot of teenagers do
00:30:41.800 --> 00:30:43.350 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: so that core will
00:30:44.240 --> 00:30:45.870 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: of being compared
00:30:46.150 --> 00:30:49.110 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: to a brother and sister who I was not.
00:30:50.390 --> 00:30:51.539 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: That's a core rule.
00:30:53.320 --> 00:31:02.929 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Do I still deal with the fallout from that? Yeah, I'm sure I absolutely do. Am I much more conscious of it than I've been in the past absolutely.
00:31:04.260 --> 00:31:08.470 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Do I still compare myself to others? Yeah, I probably do.
00:31:09.050 --> 00:31:18.369 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: because I was just a habit, because I was compared to other people. Do I do it a lot less, and I'm a lot more selective about who I compare myself to. Yes, absolutely
00:31:21.980 --> 00:31:22.930 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: so.
00:31:25.940 --> 00:31:29.870 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: As we go through life, and we become more aware of our poor wounds.
00:31:32.370 --> 00:31:36.290 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: We do raise our consciousness, and we do learn to
00:31:36.410 --> 00:31:41.089 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: not always react to them. The same way that we've reacted to them
00:31:41.820 --> 00:31:43.070 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: as children.
00:31:43.460 --> 00:31:46.050 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: but that doesn't mean they still don't live where they does.
00:31:46.510 --> 00:31:48.439 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: They still don't define us.
00:31:50.150 --> 00:31:52.250 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Is that a bad thing? I don't know.
00:31:53.250 --> 00:31:56.150 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Maybe that's what makes us who we are today.
00:31:58.720 --> 00:31:59.470 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So
00:31:59.925 --> 00:32:03.500 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: sign for this. Take a break. When we come back I'll I'll I'll
00:32:03.620 --> 00:32:08.500 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: kind of talk about why this topic came up for this week.
00:32:09.900 --> 00:32:13.850 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and share a couple of more core wounds.
00:32:14.470 --> 00:32:15.730 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and
00:32:16.590 --> 00:32:18.500 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I would love to hear yours.
00:32:18.590 --> 00:32:21.839 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I'd love to hear what's your experience with your core world?
00:32:22.880 --> 00:32:25.620 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And if you need any support with it
00:32:26.460 --> 00:32:27.949 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: posted in the comments.
00:32:28.130 --> 00:32:29.430 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: say, Hey, Sam.
00:32:29.500 --> 00:32:32.780 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I'm dealing with this core wound, and I just don't know what to do.
00:32:33.410 --> 00:32:35.600 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I'll be more than happy to
00:32:35.870 --> 00:32:37.620 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: share my perspective on.
00:32:38.050 --> 00:32:49.900 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So you're listening to the conscious consultant hour awakening humanity. No guest today. It's just me and you. So please chime in on the on the live streams, and we will be right back
00:32:50.130 --> 00:32:51.510 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: just a moment
00:32:51.660 --> 00:32:54.990 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: to talk more about healing our core wounds.
00:35:01.160 --> 00:35:02.600 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And welcome back.
00:35:03.990 --> 00:35:08.509 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So I wanted to touch into, and I'll touch in kind of
00:35:08.560 --> 00:35:12.170 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: why this topic happened to come up this week.
00:35:12.870 --> 00:35:13.955 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: because
00:35:15.750 --> 00:35:18.990 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: you know, I was trying to think about what to talk about.
00:35:19.280 --> 00:35:27.039 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and and my wife and I just held a retreat this past weekend in the Hamptons, which was wonderful. Wonderful.
00:35:27.290 --> 00:35:28.140 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: A.
00:35:29.350 --> 00:35:30.710 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And and
00:35:31.410 --> 00:35:36.249 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: something really interesting happened this weekend. That was really the 1st time which was
00:35:36.380 --> 00:35:46.040 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: normally, when we do a a retreat or ceremony. i i i talk a little bit in the beginning just to try and bring the energy together of the group.
00:35:47.840 --> 00:35:48.760 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and
00:35:49.500 --> 00:35:55.440 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: the night before we. We went out to the Hamptons the night before, and I had a hard time sleeping.
00:35:55.920 --> 00:35:59.790 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and it just kind of came to me what to talk about. So I talked about
00:36:00.160 --> 00:36:03.899 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: the 1st night. A. Because it was 2 nights retreat.
00:36:04.640 --> 00:36:06.070 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I talked about
00:36:06.420 --> 00:36:07.720 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: sort of the
00:36:07.930 --> 00:36:11.660 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: a conversation with my dad, and then the second night
00:36:11.840 --> 00:36:14.750 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: about my mom. And basically, it was about
00:36:14.940 --> 00:36:16.489 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: sort of the last
00:36:17.490 --> 00:36:20.690 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: major interaction I had with each of them.
00:36:22.370 --> 00:36:23.870 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and how
00:36:28.930 --> 00:36:33.319 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and the 1st one talking about my dad was really about how
00:36:34.150 --> 00:36:35.810 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: he was so cold.
00:36:36.480 --> 00:36:38.520 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: emotionally unavailable.
00:36:41.650 --> 00:36:43.219 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: how he just wasn't there
00:36:43.370 --> 00:36:44.829 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: in a way for me.
00:36:47.120 --> 00:36:48.840 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and how much that hurts
00:36:48.910 --> 00:36:50.070 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and how much
00:36:52.310 --> 00:36:53.970 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that really affected me.
00:36:58.040 --> 00:37:01.929 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and and I don't need to go into the details at this moment. But.
00:37:02.654 --> 00:37:06.600 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I'm happy. Probably we'll share another time on another show.
00:37:08.840 --> 00:37:14.309 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But how like the last conversation I had with him before he passed away
00:37:15.090 --> 00:37:17.339 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: was just a very cold.
00:37:18.240 --> 00:37:19.740 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: unfeeling
00:37:21.680 --> 00:37:24.569 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: conversation that just left me
00:37:24.800 --> 00:37:26.840 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: emotionally devastated.
00:37:27.920 --> 00:37:28.969 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and then.
00:37:29.670 --> 00:37:36.540 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: 3 or 4 months later, passed away from a massive heart attack. When I was a teenager, when I was in high school.
00:37:41.920 --> 00:37:42.970 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and
00:37:43.230 --> 00:37:44.579 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: the second night
00:37:45.180 --> 00:37:47.530 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I contrasted that with
00:37:48.340 --> 00:37:53.420 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: my mom will live a long time. She died at about 99 and a half.
00:37:54.150 --> 00:37:56.920 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: about a year before the pandemic hit.
00:37:58.930 --> 00:38:00.020 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and
00:38:01.970 --> 00:38:11.669 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: before I went out to see her my mom had moved to Israel when she was 91, to live close to my sister and my sister's kids, because I don't. My wife and I don't have any children.
00:38:13.300 --> 00:38:22.069 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and they got her to move to an assisted living facility there cause she really needed to go into assisted living facility, but was very resistant to it. But
00:38:22.500 --> 00:38:27.779 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: she found one in Israel she liked, and and that we convinced her to go there.
00:38:28.380 --> 00:38:36.650 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: which I gotta hand it to my mom at 91, moving to another country where she didn't speak Hebrew. She spoke Yiddish, but she didn't speak Hebrew.
00:38:36.670 --> 00:38:39.330 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: you know, like that takes quite a lot.
00:38:40.210 --> 00:38:44.639 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and I kind of feel like
00:38:47.070 --> 00:38:56.139 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: part of the reason why she made it to 99 and a half was because she moved Israel when she was 91. So she had stayed here. I don't really think she would have made it that long.
00:39:00.500 --> 00:39:06.659 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But I had done a ceremony for my participated ceremony the weekend before I went out to Israel.
00:39:06.940 --> 00:39:10.390 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: when I had a feeling it might be the last time I was going to see her
00:39:10.940 --> 00:39:18.369 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and those last couple of years when she was alive I'd gone out to Israel like 6 times. It was the most I've ever traveled to Israel in my life.
00:39:19.580 --> 00:39:24.419 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and my wife really encouraged me to to go and talk to her.
00:39:25.250 --> 00:39:26.980 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So I did this ceremony.
00:39:29.360 --> 00:39:31.350 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and in this ceremony
00:39:32.860 --> 00:39:39.759 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I was finally able to see my mom and my dad as a woman and a man, and not just as a mother and a father.
00:39:41.550 --> 00:39:44.029 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and that being able to separate that
00:39:44.680 --> 00:39:46.699 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: being able to see like, Hey.
00:39:48.430 --> 00:39:52.820 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: my mom's not just a mom. My dad's not just a dad. They're human beings.
00:39:53.150 --> 00:39:54.680 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: They're a man and a woman
00:39:54.820 --> 00:39:57.149 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: who've had their own experiences.
00:39:57.590 --> 00:40:02.219 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: who were really just doing the best they could with what they had at the time.
00:40:03.300 --> 00:40:04.460 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and given
00:40:04.590 --> 00:40:06.380 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: the traumas that they suffered.
00:40:06.740 --> 00:40:09.819 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: given what they had to deal with in their life.
00:40:09.980 --> 00:40:11.170 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: given
00:40:11.190 --> 00:40:15.350 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: what was acceptable and normal in society at the time.
00:40:18.390 --> 00:40:21.059 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: They really just did the best they could.
00:40:22.610 --> 00:40:26.790 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and so being able to see that being able to separate that.
00:40:27.900 --> 00:40:31.830 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: but they're not just parents. They're human beings, they're individuals.
00:40:33.090 --> 00:40:36.709 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It helped me to have so much compassion
00:40:37.720 --> 00:40:38.790 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: for them.
00:40:40.340 --> 00:40:41.959 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And it helped me
00:40:42.930 --> 00:40:45.589 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that that last time I saw my mom
00:40:46.850 --> 00:40:49.189 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: to have a conversation with her.
00:40:49.860 --> 00:40:50.710 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: where
00:40:51.170 --> 00:41:02.750 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I apologized for all the grief I had caused her, because, believe me, i i i did cause her grief. You know. I felt I was justified as a as a young teenager, as a man, but
00:41:05.050 --> 00:41:06.579 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: but I really just
00:41:06.980 --> 00:41:09.129 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: owned my end of the
00:41:09.580 --> 00:41:10.910 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: relationship.
00:41:12.200 --> 00:41:16.109 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and told her how much I appreciated all she had done for me.
00:41:16.330 --> 00:41:17.450 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and loves me.
00:41:17.880 --> 00:41:19.050 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and I loved her.
00:41:21.800 --> 00:41:22.720 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and
00:41:22.990 --> 00:41:27.829 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: being my mom and being true to who she was, she didn't say a word.
00:41:28.810 --> 00:41:31.179 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: All she did was just nod her head.
00:41:33.280 --> 00:41:34.589 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And you know what
00:41:35.910 --> 00:41:37.320 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that was perfect.
00:41:38.840 --> 00:41:39.850 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: That was
00:41:40.640 --> 00:41:41.880 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: more than enough.
00:41:45.250 --> 00:41:48.969 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and so I know there are a lot of people out there
00:41:49.830 --> 00:41:55.179 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: who didn't have the chance to have that conversation with their parents before they died.
00:41:55.460 --> 00:41:58.520 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: My my wife didn't, because her mom
00:41:58.680 --> 00:42:01.230 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: died unexpectedly
00:42:01.410 --> 00:42:10.319 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: on the operating table. She had fallen and broken her hip, and they were doing a hip replacement, and there was a blood clot. It went to her lung, and she died. She never came out of the anesthesia.
00:42:12.560 --> 00:42:15.830 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and lots of times we don't get to say goodbye.
00:42:16.770 --> 00:42:21.600 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: We don't get to say the things we want to say to a loved one before they pass.
00:42:22.420 --> 00:42:24.050 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and that can cause
00:42:24.850 --> 00:42:27.360 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: a lot of trauma. A lot of wounding.
00:42:29.870 --> 00:42:31.070 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: However.
00:42:31.940 --> 00:42:35.970 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: even if we don't have a chance to say it to them when they're alive.
00:42:36.830 --> 00:42:39.019 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: we can say to them after the fact.
00:42:40.500 --> 00:42:42.220 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: We can write them a letter.
00:42:42.250 --> 00:42:44.279 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: even though they're no longer alive.
00:42:46.000 --> 00:42:47.679 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: We can say a prayer.
00:42:48.320 --> 00:42:51.160 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: There's all kinds of ways we can communicate.
00:42:52.150 --> 00:42:55.179 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: because in the end it's not really about
00:42:55.560 --> 00:42:58.660 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: the other person hearing what we have to say.
00:42:59.080 --> 00:43:01.690 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: it's about us being able to say it.
00:43:02.120 --> 00:43:05.210 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It's about us being able to express it.
00:43:12.210 --> 00:43:15.649 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And so I told these stories over the weekend.
00:43:16.500 --> 00:43:19.490 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and I don't know why, just what came to me.
00:43:21.320 --> 00:43:28.959 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and I saw that for most of the people there it really helped them to go deeper in their process, help them to really
00:43:29.810 --> 00:43:32.739 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: touch upon something that was really poor.
00:43:38.630 --> 00:43:40.390 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So I know that
00:43:41.550 --> 00:43:43.739 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: when we're truly vulnerable.
00:43:46.240 --> 00:43:50.070 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: When we can share our most painful moments.
00:43:51.400 --> 00:43:53.810 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: we actually help others to heal.
00:43:54.330 --> 00:43:55.899 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and ourselves
00:43:56.280 --> 00:44:01.549 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: cause being able to share these stories. Something I never would have done in the past
00:44:02.000 --> 00:44:04.410 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: would have kept it private locked down.
00:44:05.610 --> 00:44:06.860 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Captain saw.
00:44:09.000 --> 00:44:13.909 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But the more I can share these stories, the more I can share about my core work.
00:44:17.950 --> 00:44:21.030 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Maybe that can help one person out there.
00:44:21.390 --> 00:44:26.610 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Maybe there's somebody listening to this episode listening to this show
00:44:28.640 --> 00:44:32.330 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that here's what I'm saying, and it's touched by it.
00:44:33.070 --> 00:44:34.810 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and can relate to it.
00:44:36.370 --> 00:44:38.540 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Think it'd allow them to just
00:44:39.620 --> 00:44:41.819 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: be present to it in a way
00:44:44.720 --> 00:44:46.289 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that it can serve them
00:44:47.170 --> 00:44:49.250 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: instead of tear them down.
00:44:51.980 --> 00:44:54.919 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Now healing our core wounds is not easy.
00:44:56.450 --> 00:44:58.610 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Oftentimes that fun.
00:44:58.800 --> 00:45:03.090 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It's very uncomfortable being present to the emotions.
00:45:06.360 --> 00:45:09.480 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: but if the energy is there if we're holding on to it.
00:45:10.440 --> 00:45:13.260 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: The only way to heal it is to feel it.
00:45:17.070 --> 00:45:19.140 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I guess that was a an angel
00:45:20.060 --> 00:45:21.770 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: giving me a thumbs up.
00:45:22.150 --> 00:45:24.599 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: The only way to heal it is to feel it.
00:45:26.750 --> 00:45:31.410 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and that's the thing. We often don't want to feel these painful moments.
00:45:31.880 --> 00:45:34.009 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: We often don't want to
00:45:36.410 --> 00:45:37.580 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: go there
00:45:37.780 --> 00:45:41.320 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: because we don't want to be a blubbering mess on the floor
00:45:42.870 --> 00:45:46.180 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: sometimes. That's exactly what we need to be
00:45:47.770 --> 00:45:50.559 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: unwind to release.
00:45:51.090 --> 00:45:55.670 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: to let go of the energy we've been holding around these stories and these
00:45:55.950 --> 00:45:57.460 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: incidences
00:45:57.480 --> 00:45:58.700 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: for so long.
00:46:01.120 --> 00:46:01.910 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: so
00:46:02.540 --> 00:46:03.370 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: of
00:46:04.070 --> 00:46:05.120 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: deserve.
00:46:05.900 --> 00:46:06.580 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Well.
00:46:07.000 --> 00:46:17.560 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I talked about my dad's core, my my core rule with my dad didn't really tell you what the core room is with my mom. So when we come back still got a little bit of time, I want to wrap this up. But yeah, let me
00:46:18.450 --> 00:46:23.729 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: kind of share with you what that core wound around my mom was why it took me so long
00:46:24.230 --> 00:46:29.139 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: to come to the place of being able to forgive her and have compassion for her around it.
00:46:29.970 --> 00:46:39.109 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So everyone, please stay tuned. You're listening to the conscious, consult hour awakening humanity, and we'll be right back to wrap up the show in just a moment.
00:48:47.480 --> 00:48:50.580 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So we're talking today about healing our core world.
00:48:51.090 --> 00:48:52.120 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: which is
00:48:52.870 --> 00:48:56.049 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: not an overly exciting topic.
00:48:57.960 --> 00:49:00.109 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: but it's an important one.
00:49:01.370 --> 00:49:05.960 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And so I talked about my core, one of my rooms with my dad.
00:49:07.630 --> 00:49:12.739 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and there are others. I mean, you know, there are always multiple things. There were just one thing.
00:49:15.100 --> 00:49:19.260 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and with my mom didn't really touch upon what that court wound is.
00:49:22.320 --> 00:49:24.260 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: My mom, being a
00:49:26.190 --> 00:49:28.489 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: a child over the depression era.
00:49:31.880 --> 00:49:33.979 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: was very, typically.
00:49:35.990 --> 00:49:37.750 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: very frugal.
00:49:38.980 --> 00:49:41.629 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: very careful with how she spent money.
00:49:42.580 --> 00:49:44.940 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and because she was so frugal.
00:49:45.960 --> 00:49:47.140 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: There was this
00:49:47.720 --> 00:49:52.699 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: story I made around it that money was more important to her than I was.
00:49:54.770 --> 00:49:56.579 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and I even remember
00:49:56.750 --> 00:49:57.850 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: no, yep.
00:49:59.340 --> 00:50:03.739 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I don't think I've told this story on the show, but I've told this story to people before that.
00:50:04.590 --> 00:50:06.430 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Remember being a little kid.
00:50:06.640 --> 00:50:11.010 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I mean, I don't know how old 5, 4, 5 years old.
00:50:11.510 --> 00:50:14.350 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: you know. Small enough to kind of fit in the
00:50:14.550 --> 00:50:17.550 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: child seat of a shopping cart at the supermarket.
00:50:19.120 --> 00:50:24.810 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and you know we buying food. I was with my mom. She's buying food, and you know they had the
00:50:24.910 --> 00:50:28.350 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: little racks with like toys hanging down. And there was this
00:50:28.800 --> 00:50:29.360 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: this
00:50:31.060 --> 00:50:36.909 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: like little race car with a track. It wound up in a plastic bag with a
00:50:36.990 --> 00:50:39.059 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: cardboard thing on top.
00:50:40.340 --> 00:50:41.660 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and I was like.
00:50:41.940 --> 00:50:44.359 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Oh, mommy, can you get that for me?
00:50:44.980 --> 00:50:47.420 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And she looks at and she looks, and there's a.
00:50:47.830 --> 00:50:50.649 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: The price was written on the plastic bag.
00:50:53.190 --> 00:50:54.390 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and
00:50:54.820 --> 00:50:58.770 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: she poked her finger in the plastic bag where the price was written.
00:50:59.270 --> 00:51:01.229 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: so you could only see
00:51:01.630 --> 00:51:08.290 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: the change part, not the dollar amount. So instead of it being I don't know how much it was, I'm just gonna guess, like
00:51:08.300 --> 00:51:11.600 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: 2, 99 or something or 3 99.
00:51:11.610 --> 00:51:14.449 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: It was just 99 cents. It made it look like.
00:51:15.220 --> 00:51:16.350 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And
00:51:17.170 --> 00:51:21.909 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: even you're a little kid, you kinda know. That's not the right thing to do.
00:51:22.960 --> 00:51:24.270 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and
00:51:24.940 --> 00:51:35.890 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: we got to the checkout counter, the cashiers ringing things up, and I was super embarrassed, and I thought the cashier was going to say something to my mom, but she just rung it up as she saw it.
00:51:36.720 --> 00:51:42.109 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And so my mom got me the little toy, but I was so embarrassed by what she did.
00:51:45.140 --> 00:51:51.120 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And that's like my earliest childhood memory of something like that. And she would do things like that
00:51:51.670 --> 00:51:53.330 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: over and over again.
00:51:56.100 --> 00:51:57.320 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and and
00:51:58.590 --> 00:52:02.430 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: the story I made around that was
00:52:03.170 --> 00:52:08.939 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that I'm not good enough, that I'm not worthy that money is more important to her than I was.
00:52:13.030 --> 00:52:16.790 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and so I would do things when I got older.
00:52:19.170 --> 00:52:20.070 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Bad
00:52:20.770 --> 00:52:22.749 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: would end up costing her money.
00:52:23.780 --> 00:52:25.500 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: You know. It's like I had a
00:52:26.230 --> 00:52:30.649 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: do something for her to spend more money on me to prove that she left me.
00:52:31.350 --> 00:52:33.360 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Eventually I grew out of that.
00:52:35.490 --> 00:52:44.810 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and and she actually ended up doing quite a lot for me after I got married as an adult, and once I kind of healed my relationship with her.
00:52:47.060 --> 00:52:49.519 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But that was my mom, and and and
00:52:50.280 --> 00:52:54.939 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: what I was able to see when I was able to see her as a woman and not as a mother.
00:52:56.670 --> 00:52:59.169 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: was that she was raising 3 kids.
00:53:00.750 --> 00:53:13.190 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: She always said my dad never gave her enough money to run the household. She went back to being a she. She started working for the city as a school teacher when I was, you know, old enough to go to school myself
00:53:13.320 --> 00:53:18.169 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: to make extra money, and she was trying to do her best to make ends meet.
00:53:18.960 --> 00:53:22.839 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: She was always clipping coupons, and always being very frugal.
00:53:26.580 --> 00:53:28.080 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and so she
00:53:28.200 --> 00:53:30.229 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: see there are 2 ways to interpret it.
00:53:31.820 --> 00:53:34.309 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Money's more important to her than I am.
00:53:34.810 --> 00:53:38.319 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: or she's being as frugal as possible, so that she can give us
00:53:38.500 --> 00:53:41.889 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: the best that she can give us, or give us the most she can give us.
00:53:49.170 --> 00:53:54.890 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So it's not easy to unwind. Years and years and years
00:53:55.030 --> 00:54:00.710 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: of seeing her do things like that. I'm just giving you like the earliest example I can. I can remember
00:54:01.280 --> 00:54:03.259 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: she did many things like that.
00:54:05.150 --> 00:54:07.709 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and the story I made around it
00:54:07.820 --> 00:54:09.689 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: totally did not serve me.
00:54:11.700 --> 00:54:13.639 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and it was only until
00:54:15.010 --> 00:54:16.639 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I could really
00:54:17.850 --> 00:54:18.890 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: c
00:54:19.190 --> 00:54:20.870 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: her individually.
00:54:23.190 --> 00:54:24.860 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and see also the
00:54:25.560 --> 00:54:32.180 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: the challenges that she had been through from losing her sister when she was 13 years old, seeing her parents
00:54:32.360 --> 00:54:36.079 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: go through having cancer 1st one and then the other.
00:54:39.770 --> 00:54:41.300 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Not so easy.
00:54:43.390 --> 00:54:45.070 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: not easy at all.
00:54:53.740 --> 00:54:54.630 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: so
00:54:55.820 --> 00:54:57.609 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: you know, it's kind of funny
00:54:57.940 --> 00:55:05.780 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: how sometimes our biggest wounding comes from the stories that we make up around an incident as opposed to the incident itself.
00:55:11.130 --> 00:55:13.709 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And so I was able to
00:55:13.800 --> 00:55:20.500 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: unwind, and I'm sure there's more work there. Believe me, I'm not saying I'm perfect. I'm not saying that like I've got everything together.
00:55:24.510 --> 00:55:31.329 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: But as I was able to tell myself a different story around these incidences.
00:55:31.960 --> 00:55:35.620 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: as I was able to tell a different story
00:55:37.400 --> 00:55:40.379 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: about why she did what she did.
00:55:41.960 --> 00:55:44.870 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Energy around it shifted at light.
00:55:48.200 --> 00:55:50.430 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So when we're dealing with these core.
00:55:51.280 --> 00:55:55.700 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: then, in particular, it's normally the wounds around our parents
00:56:00.550 --> 00:56:04.799 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: when we're dealing with these core wounds
00:56:07.740 --> 00:56:09.769 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: being able to step back.
00:56:11.670 --> 00:56:18.869 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: being able to view the whole situation from a bigger context. Taking in all
00:56:19.270 --> 00:56:21.419 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: of the information we can
00:56:23.310 --> 00:56:26.230 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: really helps to see things differently.
00:56:28.420 --> 00:56:32.220 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: There's that old expression that only hurt people hurt people.
00:56:34.850 --> 00:56:36.490 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and that our core will.
00:56:37.560 --> 00:56:42.480 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: where we've been hurt, come from people who are hurt themselves
00:56:42.910 --> 00:56:46.730 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: who are not that conscious necessarily about what they're doing.
00:56:50.390 --> 00:56:55.200 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: The only way to unwind, that is, to take it to a bigger context.
00:56:56.700 --> 00:56:58.230 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: to remove
00:56:58.560 --> 00:57:00.599 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: the personal stuff from it
00:57:01.800 --> 00:57:03.040 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and see it.
00:57:06.480 --> 00:57:07.670 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: or what it is.
00:57:08.700 --> 00:57:12.480 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: A man or a woman acting like a man or a woman
00:57:12.860 --> 00:57:16.040 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: who's had unique circumstances.
00:57:16.980 --> 00:57:17.900 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: who's
00:57:18.540 --> 00:57:21.580 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: dealing with their own struggles and their own pain.
00:57:23.990 --> 00:57:29.110 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and just doing the best they can, and sometimes the best they can do is pretty bad.
00:57:34.720 --> 00:57:35.650 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: so
00:57:36.400 --> 00:57:38.940 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I don't know if if these stories
00:57:39.350 --> 00:57:41.020 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: help or not.
00:57:41.830 --> 00:57:44.469 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I don't know if you can relate to these or not.
00:57:45.820 --> 00:57:48.110 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: but I hope there's some little piece
00:57:48.850 --> 00:57:51.029 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: in all I've said this hour
00:57:51.210 --> 00:57:53.760 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: that serves you, that supports you.
00:57:54.710 --> 00:58:00.660 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and I'd love to hear from you. So please comment on the on the videos. The live streams
00:58:00.790 --> 00:58:03.129 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: feel free to send me an email.
00:58:03.160 --> 00:58:07.389 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Sam at the conscious consultant.com.
00:58:08.170 --> 00:58:09.449 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and let me know.
00:58:09.770 --> 00:58:12.740 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and let me know if you want. If me, being
00:58:12.870 --> 00:58:16.149 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: vulnerable is valuable to you if it helps.
00:58:17.080 --> 00:58:26.690 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And and should I continue to do this with my me only shows in the future? Or should I try something different. I'd love to hear from you because I do this show to serve you.
00:58:29.640 --> 00:58:31.659 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: So that's the show. For this week
00:58:34.260 --> 00:58:40.060 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: I'm wishing all of my loyal listeners and all the beautiful people out there tuning in
00:58:41.210 --> 00:58:43.709 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: the best that life has to offer.
00:58:44.680 --> 00:58:46.040 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: to know that
00:58:46.590 --> 00:58:50.279 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: even the most difficult situations you can get through.
00:58:51.040 --> 00:58:55.919 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and we'll be back next week with a guest. So you don't have to listen to me. Ramble for an hour.
00:58:57.360 --> 00:59:04.509 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: so take care, everyone. Remember, if you missed any part of today's show, you can always catch the replay on talk, radio, Nyc.
00:59:04.950 --> 00:59:09.959 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: and you can always find the conscious consultant hour and all the podcasting platforms.
00:59:10.010 --> 00:59:15.989 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: And if you're really enjoying the podcast please leave a review, give us some stars.
00:59:16.460 --> 00:59:21.550 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant: Let other people know, don't keep us a secret. Take care, everyone! We'll talk to you next week.
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