Thursdays 12:00pm - 1:00pm (EDT)
EPISODE SUMMARY:
This week, on The Conscious Consultant Hour, Sam is pleased to welcome Psychotherapist, Teacher, Author, and Mestre, Dr. Don St John.
Don St John Ph.D. has been walking in the fields of psychological, somatic and spiritual healing for 60 years. Over time, he encountered not just tools and techniques, but different schools of thought, both novel and derived from wide-ranging sources. Decades of exploration led him to construct a view of healing, purpose and human potential that includes four essential and interrelated components: the Somatic, the Psycho-Emotional, the Relational, and the Spiritual.
At 81 years old, he still practices psychotherapy, and he teaches Continuum, which means he teaches folks half his age to move fluidly.
He has developed a Four Pillar Approach to healing, which he defines as the process of becoming whole. Reared in a climate of ignorance and abuse, his life has been dedicated to healing and to understanding what is necessary to fulfill our potential.
He is the author of the award-winning Healing the Wounds of Childhood, and its revision Healing the Wounds of Childhood and Culture: An Adventure of a Lifetime
Tune in for this enlightening conversation at TalkRadio.nyc
In this episode of The Conscious Consultant Hour, Sam is joined by Dr. Don St John as they discuss his work along with The Four Pillar Approach of Dr. John’s design. To start the episode, Sam starts by reading from his blog, and the one he chooses to read is entitled, “To Truly Feel A Compliment, We Must Make Space To Take It In.” As always to read this post and more content from Sam, please visit www.talkradio.nyc/blogs or www.theconsciousconsultant.com for more information. Afterward, we are given a formal introduction to Dr. John and finish the segment by talking about Dr. John’s background and why he entered the field of healing and psychotherapy.
After the first break, we return to Sam and Dr. John discussing how Dr. John developed his Four Pillars and where he got the inspiration to create this approach. He also thoroughly explains how the pillars work and how we are supposed to view them. They finish the segment by discussing the fluid aspect of our bodies and Dr. John shares if there are ways to change the shift of moving the liquids of our bodies.
As the interview continues, Sam asks Dr. John about his book, “Healing the Wounds of Childhood,” and what inspired him to write it. He goes on to classify different kinds of trauma as “Big Ts” and “Little Ts” along with their meanings and Dr. John provides different examples of these from both a hypothetical and personal point of view.
As the episode comes to an end, Sam and Dr. John finish their discussion by talking about the spiritual aspect of his work and how he balances it in his Four Pillar Approach. Dr. John shares his own spiritual journey and how he was able to incorporate it into his practices and revelations. To learn more about Dr. John and his work, please visit www.pathsofconnection.com for more details.
00:00:40.250 --> 00:01:03.340 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Good afternoon, my conscious co-creators. Good morning. Good evening. Wherever you're tuning in from welcome to the conscious consultant hour awakening humanity. I am very, very pleased that you were here with me today. I know you probably missed my show last week because it was 4th of July, and we decided to take off for the holiday. So we didn't have a new show last week.
00:01:03.647 --> 00:01:13.169 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: But today we do. We have a wonderful guest in store for you who I'm excited to bring on. So I wanna get to that quickly. But first, st of course.
00:01:14.037 --> 00:01:22.940 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: we have our blog post from a couple of years ago, just taking them in order. And today's a blog is entitled
00:01:24.070 --> 00:01:29.490 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: to truly feel a compliment. We must make space to take it in.
00:01:30.510 --> 00:01:36.250 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: We all love to get compliments. It feels good to hear others speak kindly about us.
00:01:36.470 --> 00:01:39.279 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: yet sometimes there's a challenge to it.
00:01:39.550 --> 00:01:43.129 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: We can have difficulty receiving the compliment.
00:01:43.520 --> 00:01:49.469 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: especially when it is about a part of us we don't feel very good about
00:01:49.830 --> 00:01:56.710 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: no matter what other people say. We just can't feel it ourselves.
00:01:57.370 --> 00:01:59.849 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Perhaps we don't feel as good.
00:02:01.820 --> 00:02:05.740 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: We don't feel as good looking or as pretty as they say.
00:02:06.050 --> 00:02:12.709 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Maybe we just can't connect with the idea that we're smart, capable, or wise.
00:02:13.000 --> 00:02:21.409 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: It can be hard to take in such compliments when we, when we are not used to them, or feel we haven't earned them
00:02:22.200 --> 00:02:26.980 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: a lot of it may come down to early childhood experiences.
00:02:27.640 --> 00:02:30.759 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: If we were never complimented by our parents.
00:02:30.980 --> 00:02:33.200 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: then how can we be good
00:02:33.580 --> 00:02:37.180 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: when we are used to being told that we can do better.
00:02:38.060 --> 00:02:42.559 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: How can we feel that we actually have done better.
00:02:42.910 --> 00:02:46.169 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: no matter what anyone else says.
00:02:46.360 --> 00:02:48.260 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: we have to feel it.
00:02:48.980 --> 00:02:52.880 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: we might momentarily acknowledge the compliment.
00:02:52.900 --> 00:02:55.900 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: and then immediately move on to something else.
00:02:56.550 --> 00:03:00.839 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: or we could ignore the compliment or altogether.
00:03:01.590 --> 00:03:02.690 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: for if we
00:03:02.780 --> 00:03:08.000 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: don't truly feel it in our body, our minds cannot register it.
00:03:08.300 --> 00:03:11.980 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Our nervous system can't process the compliment.
00:03:12.100 --> 00:03:16.269 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: no matter how many times we hear it does not matter.
00:03:16.940 --> 00:03:20.359 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: So how do we learn to let these compliments
00:03:20.600 --> 00:03:23.539 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: in that we cannot feel?
00:03:24.447 --> 00:03:26.710 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: The 1st step is to wait.
00:03:27.260 --> 00:03:30.310 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Do not respond right away.
00:03:30.830 --> 00:03:33.739 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Just take a moment and try to feel it.
00:03:34.360 --> 00:03:38.260 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: The more awareness we bring to hearing the compliment.
00:03:38.280 --> 00:03:42.170 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: the better chance we have of actually letting it in.
00:03:42.950 --> 00:03:45.789 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: It might not happen the 1st time
00:03:46.240 --> 00:03:47.779 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: for the second time.
00:03:48.560 --> 00:03:54.930 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: but if we stick with the practice eventually we will start to feel it a tiny bit.
00:03:55.810 --> 00:03:57.190 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: and then more.
00:03:58.020 --> 00:04:03.570 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: We can also use some physical cues to help us to receive the compliment.
00:04:04.040 --> 00:04:06.979 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: like putting your hand over your heart
00:04:09.710 --> 00:04:11.440 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: and take a moment.
00:04:12.420 --> 00:04:14.139 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: then try saying.
00:04:14.380 --> 00:04:15.390 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Thank you.
00:04:17.130 --> 00:04:24.799 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: By taking time to acknowledging the compliment. You give your body time to feel it.
00:04:25.860 --> 00:04:29.130 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: even if you can't feel it in the beginning.
00:04:29.590 --> 00:04:31.800 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: With practice you will.
00:04:32.270 --> 00:04:35.820 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: The more space we give ourselves to feel something
00:04:36.130 --> 00:04:37.280 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: anything.
00:04:37.540 --> 00:04:41.040 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: the more likely we are to actually feel it.
00:04:42.420 --> 00:04:46.560 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: So over time, with patience and practice.
00:04:47.120 --> 00:04:49.320 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: We will feel these compliments.
00:04:49.700 --> 00:04:53.599 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: even if they seem hollow and untrue in the beginning.
00:04:54.090 --> 00:04:57.409 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: If people keep telling you that you are good.
00:04:57.550 --> 00:05:01.480 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: handsome, smart, dependable, pretty.
00:05:01.910 --> 00:05:07.080 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Then they are reflecting something back to you that they see clearly.
00:05:07.740 --> 00:05:10.049 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: even if we don't.
00:05:10.980 --> 00:05:17.270 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: So we can all practice giving more space to the moment when someone pays us a compliment.
00:05:18.400 --> 00:05:22.300 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: and one day, when we say Thank you.
00:05:22.990 --> 00:05:25.320 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: we will really mean it.
00:05:26.900 --> 00:05:32.140 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: So when have you been paid a compliment? And truly taking it in.
00:05:32.640 --> 00:05:38.289 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Can you give more space when someone says something nice about you to really feel it
00:05:38.360 --> 00:05:39.780 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: and take it in?
00:05:42.970 --> 00:05:44.120 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: So
00:05:44.976 --> 00:05:48.540 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: I wrote this blog post a couple of years ago.
00:05:48.790 --> 00:05:49.870 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: and
00:05:49.890 --> 00:05:57.419 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: it had been something that had been in my consciousness in my field for a while, something I'd learned from one of my old mentors
00:05:59.640 --> 00:06:00.500 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: that
00:06:00.860 --> 00:06:05.789 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: many times we really do have a hard time receiving
00:06:06.220 --> 00:06:08.870 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: when someone pays us a compliment.
00:06:10.925 --> 00:06:18.059 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: And even if someone just does something nice for us, I mean, just receiving in general sometimes is difficult.
00:06:20.160 --> 00:06:21.590 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: And so
00:06:22.840 --> 00:06:33.300 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: I I was working with someone, and and they gave them a compliment, and they immediately, like went off on a totally different tangent, and I was like, Wait a minute, wait a minute.
00:06:34.460 --> 00:06:35.590 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Take that in.
00:06:35.870 --> 00:06:38.339 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: I just said your da.
00:06:42.010 --> 00:06:51.709 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: and and they pause for a moment, and then they realize, wow! That actually is really hard. They really can't feel it in their body.
00:06:53.650 --> 00:06:56.930 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: And so that's when I started to realize that
00:06:57.080 --> 00:07:01.830 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: it is actually a much more common condition than we realize.
00:07:03.410 --> 00:07:08.099 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: And so that's why I decided to write a blog post about it, because I felt like
00:07:08.180 --> 00:07:12.189 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: there are a lot of people out there who could really use this.
00:07:13.330 --> 00:07:21.830 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: And so one thing that I do. And this is why I wrote about it in the post is when someone pays me a compliment, and I really wanna take it in.
00:07:22.570 --> 00:07:26.709 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: I put my hand over my heart as a way of saying Thank you.
00:07:26.990 --> 00:07:28.560 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: And it also is a
00:07:28.680 --> 00:07:32.799 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: physical touch, a physical sensation that reminds me like, Oh.
00:07:33.260 --> 00:07:34.530 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: take a moment
00:07:34.950 --> 00:07:36.400 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: feel that
00:07:36.790 --> 00:07:38.480 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: really let it in.
00:07:41.050 --> 00:07:43.610 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: And you know, in the beginning.
00:07:44.090 --> 00:07:47.039 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: could I feel it? Not that much.
00:07:47.500 --> 00:07:50.289 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: but over time, the more I did it
00:07:50.490 --> 00:07:52.470 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: more, I was able to feel it.
00:07:53.790 --> 00:07:59.799 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: And so now, when somebody pays me a compliment, I don't even have to do that anymore. I just look at them.
00:08:00.090 --> 00:08:03.300 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Take a breath, I smile a big smile.
00:08:03.500 --> 00:08:05.139 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: I just say, thank you.
00:08:06.730 --> 00:08:09.669 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: and I don't immediately try and compliment them back.
00:08:09.820 --> 00:08:11.899 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: See? That's 1 of the key things.
00:08:11.960 --> 00:08:21.480 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Oftentimes someone gives us a compliment. We feel like we have to give them a compliment back. It's almost transactional, you know. We feel bad if we don't compliment them back. No.
00:08:22.180 --> 00:08:30.659 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: just because someone gives you a compliment. You do not have to compliment them back right away. It doesn't mean you don't compliment them as long as you're doing it sincerely.
00:08:31.120 --> 00:08:34.629 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: but give a moment to just receive the compliment.
00:08:34.960 --> 00:08:36.800 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: really feel it.
00:08:37.039 --> 00:08:42.399 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: maybe continue on with the conversation, and then later on compliment them about something.
00:08:42.990 --> 00:08:49.000 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: because otherwise it starts becoming a tug of war, of compliments, and then nobody is dealing
00:08:51.040 --> 00:08:51.915 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: so.
00:08:53.190 --> 00:08:57.130 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Your your mission. Should you choose to accept it for this week?
00:08:59.330 --> 00:09:02.149 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: is when someone gives you a compliment.
00:09:02.800 --> 00:09:04.260 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: take some time.
00:09:04.720 --> 00:09:06.950 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: stop and really feel it.
00:09:08.450 --> 00:09:13.719 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: and see how easy or how difficult is it for you to feel that compliment.
00:09:14.940 --> 00:09:18.269 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: and I'd be curious to hear about it next week.
00:09:18.480 --> 00:09:31.740 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: So if you're tuning in this week, and and and you're gonna do it. This like, put a little something in the chat and say, Hey, yes, I'm I'm gonna do it this week, and then next week, let me know. I'd like to know how how that exercise does for you.
00:09:32.320 --> 00:09:38.359 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: So that's my blog post. It's entitled to truly feel a compliment. We much. We must make space
00:09:38.730 --> 00:09:40.119 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: to take it in.
00:09:40.580 --> 00:09:54.029 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: And you could always find my blog on the radio station. Talkradio, dot nyc slash blog as well as on my personal branded website, the conscious consultant.com
00:09:54.740 --> 00:10:05.310 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: alright. Now it is my extreme pleasure to welcome to the show. Psychotherapist, teacher, author, maestra, doctor, Don St. John.
00:10:05.420 --> 00:10:23.880 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Doctor Don has been working in the fields of psychological, somatic, and spiritual healing for over 60 years over time he encountered not just tools and techniques, but different schools of thought, both novel and derived from wide, ranging sources.
00:10:26.064 --> 00:10:41.260 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Decades of exploration led him to construct a view of healing purpose and human potential that includes 4 essential and interrelated components, the somatic, the psycho, emotional, the relational, and the spiritual.
00:10:41.560 --> 00:10:55.680 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: At 81 years old, he still practices psychotherapy. That's what he's that's longevity man, and he teaches continuum, which means he teaches folks half his age to more fluidity.
00:10:55.690 --> 00:11:23.569 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: He has developed a 4 pillar approach to healing, which he defines as the process of becoming whole. Reared in a climate of ignorance and abuse, his life has been dedicated to healing and to understanding what is necessary to fulfill our potential. He is also the award-winning author of healing the wounds of childhood and its revision, healing the wounds of childhood and culture, an adventure of a lifetime. Welcome to the conscious, consult
00:11:23.890 --> 00:11:24.530 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: such and.
00:11:24.530 --> 00:11:31.880 Don St John: Say delight to be here with you, Sam. I loved your blog that you just read
00:11:31.890 --> 00:11:34.840 Don St John: so aligned with what I
00:11:34.850 --> 00:11:36.779 Don St John: like to talk about.
00:11:36.780 --> 00:11:48.432 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Wonderful wonderful. Thank you. Yeah, it's so funny. i i i mean, the blogs are always. I'm just reading them in order, but somehow they're always so apropos to who my guest is for that week.
00:11:49.080 --> 00:11:50.840 Don St John: I propose to
00:11:50.910 --> 00:11:52.649 Don St John: what we'll talk about.
00:11:52.650 --> 00:12:01.079 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Yes, yes, very much. So I'm I'm looking forward to the conversation, so I always like to start off to give my audience a little bit of sort of
00:12:01.090 --> 00:12:30.360 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: context and background. How did you decide to become a psychotherapist? A lot of people tend to avoid that field because psychotherapists don't make a whole lot of money. They do. Okay? But going into the healing arts is not something people do as most parents want their children to become doctors, lawyers, accountants, what got you to decide to go into the fields of healing.
00:12:30.620 --> 00:12:36.529 Don St John: You're right. It's not a path towards becoming a billionaire, for sure.
00:12:36.560 --> 00:12:42.940 Don St John: but they can be extremely satisfying. And
00:12:43.090 --> 00:12:50.940 Don St John: yeah, I had no idea when I graduated from high school. What I wanted to do with my life like
00:12:51.678 --> 00:12:55.750 Don St John: had given up my earlier teenage dream of
00:12:55.880 --> 00:13:03.149 Don St John: becoming a professional prize fighter. And no, I'm serious. I mean, you know, that
00:13:03.350 --> 00:13:14.489 Don St John: that's the environment that I grew up in. There was a fair amount of violence, ignorance, you know it was quite traumatic.
00:13:15.210 --> 00:13:25.261 Don St John: and as a result, I was a pretty fragmented and frozen character, with, you know, a certain amount of intelligence.
00:13:25.990 --> 00:13:31.109 Don St John: but below my neck. I hardly existed. So
00:13:31.480 --> 00:13:35.498 Don St John: no, I went into the military, and and there I
00:13:35.940 --> 00:13:42.989 Don St John: I was stationed overseas. Bermuda. Call that overseas. And yeah, right.
00:13:42.990 --> 00:13:43.430 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Up, good.
00:13:43.430 --> 00:13:51.089 Don St John: And began taking some college classes with the University of Maryland's overseas program
00:13:51.270 --> 00:14:10.760 Don St John: and realized that, wow! They treat you like an adult. And I liked it, you know. I actually liked going to school. So when I was discharged, after 4 years I continued at the University of South Florida in Tampa.
00:14:10.830 --> 00:14:16.889 Don St John: and you know, I I had started psychotherapy myself.
00:14:16.890 --> 00:14:17.330 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Group.
00:14:17.330 --> 00:14:20.210 Don St John: Because after a kilometers
00:14:20.270 --> 00:14:22.150 Don St John: experience
00:14:22.330 --> 00:14:32.832 Don St John: drinking all night and ending up in a hospital. And I realized I needed help. So I saw a psychotherapist, and, you know.
00:14:33.370 --> 00:14:45.939 Don St John: looked like an interesting thing to do to sit and talk to people and get paid for it. Okay, I might be able to do that, and you know. So that's how I would have I put one foot in front of the other. And
00:14:46.621 --> 00:14:58.049 Don St John: as you mentioned, it's it's been 60 years since I began that process and continue to this day. I really
00:14:58.120 --> 00:15:01.459 Don St John: I call it an adventure, because.
00:15:01.540 --> 00:15:22.819 Don St John: you know, obviously there are many, many challenges, but the rewards can be so gratifying, you know a very positive sense of myself, a much greater ability to take in compliments, to take in love.
00:15:22.870 --> 00:15:27.390 Don St John: see, and it's it's a it's an epidemic, you know.
00:15:28.429 --> 00:15:35.419 Don St John: The the Surgeon General. The United States spoke of a of a loneliness epidemic.
00:15:35.930 --> 00:15:41.110 Don St John: And you know a part of that is our inability
00:15:41.300 --> 00:15:44.059 Don St John: to let in
00:15:44.210 --> 00:15:58.010 Don St John: good vibes, good feelings, love compliments, you know, to really receive. So we're stuck in the images that we constructed throughout our childhood.
00:15:58.040 --> 00:16:03.760 Don St John: and usually the theme is not good enough.
00:16:03.760 --> 00:16:04.280 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Yeah.
00:16:04.280 --> 00:16:07.649 Don St John: You. You mentioned that. So you know
00:16:08.030 --> 00:16:19.040 Don St John: there are many, many rewards, a marriage of 40 years that's still lively, you know. That's intimate that we can really disclose
00:16:19.190 --> 00:16:36.879 Don St John: at our depth and not just on the surface. And that's that is one of the most profound rewards of embarking on this journey, and staying the course.
00:16:37.110 --> 00:16:42.000 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Wonderful wonderful. So just to let you know my wife is also a psychotherapist.
00:16:42.401 --> 00:16:52.169 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: We've we've only been married 21 years. We're youngsters compared to you. So so for her sake, I do have to ask you one question, because one thing to us is one of the hardest things
00:16:52.290 --> 00:17:05.290 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: to deal with this burnout, because many therapists, after a period of time, they do get to that point of burnout. So I'm just curious. What do you do? Do you have some practice or something that kind of
00:17:05.349 --> 00:17:18.670 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: keeps you going? Because listening to people's problems all day long? Yes, it it's very gratifying and and and very profound, being able to help people to get over their challenges. But it can be where you out sometimes. No.
00:17:18.970 --> 00:17:22.650 Don St John: Yes, it it can. And
00:17:23.550 --> 00:17:27.480 Don St John: you know there's a there's a continuum of
00:17:27.530 --> 00:17:38.410 Don St John: ability to not take it home with you. My wife is a therapist also, and it's a little more challenging for her. She's.
00:17:38.570 --> 00:17:43.590 Don St John: you know, just naturally more empathic and absorbent.
00:17:43.590 --> 00:17:44.450 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Right.
00:17:44.450 --> 00:17:55.919 Don St John: And I was. I started on the other extreme. I had to. I had to learn to be empathic, so it's easier for me to leave it at the door.
00:17:56.130 --> 00:18:01.340 Don St John: The other thing is, you know, I am 81 years old, so I don't
00:18:01.410 --> 00:18:06.869 Don St John: keep a full practice. I keep about a 40% of full
00:18:07.470 --> 00:18:16.789 Don St John: practice. And the 3, rd as I've gotten older, I've given myself more permission
00:18:16.980 --> 00:18:25.350 Don St John: as a therapist to really engage my clients at a human loving level.
00:18:25.990 --> 00:18:30.890 Don St John: And that's also energizing. You know. I I don't
00:18:31.360 --> 00:18:35.529 Don St John: feel so constrained by the role.
00:18:35.680 --> 00:18:40.550 Don St John: by the laws, but you know I just feel
00:18:40.620 --> 00:18:41.860 Don St John: freer
00:18:41.940 --> 00:18:43.570 Don St John: to be myself
00:18:43.780 --> 00:18:48.930 Don St John: in that consultation room, and I think that helps as well.
00:18:48.930 --> 00:18:57.406 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful. I I have a lot of questions. I wanna get into your 4 pillar approach. But we gotta take a quick break first.st
00:18:57.760 --> 00:19:27.039 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: So when we come back. Le, I wanna start talking about how you develop this idea of this 4 pillar approach. And I'm gonna relate to it, because it's something that really spoke to me, and I'll explain why. So everyone, please stay tuned. You're listening to the conscious consult now, or weakening humanity. We do this every Thursday except for holidays 12 noon to one Pm. Eastern time, right here in talk radio, Nyc, and we'll be right back with our guest, Doctor Don St. John, in just a moment.
00:21:42.620 --> 00:21:54.215 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: And welcome back to the conscious, consulting hour awakening humanity. We're speaking this hour with Dr. Don St. John, author of the book, healing the wounds of childhood.
00:21:55.050 --> 00:22:06.610 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: so I I was really interested to to learn about sort of this. I don't know if you call it a system or your approach to healing. Because it's something that speaks to me
00:22:06.990 --> 00:22:08.772 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: because I've been
00:22:10.534 --> 00:22:15.200 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: studying and trained in in some lineages where we talk about
00:22:15.380 --> 00:22:22.180 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: heart, mind, body, and spirit, and many people in the healing world. They just talk about mind, body, spirit.
00:22:22.320 --> 00:22:26.729 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: and so I always like to throw the heart in there which is sort of the emotional side which
00:22:26.770 --> 00:22:44.160 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: kind of relates to your 4 components of of healing. And I'm curious how you develop this this 4 pillar approach kind of where it came from, and and if you could just explain it to our audience so that they can get some insight into it.
00:22:44.930 --> 00:23:03.910 Don St John: Sure it's it's a big question, Sam, and it evolved out of my own experience, out of my own pursuit of healing for myself and my interest in understanding. What does it take to become
00:23:03.920 --> 00:23:07.860 Don St John: more and more fully ourselves?
00:23:08.140 --> 00:23:25.759 Don St John: And you know, I I talk about, if you go onto a campus. The physical therapy department and the psychotherapy department are usually on the opposite sides of the campus. And that's not nature's
00:23:25.990 --> 00:23:29.299 Don St John: concept. That's that's ours.
00:23:29.300 --> 00:23:29.920 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Yeah.
00:23:29.920 --> 00:23:30.630 Don St John: So.
00:23:30.970 --> 00:23:33.409 Don St John: Trauma, for example.
00:23:33.840 --> 00:23:37.570 Don St John: affects every aspect of our being.
00:23:38.330 --> 00:23:44.389 Don St John: We've come to realize that it affects the brain, and it affects the nervous system.
00:23:44.440 --> 00:23:49.900 Don St John: and that's a step forward. But we're just now. And I mean, like
00:23:50.100 --> 00:23:58.280 Don St John: recently beginning to realize that it affects all the tissues in the body.
00:23:58.480 --> 00:24:05.439 Don St John: And I speak a lot about the fluid system, because the body is
00:24:06.500 --> 00:24:12.299 Don St John: approximately 65 to 75% liquid.
00:24:12.450 --> 00:24:13.700 Don St John: Yes, thanks.
00:24:13.800 --> 00:24:14.820 Don St John: And
00:24:14.890 --> 00:24:20.940 Don St John: speaking of the heart, I see the heart as the center of that fluid system.
00:24:21.566 --> 00:24:25.010 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: It's the main pump. Right? It's what what? Circulates the blood.
00:24:25.010 --> 00:24:42.399 Don St John: Yeah. And it's so much more than just a pump. You know it. It's it's a filter. It it filters in and out, you know experiences that are consistent with our belief system.
00:24:42.410 --> 00:24:45.109 Don St John: It's to transmitter.
00:24:45.671 --> 00:24:59.448 Don St John: You know, the the vibrations or the information from my heart can reach across a room and affect somebody 1012 feet away from me.
00:25:00.280 --> 00:25:09.519 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: That's from the I remember the Heart Math Institute. They were the 1st ones to really measure the electromagnetic field of the heart and found it's actually bigger than the brain.
00:25:09.850 --> 00:25:12.940 Don St John: Actually bigger than the brain, exactly.
00:25:13.020 --> 00:25:28.239 Don St John: much bigger, much bigger, much stronger than the brain. So I came to realize over time that my body needed to be addressed for healing, to take hold.
00:25:28.650 --> 00:25:29.120 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: You're right.
00:25:29.120 --> 00:25:33.169 Don St John: That it was. It was critical. Now.
00:25:33.200 --> 00:25:35.769 Don St John: when we talk about the body.
00:25:35.910 --> 00:25:40.870 Don St John: and and this is something that may be a little challenging
00:25:41.100 --> 00:25:47.589 Don St John: to comprehend, but I think it's important. There was a man named Thomas Hanna.
00:25:48.060 --> 00:25:50.579 Don St John: he he was a philosopher.
00:25:51.227 --> 00:25:59.369 Don St John: He brought a man named Moshe Felding Christ to this country. You may have heard the Felden Christ method.
00:25:59.400 --> 00:26:04.549 Don St John: and then he developed his own, but he was originally a philosopher.
00:26:04.650 --> 00:26:07.259 Don St John: and he pointed out
00:26:07.580 --> 00:26:14.289 Don St John: that we talk about the body. That's a 3rd person thing.
00:26:16.150 --> 00:26:16.870 Don St John: Duh
00:26:16.970 --> 00:26:21.430 Don St John: body, the elbow, the shoulder, the heart.
00:26:21.430 --> 00:26:22.310 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Yeah, yeah.
00:26:22.310 --> 00:26:26.810 Don St John: Oh, but you and I don't experience that
00:26:26.870 --> 00:26:29.209 Don St John: what we experience
00:26:29.320 --> 00:26:35.590 Don St John: are the sensations and feelings and intentions, perhaps
00:26:36.040 --> 00:26:41.829 Don St John: the subjective side of the body.
00:26:41.840 --> 00:26:42.790 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Hmm.
00:26:42.790 --> 00:27:00.319 Don St John: And he said that you know so many of the problems that face us is out of the lack of realization, the absence of the comprehension that we have to evolve and develop
00:27:00.350 --> 00:27:13.829 Don St John: language, to enrich our own experience of life, our own experience of ourselves, our own experience of our relationships.
00:27:14.210 --> 00:27:15.420 Don St John: the again
00:27:15.550 --> 00:27:18.309 Don St John: our experience. So it's the.
00:27:18.310 --> 00:27:18.690 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Right.
00:27:18.700 --> 00:27:20.210 Don St John: Be inside.
00:27:20.760 --> 00:27:23.310 Don St John: I teach a method of
00:27:23.350 --> 00:27:28.779 Don St John: it's a movement meditation called continuum.
00:27:29.700 --> 00:27:42.499 Don St John: It was developed by a woman named Emily Conrad. And basically she asked the question, if the body is primarily water, how does water move.
00:27:42.980 --> 00:27:48.310 Don St John: and then she spent the rest of her life some 50, 60 years
00:27:48.610 --> 00:27:52.009 Don St John: in pursuit of the answer to that question.
00:27:52.450 --> 00:28:00.720 Don St John: and slowly and gradually being able to connect our consciousness
00:28:01.220 --> 00:28:04.500 Don St John: to the fluid level of our body.
00:28:04.970 --> 00:28:07.529 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Hmm! Oh, that's fascinating!
00:28:07.530 --> 00:28:18.119 Don St John: Yeah, it. It really is. Because, okay, let's go back to your blog and to the capacity to receive
00:28:19.000 --> 00:28:33.970 Don St John: right now, I will predict, I don't I? This is anecdotal. I don't have research evidence, but I have. You know, many decades of observations that people who are most tense
00:28:34.190 --> 00:28:36.630 Don St John: in their body who carry
00:28:36.650 --> 00:28:38.920 Don St John: chronic tension at an
00:28:38.980 --> 00:28:41.929 Don St John: high level in their body.
00:28:42.640 --> 00:28:43.530 Don St John: have
00:28:44.480 --> 00:28:48.280 Don St John: the least capacity to receive.
00:28:50.790 --> 00:28:56.150 Don St John: See, think about it. Water is the most receptive substance on earth.
00:28:56.630 --> 00:28:58.859 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:28:58.860 --> 00:28:59.670 Don St John: You're saying.
00:29:01.720 --> 00:29:03.669 Don St John: Is that making sense.
00:29:03.670 --> 00:29:07.730 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: For the 10 right cause. The tension is over. It's resistance right.
00:29:08.040 --> 00:29:08.490 Don St John: Yeah.
00:29:08.490 --> 00:29:10.959 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: When we tense up we resist
00:29:11.540 --> 00:29:13.769 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: what? What's around us.
00:29:14.040 --> 00:29:20.489 Don St John: Exactly. And and you know, we we block that fluid flow.
00:29:20.730 --> 00:29:26.259 Don St John: you know, like like a river that gets dammed up in places.
00:29:26.720 --> 00:29:28.040 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Hmm, hmm.
00:29:28.040 --> 00:29:31.759 Don St John: This is hard to get across in words.
00:29:32.220 --> 00:29:32.710 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Yeah.
00:29:33.281 --> 00:29:36.710 Don St John: You know, to go online and
00:29:36.720 --> 00:29:40.349 Don St John: watch some demonstrations of continuum.
00:29:40.970 --> 00:29:54.018 Don St John: One could go to the continuum Teachers association.com, and, you know, get a get a real sense of what that discipline is is about
00:29:54.550 --> 00:29:58.069 Don St John: but approaching only the body
00:29:58.620 --> 00:30:00.210 Don St John: is insufficient.
00:30:00.690 --> 00:30:05.480 Don St John: because we've got to deal with those beliefs
00:30:05.660 --> 00:30:10.789 Don St John: that you alluded to in your blog about. You know I'm not good enough.
00:30:11.450 --> 00:30:21.770 Don St John: I don't believe that I'm good looking, or I don't believe that I'm lovable or intelligent, and those beliefs need to be addressed.
00:30:22.050 --> 00:30:22.980 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Hmm, hmm.
00:30:22.980 --> 00:30:23.390 Don St John: And.
00:30:23.390 --> 00:30:23.840 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Yeah.
00:30:24.430 --> 00:30:28.180 Don St John: And then I talk about the 3rd leg of that
00:30:28.410 --> 00:30:32.109 Don St John: 4 pillars is, is our capacity
00:30:32.160 --> 00:30:38.170 Don St John: to be intimate in relationships to disclose ourselves.
00:30:38.380 --> 00:30:41.240 Don St John: Most of us are never taught
00:30:41.400 --> 00:30:47.460 Don St John: how to just tell the simple truth of our experience.
00:30:48.140 --> 00:30:48.620 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: You know.
00:30:48.620 --> 00:30:55.509 Don St John: No, the simple God! When when you raised your voice like that, it scared me.
00:30:56.108 --> 00:30:58.340 Don St John: which is that level
00:30:58.350 --> 00:31:02.570 Don St John: of truth and self disclosure
00:31:02.860 --> 00:31:08.230 Don St John: that's so important in an ongoing, intimate relationship.
00:31:08.920 --> 00:31:12.450 Don St John: And you know, my point of view, or my
00:31:12.490 --> 00:31:16.910 Don St John: belief is that the culture as a whole
00:31:17.100 --> 00:31:20.350 Don St John: has yet, you know to reach
00:31:22.560 --> 00:31:26.240 Don St John: intimacy as normative.
00:31:26.440 --> 00:31:33.650 Don St John: Now, I'd suggest that many, if not most, married couples
00:31:33.700 --> 00:31:38.099 Don St John: don't get to that depth of connection.
00:31:38.130 --> 00:31:40.849 Don St John: the level that's possible.
00:31:41.300 --> 00:31:50.120 Don St John: Yeah. They keep certain aspects of themselves hidden away and often hidden from themselves.
00:31:50.530 --> 00:31:51.500 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Hmm.
00:31:52.720 --> 00:31:56.229 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: very true, very true, because it's the
00:31:57.090 --> 00:32:10.500 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: to admit it to ourselves is is sometimes the scariest thing. If we can admit it to ourselves. Then we can admit it to our partners or to other people. Before we go to break. I just wanna ask you one quick question on the the.
00:32:10.520 --> 00:32:16.280 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: the fluid aspect of our bodies. I'm assuming you're familiar with the work of dramoto.
00:32:16.800 --> 00:32:17.520 Don St John: Yes.
00:32:18.666 --> 00:32:19.253 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: So
00:32:19.920 --> 00:32:22.609 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: you know, he did the experiments with sort of
00:32:22.970 --> 00:32:31.539 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: even just putting the a word on a piece of paper and wrapping it around a bottle of water would actually change the physical structure.
00:32:32.603 --> 00:32:34.590 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Do you
00:32:34.840 --> 00:32:43.010 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: do things that that you believe will help to change sort of the the underlying structure of your fluids. I guess.
00:32:43.010 --> 00:32:53.869 Don St John: Yeah, yeah, I mean, there are numerous things one is to not engage in, you know, to not cultivate negativity.
00:32:55.094 --> 00:33:11.339 Don St John: So something arises. I don't like it. I might feel annoyance or anger, but my practice is, let it go, let it go, return to equilibrium.
00:33:11.500 --> 00:33:23.970 Don St John: and then, if there's something that needs to be dealt with. Deal with it, but you know some. When I was young, I mean I I could keep a stream of negativity going, for, you know, hours.
00:33:23.970 --> 00:33:24.380 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Hmm.
00:33:24.380 --> 00:33:28.240 Don St John: And that's affecting the waters of the body.
00:33:28.926 --> 00:33:29.283 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Ma'am.
00:33:29.640 --> 00:33:30.310 Don St John: A.
00:33:31.310 --> 00:33:40.199 Don St John: In my practice I put sounds, different sounds into different areas of the body to to
00:33:40.700 --> 00:33:42.250 Don St John: stir the water.
00:33:42.550 --> 00:33:43.500 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Hmm, hmm.
00:33:43.500 --> 00:33:44.680 Don St John: To to
00:33:44.930 --> 00:33:50.729 Don St John: get the waters more animated, more alive. I'm moving better
00:33:52.650 --> 00:33:56.549 Don St John: So those are 2. I'm sure I could think of more
00:33:56.680 --> 00:34:04.259 Don St John: that in October I'm going to Lisbon, Portugal, to attend a conference on water.
00:34:04.870 --> 00:34:05.390 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Oh!
00:34:05.390 --> 00:34:11.639 Don St John: Some significant, very interesting findings that you know.
00:34:11.750 --> 00:34:18.250 Don St John: Emoto, I think, was the father of this research. But there's a lot more.
00:34:18.250 --> 00:34:19.420 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: It's happened since. Yeah.
00:34:19.420 --> 00:34:27.120 Don St John: There's a woman, I believe she's in Australia named Veda Austin, and she does similar things like that.
00:34:27.170 --> 00:34:47.150 Don St John: That Emoto does different along those lines, and I'm excited to learn. You know what what scientists are discovering about this medium that you know it's necessary for life. Yeah.
00:34:47.159 --> 00:34:52.689 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Okay, Le, let's take our next break. And when we come back I wanna ask you about your book
00:34:52.849 --> 00:35:07.007 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: kind of what was the impetus for that, and and and what the book is about, and then I do want to get into the spiritual side of these 4 pillars. We haven't gotten to that 4th pillar just yet. So I do want to get to that before the end of the show. Okay.
00:35:07.919 --> 00:35:18.099 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: awesome. So everyone, please stay tuned. You're listening to the conscious consult now, awakening humanity, and we'll be right back with our guest, Dr. Don St. John, in just a moment.
00:37:23.170 --> 00:37:30.490 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: So, Dr. Don, you wrote a book, the healing the Wounds of childhood. Well, when did you write that book? How long ago did it.
00:37:30.490 --> 00:37:34.399 Don St John: That one I wrote about 7 years ago.
00:37:35.017 --> 00:37:52.210 Don St John: It won an Award silver Medal, the Independent Book Publishers Association, and then I revised it a couple of years ago, and retitled it, healing the wounds of childhood and culture.
00:37:52.210 --> 00:38:08.390 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: And so what was what was the motivation behind writing this book? What was it that at this point in time, after so many years, you decided I'd really want to put pen to paper and or or fingers to keyboard and and get this story out there.
00:38:09.300 --> 00:38:11.359 Don St John: Well, you know I've
00:38:11.460 --> 00:38:25.450 Don St John: cultivated a very decent life. I feel blessed grateful. There have been miracles like could have been dead. I mean there's so many
00:38:25.670 --> 00:38:26.600 Don St John: up
00:38:26.960 --> 00:38:34.269 Don St John: difficulties that I encountered in the very early years of my life.
00:38:34.380 --> 00:38:43.330 Don St John: and to be able to do what I've done took a whole lot of effort over a long period of time.
00:38:43.390 --> 00:38:51.349 Don St John: I mean, I talk about being married for 40 years and having a wonderful marriage.
00:38:51.430 --> 00:39:00.389 Don St John: What I didn't mention is prior to that, I had 3 marriages and 3 divorces all in 12 years. So
00:39:00.750 --> 00:39:10.260 Don St John: yeah, I can see the expression on your face. It it's exactly that. You know I was a relational moron.
00:39:10.260 --> 00:39:10.870 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: But.
00:39:10.870 --> 00:39:13.800 Don St John: And back in my twenties. I you know.
00:39:15.016 --> 00:39:20.680 Don St John: all I saw was my parents fighting and cursing. And
00:39:21.500 --> 00:39:22.490 Don St John: so
00:39:22.750 --> 00:39:25.670 Don St John: that's where I started, and I thought, you know.
00:39:25.820 --> 00:39:27.529 Don St John: I've learned a lot.
00:39:27.830 --> 00:39:35.450 Don St John: and I and I think it'd be worth writing about, and maybe it could help some people.
00:39:35.590 --> 00:39:38.680 Don St John: And I think one of the things my book does
00:39:39.760 --> 00:39:50.649 Don St John: is that it helps people understand why they're having challenges in their life when they believe
00:39:50.710 --> 00:39:55.090 Don St John: that they had a quote unquote, normal childhood.
00:39:55.210 --> 00:40:05.400 Don St John: I can't tell you, Sam, how many times, and I'll bet your your wife can corroborate this as a psychotherapist.
00:40:05.690 --> 00:40:15.890 Don St John: you know a patient will come in and say, I don't understand why I have these relationship challenges. I had a very normal childhood.
00:40:15.890 --> 00:40:16.390 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Hmm, okay.
00:40:16.390 --> 00:40:28.190 Don St John: Okay, tell me about your normal childhood. Well, it was good, you know. We had dinner together all the time, and you know nobody beat me up. And
00:40:28.230 --> 00:40:33.589 Don St John: oh, yeah, my mom was depressed for the 1st 2 years of my life.
00:40:33.780 --> 00:40:40.719 Don St John: And yeah, my father liked to drink a lot on the weekends, and you know they'd go on and on
00:40:41.090 --> 00:40:44.569 Don St John: with these tails of pain.
00:40:44.870 --> 00:40:47.689 Don St John: and any child in that
00:40:48.160 --> 00:40:54.359 Don St John: situation would really feel the effects of what they're describing.
00:40:54.800 --> 00:40:57.919 Don St John: But then, you know, they normalize it.
00:40:58.160 --> 00:41:06.380 Don St John: construct coping mechanisms to live with it, and it all seems normal. My child would seem normal.
00:41:06.730 --> 00:41:13.729 Don St John: My mother, you know, took a swing at the back of my head at least once a day for years.
00:41:13.740 --> 00:41:18.869 Don St John: almost every day, and sometimes, you know, with wooden spoons and
00:41:19.130 --> 00:41:19.810 Don St John: sh
00:41:20.070 --> 00:41:20.575 Don St John: it.
00:41:21.480 --> 00:41:26.300 Don St John: But it seemed normal. I mean, you know, yeah. And.
00:41:26.450 --> 00:41:30.269 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: So what one of the things I've learned from my wife is that
00:41:30.280 --> 00:41:37.740 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: there are lots of traumas in our life, and I mean there are big traumas, big T. Travers, but there are also a lot of little T traumas, and sometimes.
00:41:37.740 --> 00:41:38.500 Don St John: Exactly.
00:41:38.500 --> 00:41:41.020 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: A lot of those little T traumas
00:41:41.280 --> 00:41:47.760 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: over a period of time add up to a much bigger effect on us than we realize than the big T traumas.
00:41:48.440 --> 00:41:49.720 Don St John: Exactly.
00:41:50.500 --> 00:41:51.490 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: So, so, okay.
00:41:51.490 --> 00:41:52.539 Don St John: Like what I mean.
00:41:52.540 --> 00:42:02.100 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: I. So I'm curious like with having worked with so many clients over the years, like wh. What kinds of multi traumas do you find people just
00:42:02.420 --> 00:42:06.069 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: ignore, but actually have a big impact on our live.
00:42:07.880 --> 00:42:12.049 Don St John: Well, how about, for example.
00:42:12.930 --> 00:42:15.370 Don St John: the subliminal
00:42:15.390 --> 00:42:18.519 Don St John: and and sometimes not so subtle
00:42:18.550 --> 00:42:20.100 Don St John: message
00:42:20.180 --> 00:42:25.290 Don St John: that sexuality is something to be hidden.
00:42:28.340 --> 00:42:30.630 Don St John: Or or
00:42:30.730 --> 00:42:33.330 Don St John: you know, in this family
00:42:33.660 --> 00:42:35.270 Don St John: we don't
00:42:35.410 --> 00:42:38.230 Don St John: express our vulnerability.
00:42:38.460 --> 00:42:41.810 Don St John: our fears, our sadness.
00:42:41.840 --> 00:42:47.204 Don St John: you know. Some people might say, that's not trauma. That's you know. That's how it should be.
00:42:49.110 --> 00:42:57.119 Don St John: But really or a little more obvious. How about the put downs that
00:42:57.200 --> 00:43:12.769 Don St John: some kids get, you know, on a kind of consistent basis. The message is that you know you're not. You're just not good enough, or you just don't try hard enough, or why can't you be like your brother, or you know
00:43:13.900 --> 00:43:16.289 Don St John: so many of those
00:43:18.290 --> 00:43:26.119 Don St John: not not explosive promise. I had them all. I had the big, big tease, the little tease.
00:43:26.320 --> 00:43:37.220 Don St John: You know my my father and I hardly spoke a thousand words, and all the years I was living with them. You know we we just didn't talk to each other.
00:43:37.220 --> 00:43:37.750 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Yeah.
00:43:37.750 --> 00:43:39.739 Don St John: And and when we did it
00:43:39.760 --> 00:43:48.840 Don St John: it had a little bit of a a snarl quality. So how do you characterize that big T little T
00:43:48.930 --> 00:43:51.270 Don St John: in between, you know.
00:43:51.270 --> 00:43:52.030 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Yeah.
00:43:52.240 --> 00:43:53.650 Don St John: There was no
00:43:53.990 --> 00:43:57.140 Don St John: father force in my life.
00:43:57.740 --> 00:44:03.719 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Yeah, I, I I in in some of the work that I do. We talk a lot about the fact that there's
00:44:03.870 --> 00:44:05.599 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: not a lot of
00:44:06.369 --> 00:44:17.529 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: balanced masculine energy out there. It it's it's either one extreme or the other. You don't see a lot of people that have a good balance.
00:44:18.874 --> 00:44:25.919 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Of of being sort of a masculine strong, but without being predatory.
00:44:26.310 --> 00:44:28.839 Don St John: Yeah, or rigid or hard.
00:44:29.030 --> 00:44:31.790 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Right, exactly, or or cold
00:44:32.617 --> 00:44:53.930 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: and and it's it's and and kind of now with the me, too, movement. It's almost going in the total opposite direction, where a lot of men are like even stifling their masculinity and and suffocating it because they feel guilty about all the horrors that women have suffered at the hands of men.
00:44:54.200 --> 00:45:02.209 Don St John: Exactly, exactly, and you know I see it as a swing of the pendulum. I think it will
00:45:02.230 --> 00:45:06.549 Don St John: find its way towards the center over time.
00:45:06.800 --> 00:45:09.950 Don St John: but I think it's reacting to
00:45:09.980 --> 00:45:13.439 Don St John: how it used to be in so many places.
00:45:13.440 --> 00:45:17.739 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Yeah, yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. Okay. We got one more break
00:45:18.370 --> 00:45:38.750 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: when we come back. I would like to talk about the the spiritual side of of your practice. And and you know, through all this trauma and through all this healing and working with so many people who've experienced so much trauma. How did you develop a spiritual practice? And and how did that come to inform the work that you do? Okay.
00:45:39.160 --> 00:45:39.850 Don St John: Okay.
00:45:39.850 --> 00:45:55.179 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: So if we don't have a lot of time left, but we'll get in there as much as we can. So everyone, please stay tuned. You're listening to the conscious consultant hour awakening humanity, and we'll be right back with our guest, Doctor Don St. John, to wrap it all up for you in just a moment.
00:48:02.400 --> 00:48:09.870 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: So so, Dr. Don, in in our path of healing. I I know it's it's fairly common that eventually we get to a place
00:48:11.118 --> 00:48:15.390 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: we're we're spirituality really informs our practice. But
00:48:15.800 --> 00:48:23.650 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: you know sometimes it can be hard, especially as a therapist. You're seeing clients who've experienced incredible trauma throughout their life.
00:48:23.840 --> 00:48:27.030 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: How were you able to sort of cultivate this.
00:48:27.570 --> 00:48:32.379 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: the spiritual pillar of these 4 pillars that that you you work with.
00:48:33.531 --> 00:48:43.639 Don St John: It's quite a long story. I'll be as succinct as I can. I know our time is limited. I was raised the Catholic.
00:48:43.640 --> 00:49:10.389 Don St John: and actually I was the most devout in my family. My parents and my brother didn't go to church. I went to Catholic school the whole 9 yards, and then, in late adolescence, I I moved in the direction of agnosticism, and by time I was in graduate school I was an atheist.
00:49:10.891 --> 00:49:22.420 Don St John: You know it's like science is real, and all that other stuff is simply not real. So why bother it's a consolation, a solace
00:49:22.490 --> 00:49:29.989 Don St John: for human beings who, you know it's hard to face our our mortality.
00:49:30.290 --> 00:49:33.019 Don St John: Then I took a psychedelic.
00:49:34.580 --> 00:49:40.390 Don St John: I took I I had an experience with Lsd.
00:49:40.600 --> 00:49:41.310 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Hmm.
00:49:41.310 --> 00:49:44.420 Don St John: When I was in graduate school with some of my
00:49:44.480 --> 00:49:45.920 Don St John: colleagues.
00:49:46.090 --> 00:49:48.670 Don St John: and it's hard to be an atheist
00:49:49.280 --> 00:49:49.970 Don St John: through that.
00:49:49.970 --> 00:49:50.520 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Yeah.
00:49:51.070 --> 00:50:00.229 Don St John: Really hard, because all of a sudden I realized that what my senses told me was real
00:50:00.330 --> 00:50:01.870 Don St John: was simply
00:50:02.040 --> 00:50:03.290 Don St John: partial.
00:50:04.180 --> 00:50:06.660 Don St John: Simply, you know.
00:50:06.730 --> 00:50:15.730 Don St John: So, for example, you look at a lawn and you see a bunch of grass, and you know that's what it is, it's grass.
00:50:17.230 --> 00:50:20.260 Don St John: When one puts his or her
00:50:20.300 --> 00:50:25.989 Don St John: face into that grass during an Lsd experience as I did
00:50:26.440 --> 00:50:34.699 Don St John: there was. It's a universe, I mean, it's alive. They're organisms, and they're moving and their colors and
00:50:34.760 --> 00:50:39.300 Don St John: oh, my God, I mean I had my head looking into the grass for an hour.
00:50:39.740 --> 00:50:42.030 Don St John: Least it felt that way.
00:50:42.140 --> 00:50:47.769 Don St John: and that was the beginning, you know. And then I had another experience
00:50:47.890 --> 00:50:53.759 Don St John: where I was at a conference 10 day residential workshop
00:50:54.130 --> 00:50:59.230 Don St John: where the focus was on the heart. The focus was.
00:50:59.380 --> 00:51:04.270 Don St John: you know, the topic was living from the heart center.
00:51:04.590 --> 00:51:06.090 Don St John: And
00:51:06.260 --> 00:51:09.250 Don St John: I want to make this as short as I can.
00:51:10.048 --> 00:51:17.589 Don St John: On the second day of the conference my wife calls, this is my way back. My second wife
00:51:17.780 --> 00:51:24.869 Don St John: call to tell me that she wanted an open relationship. And oh, by the way, she had already began.
00:51:28.750 --> 00:51:48.159 Don St John: and after lots and lots of empathy from the leader and the group. The next day the leader said, Okay, it's time to leave the emotional level of experiencing behind. We're going to the heart. If you can't make that leap. Go home.
00:51:48.590 --> 00:51:56.160 Don St John: I'm putting a long story in very short, and it was like, that's insane. How can I couldn't do it? That's impossible.
00:51:56.160 --> 00:51:56.750 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Hmm.
00:51:56.750 --> 00:52:10.970 Don St John: And I was extremely mad and extremely hurt. You know the grief, the anger coming out of me like never before, which in and of itself was healing. But but
00:52:11.030 --> 00:52:13.750 Don St John: by the end of the day my heart
00:52:13.880 --> 00:52:16.240 Don St John: seem to just open.
00:52:16.360 --> 00:52:18.780 Don St John: and I started feeling
00:52:18.870 --> 00:52:20.040 Don St John: love
00:52:20.200 --> 00:52:23.320 Don St John: for no particular person, place, or thing.
00:52:23.866 --> 00:52:27.409 Don St John: just love. And I was, you know.
00:52:27.590 --> 00:52:30.250 Don St John: boggled. I didn't understand it.
00:52:31.090 --> 00:52:34.809 Don St John: and it was a moment where I knew my life
00:52:35.470 --> 00:52:36.990 Don St John: had turned around.
00:52:37.890 --> 00:52:42.660 Don St John: And from that moment I continue to pursue
00:52:42.680 --> 00:52:45.010 Don St John: spiritual paths.
00:52:45.360 --> 00:52:46.100 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Hmm.
00:52:46.100 --> 00:52:53.440 Don St John: The Unity Church for a time a Guru for a time, and for the past 30 years
00:52:53.490 --> 00:52:56.130 Don St John: a Brazilian
00:52:58.910 --> 00:53:02.430 Don St John: Syncretic, meaning different different
00:53:02.850 --> 00:53:06.219 Don St John: religions brought together in this case.
00:53:06.410 --> 00:53:08.389 Don St John: Christian and
00:53:09.340 --> 00:53:12.010 Don St John: Amazonian, from the Amazon.
00:53:12.964 --> 00:53:15.049 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Is this a Santa Dia church?
00:53:15.848 --> 00:53:26.209 Don St John: The unia, the vegetal, which is the second biggest such church in Brazil and in 11 countries now.
00:53:26.440 --> 00:53:38.080 Don St John: and when you refer to my title. There's mess. Today. I've I've been, you know, a teacher in that church now for
00:53:38.270 --> 00:53:41.280 Don St John: some 14 years.
00:53:41.300 --> 00:53:44.220 Don St John: and it's it's been.
00:53:44.490 --> 00:53:58.189 Don St John: It's been an important part of my life, and let me say that each of those aspects the somatic, the psychological, and relational. You know, I break those down
00:53:58.390 --> 00:54:02.959 Don St John: for pedagogic reasons, that is to teach, but
00:54:03.060 --> 00:54:05.170 Don St John: they're not in in.
00:54:05.170 --> 00:54:05.570 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Yes.
00:54:05.570 --> 00:54:11.039 Don St John: My experience. They're all very highly related.
00:54:11.340 --> 00:54:16.069 Don St John: And it's towards, you know, recognizing we are connected.
00:54:16.320 --> 00:54:18.090 Don St John: Yeah, we are.
00:54:18.350 --> 00:54:26.469 Don St John: We're connected to the divine. We're connected to each other. We're connected to nature.
00:54:27.010 --> 00:54:33.489 Don St John: We're we're all part of life. And let me say one thing about that that
00:54:34.070 --> 00:54:39.209 Don St John: I I'm beginning to suspect that water water
00:54:39.390 --> 00:54:44.580 Don St John: is a major part of the medium of that connection.
00:54:45.536 --> 00:54:47.880 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: I see, I see.
00:54:48.490 --> 00:55:12.087 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Yes, and and I've had many guests on my show. It's really quite fascinating. I had a woman on my show a couple of months ago, who is a spiritual teacher, and it all started with an Lxd. Experience in the seventies, and and she no longer does it, but it brought her to meditation, and her meditation practice took a very deep, and now she's a a teacher, and she teaches different forms of yoga
00:55:12.760 --> 00:55:19.200 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: So it's quite interesting to me always about how psychedelics and plant medicine
00:55:19.340 --> 00:55:43.619 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: can really open us up to something that's inherent inside of us, and I think this is something that the indigenous cultures have preserved for generations, and and they were persecuted for it. But, thank God, they they survive, and I and I've heard I've I've read articles even like they found, ergo, the the mold that grows on rye that Lsd comes from in some ancient vases in Greece.
00:55:43.680 --> 00:55:47.991 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: So it's it's quite possible that the the
00:55:50.584 --> 00:55:57.490 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: ambrosia that they they speak about in ancient Greek myths was actually a a psychedelic brew
00:55:58.342 --> 00:56:04.670 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: but but that sense of oneness that comes from that, that sense of interconnection.
00:56:04.890 --> 00:56:09.569 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: that sense of yeah, like, we're not separate from nature. It's so
00:56:10.040 --> 00:56:22.210 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: fascinating how in modern times we've striven so hard to separate ourselves from nature. And now look what nature is is doing, it's it's it's
00:56:22.310 --> 00:56:25.179 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: becoming more extreme
00:56:25.330 --> 00:56:28.299 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: to kind of wake us up that like, hey.
00:56:28.530 --> 00:56:30.559 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: there is no separation.
00:56:31.650 --> 00:56:38.660 Don St John: I like that. I like that idea of nature wanting to wake us up.
00:56:39.360 --> 00:56:40.949 Don St John: You know that
00:56:42.090 --> 00:56:43.420 Don St John: we're part of it.
00:56:43.730 --> 00:56:47.988 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Yeah, yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. So.
00:56:48.900 --> 00:56:53.594 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: dr, Don, I I could talk to you all day long. Would definitely.
00:56:54.335 --> 00:56:54.740 Don St John: Sam.
00:56:54.800 --> 00:57:06.329 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Definitely a kindred spirit. If if anybody wants to learn more about your work or your teachings, is there a website they can go to? How would they find out more about you?
00:57:06.790 --> 00:57:14.470 Don St John: Yes, my website is Www. Pat, sub connection.
00:57:14.600 --> 00:57:24.890 Don St John: PATH SOFC. Dash, ON dash, EC dash, t dash, I dash on.com.
00:57:24.890 --> 00:57:35.310 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Wonderful, wonderful. And and I I know you said you're only doing about 40% of a full practice. Do you still teach? Do you do you work with people in different ways.
00:57:35.310 --> 00:57:37.269 Don St John: Yeah, teach continuum.
00:57:37.470 --> 00:57:38.790 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Okay. Wonderful.
00:57:38.790 --> 00:57:43.459 Don St John: Continuum. And Yup, that's on the website as well.
00:57:43.750 --> 00:57:52.519 Don St John: And I encourage people to seek out other continuum teachers. My workshops tend to be full.
00:57:52.520 --> 00:57:53.070 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Hmm.
00:57:53.656 --> 00:58:12.420 Don St John: But there are lots of teachers to who teach online since the pandemic. It's now possible to take continual workshops on Zoom. So it it opens the possibility for more people.
00:58:12.420 --> 00:58:13.586 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Wonderful, wonderful!
00:58:14.890 --> 00:58:20.110 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Do you have a last message? You would like to leave our audience with something worth
00:58:20.190 --> 00:58:25.269 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: and some some words of encouragement for the future. And then these very turbulent times.
00:58:26.240 --> 00:58:38.450 Don St John: Yeah, I the the message I like to leave folks with is embark on this journey. This adventure of a lifetime.
00:58:39.240 --> 00:58:40.999 Don St John: Stay the course.
00:58:41.170 --> 00:58:46.649 Don St John: really understand what it means to be in this body.
00:58:46.730 --> 00:58:57.900 Don St John: because, no matter how traumatized and mine was at towards the extreme. There's a spark of light and a flow
00:58:58.340 --> 00:59:02.290 Don St John: that's never extinguished completely.
00:59:02.290 --> 00:59:03.180 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Room.
00:59:03.800 --> 00:59:08.549 Don St John: Never extinguished, find it cultivated.
00:59:08.850 --> 00:59:10.290 Don St John: grow it.
00:59:10.290 --> 00:59:10.690 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Be.
00:59:10.690 --> 00:59:11.510 Don St John: Come in!
00:59:11.890 --> 00:59:20.209 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Beautiful, beautiful. And before we end the show I see there's a comment on our our Youtube channel from one of our loyal listeners. It says healed
00:59:20.770 --> 00:59:22.970 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: is when you react calm
00:59:23.000 --> 00:59:25.589 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: to stress that would normally upset you.
00:59:27.150 --> 00:59:27.940 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Nope, that.
00:59:27.940 --> 00:59:28.270 Don St John: Oh no!
00:59:28.270 --> 00:59:28.660 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Good, good.
00:59:28.660 --> 00:59:30.010 Don St John: Good thought, that's it.
00:59:30.010 --> 00:59:51.890 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Good one. Alright. Well, thank you, Dr. Don, for taking time to come on our show today. I truly appreciate you and the work that you do. And and you've given me. I I'm gonna have to go through the show notes after the fact to look at some of the teachers you refer to, and some of the people you refer to, so thank you for the work that you do, and for for all that you contribute to the world.
00:59:55.160 --> 00:59:57.390 Don St John: I'm taking that moment to feel your
00:59:57.530 --> 00:59:58.960 Don St John: compliment.
00:59:59.310 --> 00:59:59.850 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Good, thank.
00:59:59.850 --> 01:00:02.389 Don St John: You. It's really a pleasure to talk to you, Sam.
01:00:02.530 --> 01:00:25.099 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Thank you. Thank you. And of course, thank you, my loyal listeners, for tuning in each week. Without you there is no show. So thank you all for tuning in don't forget following this show. It's Doctor Richard Lewis Miller. We air his show mind, body, health, and politics followed later today, at 5 pm. Eastern, with Frank Harrison. Show Frank about health.
01:00:25.605 --> 01:00:30.659 Sam Liebowitz | The Conscious Consultant Hour: Thank you all for tuning in. Take care we will talk to you all next week.
Talking Alternative Broadcasting
392 Central Park West Suite 17R - New York, NY 10025
Privacy Policy · Terms & Conditions
Thank You for Visiting TALKRADIO.NYC © 2022.
