[NEW EPISODE] You Get What You Focus On

Positive Psychology techniques to support emotional wellbeing.

Research has shown that anxiety impacts 50% of women who experience menopause. Often this can show up as a lack of confidence, avoidance, social anxiety, loss of self-belief, and minimizing self at work. At this stage of life what you really want is to create momentum towards a more fulfilling and healthier mindset. 

My Guest this week, Sara Utley, is the founder of ‘Momentm’ - where women can access accelerated self-discovery and growth through coaching. Sarah specializes in mental health coaching through perimenopause, exploring issues such as confidence, self-esteem, identity, and purpose. She will be sharing with us her own experiences of early menopause and positive psychology tools and techniques to support emotional wellbeing. 

Sarah Utley 

LinkedIn: Sarah Utley  

Instagram: @sarahutley8

Apple Podcast: https://lnkd.in/edpXMpTE

Youtube: Sarah Utley - Momentm Coaching 

Join me for this essential conversation at TalkRadio.nyc or watch the Facebook Livestream by Clicking Here.

Show Notes

Segment 1

Segment 2‍

Segment 3

Segment 4

Transcript

00:00:56.130 --> 00:01:11.610 Pat Duckworth: Welcome to the hot women rock radio show empowering women leaders at menopause welcome and good morning, if you are in America Good afternoon, if you are in England and Europe, good evening, if you are in India and even further east.

00:01:12.090 --> 00:01:18.720 Pat Duckworth: So, last week I was broadcasting to you from the beautiful Mediterranean island of New York, where I was staying with my.

00:01:19.080 --> 00:01:34.290 Pat Duckworth: Colleague and sometimes co also K Newton which was fabulous we love catching up and also I got to meet jack Perez, who is the founder of cool life that's Qu E ll we all work in this area of helping women at midlife.

00:01:34.680 --> 00:01:41.010 Pat Duckworth: we're all worth looking up and seeing what we're up to today I am back in the UK it's a beautiful day here.

00:01:41.490 --> 00:01:51.300 Pat Duckworth: And the great thing is I love traveling I love coming home and there's nothing better really the being happy to come home and see what your gardens been up to in your absence.

00:01:51.720 --> 00:02:02.070 Pat Duckworth: and see what's growing and what Mother Nature is doing for you my guest today is Sarah utley will be coming to Sarah shortly, but let's have a look at what's been in the media about multiples.

00:02:02.430 --> 00:02:14.130 Pat Duckworth: is still a frenzy out there of everybody commentating on everything, in fact, there was an article in the spectator magazine here in the UK saying, have we hit peak force.

00:02:15.660 --> 00:02:28.350 Pat Duckworth: Is it too much now everybody's saying something about it, but at least we have broken the subject out of the cupboard so that's great So my first item i'm reaching behind me for an actual newspaper.

00:02:29.730 --> 00:02:37.260 Pat Duckworth: which was an article in the Guardian at the weekend women to be offered a new tablet on the NHS for fibroid symptoms.

00:02:37.830 --> 00:02:50.550 Pat Duckworth: Thousands of women with fibroids in England, Wales, ought to be offered in you tablet to ISA symptoms, as an alternative to injections or surgery often this ends up with a hysterectomy so it's great news if there's new treatment.

00:02:50.940 --> 00:02:58.170 Pat Duckworth: fibroids or non cancerous growth that develop in or around the womb, about one in three women develop them at some point in their lives.

00:02:58.530 --> 00:03:08.280 Pat Duckworth: They must often they most often occur in those age 30 to 50 symptoms can include prolonged and heavy menstrual bleeding pelvic pain and pressure on fertility problems.

00:03:08.610 --> 00:03:13.500 Pat Duckworth: There are limited long term treatment options that's why often ends up in hysterectomy.

00:03:14.280 --> 00:03:30.480 Pat Duckworth: Once you hit men or pause the dropping the level of estrogen means that fibroids tend to shrink, but some women can't wait that long because they're in pain and discomfort the National Institute for health and care excellence, as recommended that.

00:03:32.100 --> 00:03:39.900 Pat Duckworth: I always get stuck with a word, who knows what how you say this word religulous looks really good mix it.

00:03:40.410 --> 00:03:52.020 Pat Duckworth: With extra dial and another stuff also called something else I can't pronounce be offered on the NHS in final draft guidance about 4500 women will be eligible.

00:03:52.320 --> 00:03:59.580 Pat Duckworth: That is really important, because women of color tend to have a higher incidence of thought of.

00:04:00.390 --> 00:04:05.670 Pat Duckworth: fibroids and that's in the that's, not just in the UK America has the same issue.

00:04:05.970 --> 00:04:20.700 Pat Duckworth: Women of color tend to get worse treatment from the health system and end up having more hysterectomy with the health problems that can come after that so it's great news, if there is a new treatment for it but doesn't involve surgery.

00:04:21.360 --> 00:04:35.130 Pat Duckworth: What else is there, I think, global this week the times of Israel, and this is a subject i've never talked about before to save lives doctors should ask postmenopausal women if they snow, yes, I do.

00:04:36.630 --> 00:04:40.500 Pat Duckworth: Some of the women that are shared rooms with at conferences will be oh yeah that's Nice.

00:04:41.010 --> 00:04:50.040 Pat Duckworth: There is a massive phenomenon of undetected sleep apnea among women, according to a peer reviewed study published in the journal of clinical medicine.

00:04:50.640 --> 00:04:55.320 Pat Duckworth: Its most common among postmenopausal women in juice by hormonal changes.

00:04:55.860 --> 00:05:04.080 Pat Duckworth: Given that sleep apnea can be a serious sleep disorder in which breathing repeatedly stops and starts, causing illness and in some places death, this is worrying.

00:05:04.650 --> 00:05:11.850 Pat Duckworth: sleep apnea can lead to adverse medical conditions such as cardiovascular events, hypertension, heart attack and stroke.

00:05:12.600 --> 00:05:27.060 Pat Duckworth: doctor Professor eli of the Tel Aviv university was a dental professor at an expert and sleep disturbance found that one in 10 women aged 55 plus who snore developed sleep apnea many more than among younger women.

00:05:27.690 --> 00:05:33.030 Pat Duckworth: So if you're asked if you snore don't be coy you do talk to your doctor about it.

00:05:34.380 --> 00:05:44.670 Pat Duckworth: The lab blog posts shows impact of menopause and other health issues on older women sex life, despite stereotypes, the country many older women have active.

00:05:45.090 --> 00:05:56.580 Pat Duckworth: sex life into their 70s, a new poll shows, but health concerns, including medical symptoms often get in the way of intimacy according to the new results from the University of Michigan.

00:05:58.830 --> 00:06:11.370 Pat Duckworth: Even so, only 44% of women with menopausal symptoms have discussed treatment with a health care provider among those who did receive treatment 88% felt their symptoms were managed somewhat of very well.

00:06:12.000 --> 00:06:19.350 Pat Duckworth: Meanwhile we've been over 50 who have other health issue or who say their mental or physical health of fair or poor.

00:06:19.770 --> 00:06:25.020 Pat Duckworth: Self reported or, more likely for less satisfaction with sex lives.

00:06:25.470 --> 00:06:38.040 Pat Duckworth: Women over 50 who experienced mentors poor symptoms other health concerns that interfere with sexual activity should absolutely speak up to their health care providers and find out what their options might be.

00:06:38.460 --> 00:06:44.010 Pat Duckworth: Yes, indeed again because we've talked about the snoring thing you can talk about six things as well.

00:06:45.480 --> 00:06:58.320 Pat Duckworth: An article from attitude, which has two days in it so tired he chewed publishes ground breaking research or menopause and ADHD for women's mental health.

00:06:58.950 --> 00:07:17.250 Pat Duckworth: and its first of a kind research published by attitude half of women with ADHD called memory problems and overwhelming life altering in their 40s and 50s 83% reported experiencing some ADHD symptoms, for the first time in perimenopause and menopause.

00:07:18.840 --> 00:07:36.960 Pat Duckworth: The survey of 1500 women reveals ADHD symptoms are most impactful and life altering during menopause the survey responses augment our feature article in on ADHD symptoms and treatments by neuropsychologist Jeanette was a Stein.

00:07:38.490 --> 00:07:49.650 Pat Duckworth: They plan to use the survey data and participants as a launching pad for the first scientific research today are menopausal women with ADHD both diagnosed and undiagnosed.

00:07:49.980 --> 00:08:04.860 Pat Duckworth: i'm seeing much more now about ADHD and women at menopause I hope this isn't a medicalization of something that just happens with our hormones, but if it's actually recognizing something that is affecting women then it's really important.

00:08:05.880 --> 00:08:12.390 Pat Duckworth: The quality of stories and experiences submitted to attitude survey respondents were no less staggering or important.

00:08:12.690 --> 00:08:26.070 Pat Duckworth: Brain fog became unmanageable wrote 145 year old mother who entered perimenopause age 41 distractibility increased my inability to complete work tasks in an appropriate amount of time decrease.

00:08:26.370 --> 00:08:35.910 Pat Duckworth: I began spending all night working just keep her things that I used to have unconscious strategies to deal with we're no longer manageable, so this can be really serious.

00:08:37.350 --> 00:08:39.420 Pat Duckworth: Moving on then to be.

00:08:41.850 --> 00:08:53.670 Pat Duckworth: Letters page of the times now i'm sure this was in response to an article by India night, it says menopause is not only an illness in July is completely right about menopause mania.

00:08:54.360 --> 00:09:01.170 Pat Duckworth: yeah we're in menopause manian yes, the minerals can be unpleasant and in rare cases debilitating.

00:09:01.950 --> 00:09:08.130 Pat Duckworth: But in this completely normal phase of life is now being spoke about as a medical condition, it is not.

00:09:08.430 --> 00:09:14.820 Pat Duckworth: As a senior nursing general practice I find more and more of my time taken up with discussing and prescribing for the menopause.

00:09:15.120 --> 00:09:24.810 Pat Duckworth: hrt can be invaluable and I prescribe it, but thanks to celebrities or encourage all women to believe they're entitled to a completely symptom free and stress free life.

00:09:25.110 --> 00:09:31.680 Pat Duckworth: Our time is increasingly taken away from the diagnosis and treatment potentially serious illnesses.

00:09:32.580 --> 00:09:52.890 Pat Duckworth: i'm sorry it's not women fault it's not women's fault if the NHS doesn't have the resources that it needs and saying, well, we can't treat cancer patients and guilty women about it is not the answer don't be guilty into not seeking help if you need help them find it.

00:09:54.210 --> 00:10:07.230 Pat Duckworth: Stop background and the Daily Mail half of women who have been through the menopause kept it secret from their partners a poll of nearly 2000 women in the UK, I don't know all of these women are.

00:10:08.370 --> 00:10:11.940 Pat Duckworth: You keep answering polls, but good on them for their patients.

00:10:13.170 --> 00:10:18.960 Pat Duckworth: found that a fifth did not tell anyone at first and 43% felt completely alone.

00:10:19.470 --> 00:10:33.720 Pat Duckworth: Only to intend confided in a female relative and 77% didn't even tell their mothers at first and majority did not open up to friends, more than three quarters didn't consult a health professional the pole found.

00:10:34.320 --> 00:10:48.630 Pat Duckworth: But on the positive side, almost half appreciated postmenopausal benefits such as an end to periods or PMs and no sanitary products are further for intent enjoyed having sex without worrying about contraception.

00:10:49.080 --> 00:11:01.290 Pat Duckworth: let's talk about the positive it's important to our mental health, to understand that there are positives, this is a transition and you come to the other side of it, Sarah What did you make my news report.

00:11:02.730 --> 00:11:22.260 Sarah Utley: I find that incredibly interesting but also it correlates to the data that the full set society put together for the recent divina McCall program sex mind in the medicals they surveyed 4000 women for that program and.

00:11:23.910 --> 00:11:45.450 Sarah Utley: Women and most likely to say they find sleeping challenging them brain fog and then anxiety and depression and people don't tell other people what they're going through and one of the statistics was the people who have taken time off at work, because of men nepal's.

00:11:46.860 --> 00:11:53.550 Sarah Utley: 39% of them cited anxiety and depression is the reason on their sick note, rather than manacles.

00:11:53.850 --> 00:12:01.980 Sarah Utley: yeah so I completely it completely resonates what you're saying, and it can be an incredibly lonely experience for a lot of women, but it doesn't need to be.

00:12:02.370 --> 00:12:04.230 Sarah Utley: Your that's why you and I do what we do.

00:12:04.980 --> 00:12:15.090 Pat Duckworth: Absolutely, and we need to understand that it is a transition and there are positive see other side of it, I think that can be the message that gets lost in the middle.

00:12:15.660 --> 00:12:22.830 Pat Duckworth: but also this thing of kind of you know, women are sort of finally putting their heads up saying yes, this is a thing and then.

00:12:23.370 --> 00:12:30.600 Pat Duckworth: it's not always the men who are the ones going i'll stop talking about it sometimes it's about women, instead of like.

00:12:31.020 --> 00:12:42.510 Pat Duckworth: Accepting and helping each other Now I know it sells newspapers it sells magazines, if you can get a different point of view and somebody saying oh what's it all about, we should stop talking about it.

00:12:42.990 --> 00:12:57.690 Pat Duckworth: Well, I think, as women we've got a duty to help each other, not go Oh, why are you looking for treatment and it's your fault there's we've got HR tea shortages it doesn't make any sense to me I don't know about you.

00:12:58.560 --> 00:13:00.360 Sarah Utley: know I agree okay great.

00:13:00.840 --> 00:13:04.830 Pat Duckworth: yeah it's it's just it's not fair and sometimes.

00:13:05.220 --> 00:13:15.600 Pat Duckworth: You know, it happens in the workplace as well that women are afraid to speak up perhaps they've got a manager who's a man who's very understanding that we might have women colleagues who go.

00:13:15.930 --> 00:13:27.720 Pat Duckworth: Oh, we should talk about it, you know and it just really annoys me because I think, whatever the issue is, we should say well what's going on, how can we help, how can we support.

00:13:28.140 --> 00:13:48.360 Pat Duckworth: And the other thing I thought was interesting was that we have that bit about women sex lives during menopause and then we read about sleep and anxiety and stress, so if you're thinking Oh well, you know not wanting sex at this stage of life is just down to the menopause look at everything.

00:13:49.680 --> 00:14:03.750 Pat Duckworth: If you've got somebody who isn't sleeping well who doesn't feel she can talk about it and he's feeling anxious got stress at work and at home it's not exactly the cocktail for having a really active sex life is it.

00:14:04.620 --> 00:14:06.990 Sarah Utley: I think, sex, will be the last thing on your mind.

00:14:07.380 --> 00:14:09.750 Sarah Utley: yeah good night's sleep and a hot water bottle.

00:14:11.370 --> 00:14:13.590 Pat Duckworth: Coffee good pillow.

00:14:15.810 --> 00:14:21.060 Pat Duckworth: would be very good, not the same sex isn't a good thing it's a good thing you'll feel.

00:14:22.110 --> 00:14:40.080 Pat Duckworth: Your confidence your self esteem it's a whole bunch of stuff but if you're tired it's probably very low down on your shopping list so join us after the break when I will be talking to Sarah and we'll be talking more about how anxiety can affect your medical see after the break.

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00:16:53.010 --> 00:16:59.790 Pat Duckworth: Welcome back to the hot women rock radio show and empowering women leaders at menopause where my guest today is Sarah.

00:17:00.750 --> 00:17:06.180 Pat Duckworth: Sarah is the founder of momentum that's without a so its momentum.

00:17:06.840 --> 00:17:20.220 Pat Duckworth: Where women can access accelerated self discovery and growth through coaching Sarah specializes in mind health coaching through perimenopause exploring issues such as confidence self esteem identity and purpose.

00:17:20.670 --> 00:17:30.870 Pat Duckworth: Sarah is passionate about giving a voice to women in work experiencing multiples supporting organizations to create a culture where conversations about menopause are normalized.

00:17:31.380 --> 00:17:42.660 Pat Duckworth: sarah's career has been spent as a professional engine in human in human resources, running a successful business offering people and culture expertise through periods of reorganization.

00:17:43.110 --> 00:18:01.950 Pat Duckworth: disruption and change, there is no honestly and empathy or dislike of office politics anybody likes that although some people indulgent routing and procrastination and her passion for learning and feline friends Sarah how many feeling, for instance.

00:18:03.480 --> 00:18:10.320 Sarah Utley: i've only got one, but I aspire to more once enough to be fair, I don't think I could cope with the amount of CAP for.

00:18:12.690 --> 00:18:31.530 Pat Duckworth: know that is the sales side of currencies we continuous CAP for issue I think i'm still scraping up off the carpet some years after my last cat left us anyway me ma Sarah tell us a bit about your early career, then, did you go straight into hr.

00:18:33.120 --> 00:18:38.640 Sarah Utley: And I left university and I just got any job I could find.

00:18:39.810 --> 00:18:49.530 Sarah Utley: And I noticed that HR reported into finance and it wasn't done particularly well and I was a bit arrogant.

00:18:50.670 --> 00:18:59.910 Sarah Utley: And I thought you know I could do so much better than that I just why is people always work people always report into finance in the small businesses.

00:19:00.360 --> 00:19:11.250 Sarah Utley: So maybe go to night school I did my COPD qualification and I wanted to get into HR and I came up to London to recruitment fair amount a lovely guy.

00:19:12.720 --> 00:19:27.000 Sarah Utley: At titan law sugars in East end of London, we had a chat he said come up have an interview and that's how I landed my first job in HR and for the past 24 years I have spent my career in human resources.

00:19:27.690 --> 00:19:31.050 Pat Duckworth: Yes, what do you particularly like about that kind of work.

00:19:34.800 --> 00:19:47.100 Sarah Utley: When I do interim, so there are 16 years i've been running my own business and i've been doing interim so I guess it's the variety and I enjoy project work.

00:19:48.390 --> 00:19:59.790 Sarah Utley: I do lots of stuff on change transformation org design restructured offshoring outsourcing it's the opportunity to influence strategy to work with senior execs.

00:20:00.180 --> 00:20:12.990 Sarah Utley: And also support them on how they think and how they show up and that's something my coatings really helped with and I often work with leaders on what's the shadow you want to cast as a leader Hydra what what you want to be known for.

00:20:14.280 --> 00:20:17.520 Sarah Utley: And that helps people to think more intentionally about their behavior.

00:20:18.120 --> 00:20:18.960 Sarah Utley: yeah and.

00:20:19.020 --> 00:20:20.850 Sarah Utley: The traits that they want to develop.

00:20:22.170 --> 00:20:32.100 Pat Duckworth: To my last job in the civil service, I was, I was a director in a big government department and I don't need been there, a few months, and my boss.

00:20:33.300 --> 00:20:34.470 Pat Duckworth: I can't tell you anything.

00:20:37.500 --> 00:20:44.070 Pat Duckworth: I said to him, he said, oh you won't be having a formal appraisal because you've only been with us, three months.

00:20:44.610 --> 00:21:04.710 Pat Duckworth: So I said that's fine but i'd really like to know, some feedback how you think i'm doing, because this is a new role for me and he said boy you won't feel I said because i'd really like to know how you think i'm doing anyone okay well you're obviously could be with people, but so what.

00:21:05.790 --> 00:21:07.050 Pat Duckworth: Is a manager.

00:21:09.540 --> 00:21:11.190 Sarah Utley: What Oh, my goodness.

00:21:11.850 --> 00:21:25.140 Pat Duckworth: That gives you an idea of why I left the civil service, I thought I it's important to me that i'm good with people, and I support people in growth and development, and if that isn't valued what am I doing here but it's.

00:21:26.970 --> 00:21:30.810 Sarah Utley: Not just typifies the challenges that your House.

00:21:31.890 --> 00:21:42.420 Sarah Utley: With difficult conversations so feedback can be quite challenging for a lot of people, but if we struggle and giving feedback.

00:21:43.020 --> 00:21:53.430 Sarah Utley: Then, just imagine how challenging it is for a lot of people to have conversations about the medicals in the workplace, particularly if you're male and you have a team, full of women.

00:21:54.510 --> 00:21:58.800 Sarah Utley: If it's a challenge to have a difficult conversation then it's amplified even more.

00:22:00.150 --> 00:22:04.740 Sarah Utley: When thinking about having a conversation about something so personal and intimate as many apples.

00:22:05.580 --> 00:22:09.570 Pat Duckworth: Can you imagine we would have had a conversation with him about metaphors.

00:22:11.190 --> 00:22:20.400 Pat Duckworth: wasn't even a possibility, but I would have talked to her about that so that's why you know you do the work you do, and I do the work I do to say to men.

00:22:21.480 --> 00:22:28.170 Pat Duckworth: and women, and women in management roles we need to be able to talk about it and really to listen.

00:22:29.340 --> 00:22:37.680 Pat Duckworth: listen to what people got so anyway, moving on So why did you get your interest in what happens that perimenopause and menopause.

00:22:39.060 --> 00:22:56.940 Sarah Utley: My own personal experience of perimenopause so one in 100 women experienced manacles before the age of 40 and i'm the one in the hundred I started noticing changes in my mid 30s.

00:22:58.050 --> 00:22:58.890 Sarah Utley: and

00:23:01.320 --> 00:23:02.490 Sarah Utley: You know, first of all.

00:23:03.630 --> 00:23:21.420 Sarah Utley: It was weird periods, so I could go months without a period, and then it would just play like that, and I would have a period every other week or sometimes i'd only have 48 hours between periods, so that was completely out of work, and at the same time I develop.

00:23:22.920 --> 00:23:32.100 Sarah Utley: A growing sense of unease i'd wake up in the morning and I feel anxious, and I say to my husband, I feel really anxious, I have no idea why Why am I so anxious.

00:23:33.180 --> 00:23:35.910 Sarah Utley: And it played out in work.

00:23:37.050 --> 00:23:42.900 Sarah Utley: It was amplified at work and it played out in front of other people in a social setting.

00:23:43.950 --> 00:23:53.460 Sarah Utley: At works in meetings, if I had to present i've never been comfortable with speaking in front of huge numbers of people it's not something I enjoy doing.

00:23:54.240 --> 00:24:05.610 Sarah Utley: But i've not had a problem with it and yeah in my mid 30s it was like a click of a finger and I go into a meeting and I would start having.

00:24:06.780 --> 00:24:08.520 Sarah Utley: flight or fights and symptoms.

00:24:09.540 --> 00:24:31.080 Sarah Utley: Really really aggressive, to the point where i'd have to leave the room and make some excuse, and I would then develop really bad habits and patterns of avoidance yeah i'll try to minimize myself during meetings of doing anything I could to get out of doing and talking in front of people.

00:24:31.560 --> 00:24:36.960 Pat Duckworth: And was there any family history of perpetual menopausal was a did this come out and blue.

00:24:37.890 --> 00:24:49.710 Sarah Utley: came out to play my mom I think was late 40s so the typical age of medicals 51 that was her experience, so no no family history that i'm aware of.

00:24:50.280 --> 00:24:52.560 Pat Duckworth: So I think that's what saying Islam, but.

00:24:54.210 --> 00:25:04.770 Pat Duckworth: Depending on the statistics you look at sometimes they say 123 percent of women because other things like medical issues can come into play in it as well.

00:25:05.130 --> 00:25:18.840 Pat Duckworth: But it can just come out of the blue, no family history and suddenly you're experiencing symptoms and you're not sure what they are what eventually took you to see a doctor a medical practitioner.

00:25:20.130 --> 00:25:29.610 Sarah Utley: I think the the anxiety got to a point where I was just beginning to lose confidence in my ability, I was feeling really lonely and detached from life.

00:25:30.690 --> 00:25:49.290 Sarah Utley: And the periods were just something I just couldn't cope with I felt awful all of the time and I felt very alone because I saw people all around me who I felt were normal and confident or ease and I feel that way at all inside, so I reached out to my GP and I said.

00:25:50.310 --> 00:25:54.810 Sarah Utley: This is what's happening i've done some reading but i'd be going through the medicals.

00:25:55.830 --> 00:26:05.730 Sarah Utley: And they said you're far too young for that it's probably just stress and burnout you know go and get some cognitive behavioral therapy and I did.

00:26:06.420 --> 00:26:16.050 Sarah Utley: And it was helpful to understand my thinking patterns and my feelings my behavior but you know it continued.

00:26:16.950 --> 00:26:34.680 Sarah Utley: And so I went to seek professional help from a specialist and gynecologist and yeah I just all kind of came out in the room, with her, we talked about it and I started hrt and it's been game changing really for me.

00:26:35.130 --> 00:26:44.250 Pat Duckworth: yeah so that's The other thing to point out is often Again I say this every week i'm not bashing doctors because.

00:26:44.970 --> 00:26:57.720 Pat Duckworth: it's complicated and but often they don't have enough training in the subject, but you know your body better than anybody does, and if you go and seek advice and you're just dismissed.

00:26:58.920 --> 00:27:15.330 Pat Duckworth: then seek more advice, because you know what your body normally feels like and what your brain normally feels like now cpt can be really helpful and it has been shown in research, I don't know how many fail some women they talked about with that.

00:27:16.530 --> 00:27:25.410 Pat Duckworth: In research, the BT cognitive behavioral therapy when you look at your thoughts and behavior and how you can also have can be really helpful.

00:27:26.220 --> 00:27:33.330 Pat Duckworth: And you might need more help, particularly if you've gone into early moments menopause or premier Member pause.

00:27:33.990 --> 00:27:46.950 Pat Duckworth: Because you need to protect your bones and protect your health and it could be that hormone replacement therapy is essential because of the protective quality of it on your bones and.

00:27:47.760 --> 00:27:58.890 Pat Duckworth: On your hearts as well, so there's a lot to be said for that, so how many years, have you been experiencing symptoms before you actually got the diagnosis.

00:27:59.940 --> 00:28:02.040 Sarah Utley: Lee three four years.

00:28:02.700 --> 00:28:07.470 Pat Duckworth: yeah and did you have blood tests or saliva tests so.

00:28:08.130 --> 00:28:09.090 Sarah Utley: The tests.

00:28:09.750 --> 00:28:11.760 Sarah Utley: which are not especially accurate.

00:28:12.540 --> 00:28:16.050 Sarah Utley: And can fluctuate given what day of the month, it is.

00:28:17.520 --> 00:28:21.510 Sarah Utley: But yeah that that's that's how I got my diagnosis.

00:28:21.720 --> 00:28:32.370 Sarah Utley: yeah but I knew i'd by that point i'd done loads and loads of reading and looking back now and having read very widely on the topic of anxiety.

00:28:33.720 --> 00:28:36.780 Sarah Utley: I kind of have a scientific explanation for it.

00:28:36.840 --> 00:28:48.750 Sarah Utley: yeah called the HPA axis dysfunction and probably that's worth touching on at some point, because I needed to find a scientific explanation for what was happening to me and to name it.

00:28:49.170 --> 00:28:51.360 Sarah Utley: yeah by naming it I could understand it more.

00:28:51.900 --> 00:28:54.720 Pat Duckworth: yeah it's the i'm not going mad if.

00:28:55.200 --> 00:28:55.590 Sarah Utley: You know.

00:28:55.620 --> 00:29:04.980 Pat Duckworth: Some Personally, I am going mad, and then you get an exposure you go oh heavens i'm not going so many women think that they're getting outside demos.

00:29:05.010 --> 00:29:15.630 Pat Duckworth: And that's scary and it's good that you've touched on feeling lonely because we're still in mental health awareness month and the theme this year is about loneliness.

00:29:15.960 --> 00:29:20.880 Pat Duckworth: And we've even touched on it in the media reports of feeling of loneliness.

00:29:21.240 --> 00:29:30.570 Pat Duckworth: And if you're not talking about it with anybody and you're frightened and getting stressed by it then you're more likely to feel lonely so really important that you've touched on that.

00:29:31.050 --> 00:29:38.790 Pat Duckworth: Thank you right join us after the break when we'll be talking more about the solutions if you're feeling anxious that medical see you after the break.

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00:31:42.420 --> 00:31:50.940 Pat Duckworth: Welcome back to the hot women rock radio show empowering women leaders at nipples where my guest today is Sarah up the the founder of momentum.

00:31:51.780 --> 00:31:59.670 Pat Duckworth: And you've just been telling us before the break about your experience of early menopause now when you started to having those symptoms.

00:32:00.300 --> 00:32:11.190 Pat Duckworth: Had you already done your coaching training or was this before you did that so after you've done coaching what skills did that give you to help yourself and other women.

00:32:12.720 --> 00:32:13.650 Sarah Utley: What lovely question.

00:32:15.000 --> 00:32:15.390 Sarah Utley: well.

00:32:16.830 --> 00:32:20.460 Sarah Utley: I Ching gifts the skill of quietness.

00:32:21.750 --> 00:32:23.070 Sarah Utley: The ability to.

00:32:24.450 --> 00:32:32.820 Sarah Utley: Be more become more self aware and have a safe psychological psychologically safe space to think.

00:32:33.660 --> 00:32:46.860 Sarah Utley: And there's something about working with somebody else in that relationship that you build that provides the opportunity to think differently to examine things that could be challenging things are holding you back from achieving your goals.

00:32:48.090 --> 00:32:51.660 Sarah Utley: is certainly helped me find quiet time, find time for Greece.

00:32:53.220 --> 00:32:59.670 Sarah Utley: The journaling aspect or coaching has enabled me to just almost burp out my thoughts.

00:33:01.740 --> 00:33:13.680 Sarah Utley: On a daily basis and really examine why I feel the way I do and what I want instead and to take maximum control over how I feel and think.

00:33:14.220 --> 00:33:22.020 Sarah Utley: Man it's given me loads of tools and techniques to show up in a way that I feel confident and.

00:33:23.010 --> 00:33:39.330 Sarah Utley: You know, adds to my self esteem and I think those are the really important things to build up and to take control back when you're going through manacles because the spiking cortisol that you experienced during menopause can seriously impact, how you feel in your confidence levels.

00:33:40.620 --> 00:33:49.770 Pat Duckworth: So bit more about that chemically what's going on at menopause and before you do i'm just gonna say, but as a therapist in coach.

00:33:50.220 --> 00:34:03.090 Pat Duckworth: I still go for therapy and coaching because I need to say my stuff out loud sometimes just saying it out loud is part of the solution, and sometimes it's just having a sounding board.

00:34:03.780 --> 00:34:14.280 Pat Duckworth: To get that influence so there's so many benefits from being able to talk to somebody in a non judgmental space that somebody goes, you know what you should do you should you know and.

00:34:14.640 --> 00:34:29.970 Pat Duckworth: Oh, I don't know something you did that and they did this you just want somebody to listen, while you say your staff who then prompts you to help you to say what your solution is because your solution is your solution it's not anybody else.

00:34:31.290 --> 00:34:32.160 Pat Duckworth: Excellent now let's.

00:34:33.990 --> 00:34:37.050 Pat Duckworth: just say more about the chemical changes going on.

00:34:37.830 --> 00:34:43.050 Sarah Utley: yeah so I mentioned about the HPA access access dysfunction.

00:34:44.580 --> 00:34:51.810 Sarah Utley: And there's it there's three things involved in that and it's a basically a circuit of communication between the hypothalamus in the brain.

00:34:52.170 --> 00:34:59.520 Sarah Utley: The pituitary glands and the adrenal glands and when you've got that fluctuation in estrogen progesterone and testosterone.

00:35:00.360 --> 00:35:14.820 Sarah Utley: cortisol Spikes and it runs around that circuit and basically it's the stress hormone, and so it can make you feel anxious, it can make you feel depressed and it really impacts your ability to feel confident.

00:35:16.110 --> 00:35:26.580 Sarah Utley: And the interesting thing is the adrenal glands once the once the ovaries back up your adrenal glands are the main source of hormone production.

00:35:27.240 --> 00:35:40.410 Sarah Utley: And so, because your adrenal glands are so intimately involved in in that HPA axis and cortisol and how you feel feel it's really important to take control and to understand.

00:35:41.670 --> 00:35:48.360 Sarah Utley: You know how anxiety and stress shows up in me and what I can do, and some practical things.

00:35:49.020 --> 00:35:49.890 let's do it is.

00:35:51.270 --> 00:35:56.910 Pat Duckworth: A practical things because women listening go oh my God i'm experiencing that what can I do about it.

00:35:57.480 --> 00:36:01.950 Sarah Utley: wasn't very, very practical ones there's there's been a lot of theory around.

00:36:03.030 --> 00:36:16.470 Sarah Utley: pets and your interaction with your pet, the more you smoother pets the endorphins are released so that's the more happy chemical serotonin endorphins that you can get gardening.

00:36:17.490 --> 00:36:22.530 Sarah Utley: Talking about stuff that obviously causes you stress so cvt getting as much daylight.

00:36:24.240 --> 00:36:37.920 Sarah Utley: be really mindful of your diet in terms of caffeine and sugar intake yeah and anything that really makes you happy exercise is so important as well, and all those things combined just breaks that circuit.

00:36:39.540 --> 00:36:40.980 Sarah Utley: Along with meditation.

00:36:41.160 --> 00:36:50.010 Pat Duckworth: and say what would you say about meditation because that comes up so much, and I think for women can be really important.

00:36:50.760 --> 00:37:06.390 Sarah Utley: So meditation is wonderful I meditate regularly and it helps you catch those negative thoughts and have a choice and you realize that you're not your thoughts thoughts are like clouds they pass across your mind it's how you engage with them your choice about that.

00:37:07.590 --> 00:37:08.640 Sarah Utley: So it's very empowering.

00:37:09.030 --> 00:37:17.970 Pat Duckworth: But it's really important because i've had so many clients you got all my thoughts are driving me mad, and I say you know you don't have to think them don't you yeah.

00:37:19.170 --> 00:37:28.500 Pat Duckworth: I don't even know what you're talking about there, my thoughts I say yeah but your brain is just generating them all the time and it's up to you, which ones you spend time with.

00:37:30.270 --> 00:37:41.010 Pat Duckworth: So we have to kind of engage with what thoughts are there just random stuff your brain is saying what do you think about this when you think about this, what do you think about this, you don't have to spend time with it.

00:37:42.690 --> 00:37:52.950 Sarah Utley: I imagine it like a train coming into a train station and all my I have a choice about whether I step on to the the train whether I stay in on the platform.

00:37:53.280 --> 00:38:00.780 Sarah Utley: And all my thoughts are on the train and I can see the door shutting it goes out the platform and my thoughts are away because they don't define me.

00:38:01.170 --> 00:38:03.900 Sarah Utley: yeah and I don't have to get on that train and engage with them.

00:38:05.010 --> 00:38:15.060 Pat Duckworth: And the other bit of metaphor is you're not in control of what trains turn up at the station you're not you think you are.

00:38:15.810 --> 00:38:30.090 Pat Duckworth: But there's a whole other system that is sending the trains to the platform, and you have to go I didn't want to go to that destination, I won't get all that, and then the next train comes law it's an excursion it's going somewhere lovely get on it type of it.

00:38:31.290 --> 00:38:36.630 Pat Duckworth: So the nature of thought is so important, so in the work that you do.

00:38:37.710 --> 00:38:45.240 Pat Duckworth: How do you bring this idea of empowerment and the positivity of menopause into the people that you're talking to.

00:38:46.800 --> 00:38:47.940 Sarah Utley: Or rather than.

00:38:49.020 --> 00:38:59.520 Sarah Utley: It be something that happens to us, we can have a sense of agency over experience and feeling control and then kind of take back some power to thrive.

00:39:00.690 --> 00:39:12.420 Sarah Utley: And I worked with a lot of women who say they're exhausted, they come with low confidence they've lost their sense of identity and mid life is so fascinating because.

00:39:13.380 --> 00:39:25.020 Sarah Utley: Women wear so many different hats and confidence is often measured by other people's judgment of what good is, though, are you a good mom are you a good wife.

00:39:25.650 --> 00:39:43.080 Sarah Utley: Are you good at work, and that if you attach your identity to that, then it naturally knocks your self confidence and so during coaching we quieten down the mind and we explore judgment.

00:39:44.580 --> 00:39:46.620 Sarah Utley: And rot judgment of cell.

00:39:47.640 --> 00:40:09.750 Sarah Utley: And it can be really cathartic when you stop judging yourself and stop caring about how others judge you and I think the experience of manacles and what it brings the exhaustion the extreme fatigue it doesn't give you the space to pass so much about what other people think.

00:40:10.800 --> 00:40:12.960 Sarah Utley: And it gives you the opportunity to.

00:40:14.370 --> 00:40:27.750 Sarah Utley: be in control of your own destiny, going forward in your own identity, I work with women who look at photographs of themselves in the past, so I don't recognize that person anymore, and I say, well, what person, do you want to be in the.

00:40:27.750 --> 00:40:28.290 Pat Duckworth: Future.

00:40:28.530 --> 00:40:38.340 Sarah Utley: And it's about reef grief finding your passion and your purpose and your identity by quieting the mind down by dropping the judgment by thinking about.

00:40:39.480 --> 00:40:42.030 Sarah Utley: How we sabotage in our own minds.

00:40:43.890 --> 00:40:49.110 Sarah Utley: Breaking that down, you can have agency over the choices that you make.

00:40:50.040 --> 00:41:01.920 Pat Duckworth: really important, and I think this is a benefit of menopause that frequently isn't discussed is the other side of it is how many less you give about anything.

00:41:02.700 --> 00:41:11.400 Pat Duckworth: You know you get to a stage where somebody says oh I I wouldn't have worn that okay you don't worry i'm wearing it, you know or I wouldn't.

00:41:12.090 --> 00:41:24.450 Pat Duckworth: Have you had that hairstyle Okay, I thought i'd do it i'm enjoying it, you know there's so many things that suddenly you really care so much less about and because they're not important.

00:41:24.900 --> 00:41:35.400 Pat Duckworth: And, often because there are other people's stuff, I think, as you get older you realize it's not your stuff it's somebody else's when I was much younger somebody said to me.

00:41:35.700 --> 00:41:43.050 Pat Duckworth: What other people think about you isn't your business and I thought well that's not true because it's my business it's not like a business.

00:41:45.420 --> 00:41:47.520 Pat Duckworth: it's a real liberation, when you realize.

00:41:49.950 --> 00:41:51.750 Sarah Utley: He must if liberation.

00:41:52.620 --> 00:42:03.330 Pat Duckworth: Because it isn't your business they've come to their conclusion with little bits that they know about you and they've made a judgment that's their business it's not your business so.

00:42:03.990 --> 00:42:18.120 Pat Duckworth: How do you create the right atmosphere for those conversations about menopause either helping women to be good allies, or in the workplace, being a good ally what, what are the essential ingredients.

00:42:19.740 --> 00:42:23.280 Sarah Utley: Oh golly and being really.

00:42:24.600 --> 00:42:28.440 Sarah Utley: empathetic and you show your empathy through listening skills.

00:42:29.460 --> 00:42:42.240 Sarah Utley: As you said, coaching and any conversation around medicals is it requires great listening skills and space non judgmental space.

00:42:43.050 --> 00:42:59.100 Sarah Utley: and empowering the person you're speaking to to make the decisions for themselves there's nothing worse than you offering suggestions, because they're your suggestions they're not the person that you're speaking to suggestions and so it's about.

00:43:00.120 --> 00:43:13.020 Sarah Utley: shaking off your views and creating an opportunity for someone to bring that through authentic selves and stories without fear of repercussions.

00:43:14.190 --> 00:43:24.450 Sarah Utley: without fear of judgment and listen to them and ask those questions enable them to think for themselves and take the control back that they need.

00:43:25.440 --> 00:43:32.310 Pat Duckworth: yeah so important, but as a coach you're giving somebody control you're not taking it from them.

00:43:32.760 --> 00:43:46.740 Pat Duckworth: And also it's the ability to point people to resources as well in the workplace, I think you know I think some managers are frightened that they need to know everything there is to know about menopause in order to have the conversation no you don't.

00:43:47.940 --> 00:43:57.810 Pat Duckworth: Let that goes that's not a problem, but in the workplace, if you know where resources are and the person you're talking to have no idea where to look for help.

00:43:58.140 --> 00:44:03.600 Pat Duckworth: and pointing them towards resources is really important whether it's you know.

00:44:04.110 --> 00:44:15.360 Pat Duckworth: occupational health or there's an Internet site or this fact sheets, or you know this person really needs some help you're just pointing them in that direction and letting them find it.

00:44:15.930 --> 00:44:26.910 Pat Duckworth: This is all great advice Sarah amazingly we're coming up to the last quarter of the show we'll see you after the break for more amazing advice from Sarah up the see you after the break.

00:44:30.330 --> 00:44:39.510 www.TalkRadio.nyc: Everybody it's cami D, the non profit sector can actually coming at you from my attic each week here on talk radio dot nyc I hope program will advocate for.

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00:46:25.200 --> 00:46:35.580 Pat Duckworth: Welcome back to the hot women radio show and powering women leaders at manacles lots we can do to empower women leaders and we have empowering women leaders to talk to us.

00:46:36.270 --> 00:46:51.960 Pat Duckworth: Sarah we started talking about some of the things that women can do and how to have those conversations in the workplace and outside the workplace as well, so what's The one thing women can do to improve their lives, what tools can I use.

00:46:53.430 --> 00:46:56.550 Sarah Utley: Well i'm a firm believer that you are what you focus your attention on.

00:46:57.630 --> 00:47:05.160 Sarah Utley: And so, if you want more positivity in your life by focusing on that you will be able to have more positivity.

00:47:05.580 --> 00:47:18.510 Sarah Utley: And it relates back to something called your particular activating system, the rouse as a bundle of nerves at our brain stem that filter out unnecessary information, so the important data gets through.

00:47:19.590 --> 00:47:24.360 Sarah Utley: And it it basically takes what you focus on and then creates a filter for it.

00:47:25.530 --> 00:47:36.990 Sarah Utley: So if you learn a new word it's amazing how many times, she then hear that word or if you notice a new car and then you, you see them everywhere.

00:47:37.530 --> 00:47:50.670 Sarah Utley: Ross works in the same way you're very unconscious that it's happening, but it seeks information to validate your belief, so if you tell yourself you're not confident and giving presentations you won't be confident and giving presentations.

00:47:51.870 --> 00:48:12.540 Sarah Utley: But if you believe that you are then the Ras will find information in your life to confirm that you are positive, you are good at giving a presentation and so you know that influences your actions so it's a tool and a tip is.

00:48:14.130 --> 00:48:31.260 Sarah Utley: Think of a goal or a situation that you want to influence so, for example, i'd like to be more confident talking in front of 500 people and think about them an experience or or results that you want to reach in regards to that goal, and then create a mental movie.

00:48:32.520 --> 00:48:34.410 Sarah Utley: Of now you picture that goal.

00:48:35.640 --> 00:48:45.180 Sarah Utley: Ideally, turning out and then really embellish that movie notice the sounds notice what conversations are going on.

00:48:46.290 --> 00:48:58.830 Sarah Utley: visualize in minute detail you stood there in front of an audience of 500 people and then replay it often in your head, it takes time.

00:49:00.330 --> 00:49:02.070 Sarah Utley: to embed that.

00:49:03.210 --> 00:49:11.010 Sarah Utley: But it's really quite powerful if you create a mental movie have you been successful at doing something that you're really passionate about.

00:49:11.940 --> 00:49:23.400 Pat Duckworth: yeah you know sports people use that a lot when they're learning to do something new, as a golfer and you swing as a tennis player and you serve or return.

00:49:23.790 --> 00:49:39.090 Pat Duckworth: They picture themselves doing it brilliantly, a lot of times before they get out on Court to do it, because when you picture in your head, you can be 100% successful if you get out and do it, you might not always be successful and you might take bad.

00:49:40.500 --> 00:49:52.410 Pat Duckworth: conclusions from what you've done so yeah this is so important visualize things going really well in the crowd cheering and it will it will help that to actually happen, what else can I do.

00:49:53.220 --> 00:50:02.130 Sarah Utley: Well, something that I found really useful is amy cuddy's power pose So I say to myself what would superwoman do.

00:50:03.120 --> 00:50:09.510 Sarah Utley: And I actually stand like usain bolt's so I have a combination of amy Cuddy.

00:50:10.140 --> 00:50:18.900 Sarah Utley: superwoman and usain bolt but there's something really empower that standing there with your arms up as if you're crossing that victory line.

00:50:19.710 --> 00:50:28.890 Sarah Utley: A stand there for two minutes and I do this when i'm at work if I go into an office and my client office and i'm feeling a bit nervous, I will go to the toilet.

00:50:29.460 --> 00:50:43.260 Sarah Utley: And I will set my timer and I will do that in the toilet for two minutes, nobody can see me, but the endorphins that it releases the energy and the passion and power that you get really worth trying and repeating that again.

00:50:44.280 --> 00:50:44.430 Sarah Utley: and

00:50:44.940 --> 00:50:46.890 Pat Duckworth: I mean if anybody watches.

00:50:46.920 --> 00:50:50.730 Pat Duckworth: You know if the people are watching it on Facebook always see me don't see.

00:50:51.360 --> 00:51:05.340 Pat Duckworth: i'm releasing lots of good hormones into my sister i'm getting it all going because you know, have a little dance get your body moving and change your mood change your body, change your mood right what else What else can we bring out of you.

00:51:07.260 --> 00:51:17.490 Sarah Utley: Well, something in positive psychology that I use a lot is building on your strengths so much easier to develop to develop a strength than it is to try and develop something you're not good at.

00:51:18.300 --> 00:51:24.090 Sarah Utley: Really amplify your strengths, so I work with clients on looking at building a confidence will.

00:51:25.710 --> 00:51:36.840 Sarah Utley: What are your values, so we want to ground your confidence in your value so that you're being really authentic and you can gain purpose and meaning to what you do.

00:51:37.200 --> 00:51:45.780 Sarah Utley: And then build the confidence well what have you what your achievements, what are your attributes, what do you hear people say about you what feedback, have you got.

00:51:46.380 --> 00:51:52.470 Sarah Utley: What you really good at, and you can build that map and actually have it on your wall So if you have a wobble.

00:51:53.460 --> 00:52:09.870 Sarah Utley: You know, look at that before a meeting and say yeah Do you know what i'm really brilliant look at all the things i've done in my life that got me to this point and others perceptions or reality and, therefore, if other people perceive you to be confident and in control, you are yeah.

00:52:10.050 --> 00:52:14.190 Pat Duckworth: Absolutely so important, if you got another one for us.

00:52:15.810 --> 00:52:21.240 Sarah Utley: And I would say breath work is really important, as well, learning to breathe.

00:52:22.830 --> 00:52:32.010 Sarah Utley: We are the biggest group of mouth breathers I loved your your piece earlier about snoring society, our society that makes congested people.

00:52:33.030 --> 00:52:40.080 Sarah Utley: In this day and age than we've ever been we do not read very well and just breathing constantly through your nose.

00:52:40.710 --> 00:52:57.060 Sarah Utley: can be so powerful and beneficial and slowing your breathing down breathing into your diaphragm and just slowing the heart rate down can be really, really cathartic in the moment and help you prepare for a big event in advance as well.

00:52:57.510 --> 00:53:09.060 Pat Duckworth: So when you talk about women having more self compassion, is it doing this kind of thing is that what you mean but we're like spending some time to use these kinds of tools.

00:53:10.530 --> 00:53:14.610 Sarah Utley: Think self compassion is is about dropping the judgment, more than anything.

00:53:15.690 --> 00:53:27.120 Sarah Utley: And being kind to yourself, and because you live of women live very busy lives there's lots of demands there's lots of pressures you're going through this huge internal hormonal change.

00:53:27.690 --> 00:53:46.200 Sarah Utley: And we're the worst critics of ourselves and being kind to yourself, giving yourself space to think and time to indulge and to be kind to yourself and not drop the judgment is really what I try to empower people I work with.

00:53:47.100 --> 00:54:05.580 Pat Duckworth: yeah I think that's really important we talk about self care and even that can be misinterpreted like Oh, I need to go and go to a spa or something if you can, if you like, but self care is also about eating properly exercising.

00:54:06.600 --> 00:54:08.400 Pat Duckworth: taking time to breathe.

00:54:09.510 --> 00:54:17.310 Pat Duckworth: seeing a friend, you know all the things that help with our mental wellness because mental wellness is where we want to be.

00:54:17.820 --> 00:54:29.460 Pat Duckworth: And the self compassion side of it is really so important, not looking in the mirror and telling yourself, you feel your lines it's like yeah you're still here i've got another day.

00:54:31.140 --> 00:54:31.530 Pat Duckworth: I think.

00:54:31.650 --> 00:54:33.780 Sarah Utley: you're like the lines on your face.

00:54:33.870 --> 00:54:39.150 Sarah Utley: shows your history and shows the life that the rich fruitful life that you've led.

00:54:39.510 --> 00:54:41.700 Sarah Utley: yeah so I like aligned face.

00:54:41.760 --> 00:54:43.740 Sarah Utley: it's far got far more personality.

00:54:44.370 --> 00:54:49.950 Pat Duckworth: Sarah, thank you for everything you've shared with us, if people want to find out more about you where did they go.

00:54:51.060 --> 00:54:55.800 Sarah Utley: They can go to my website www dot momentum people.com.

00:54:56.850 --> 00:55:01.170 Sarah Utley: I am offering a 30 minute discovery call with myself for free.

00:55:02.190 --> 00:55:07.410 Sarah Utley: yeah reach out happy to have a conversation with anybody about coaching or medicals.

00:55:08.100 --> 00:55:17.370 Pat Duckworth: Well we've had so many tips from you, thank you, so if you've been listening go back listen again because there's a lot of richness in this conversation.

00:55:17.640 --> 00:55:29.550 Pat Duckworth: Just about why you might feel anxious and then how to support your mental health because mental wellness is a thing that can suffer at menopause it's not your fault there's no judgment.

00:55:29.880 --> 00:55:34.290 Pat Duckworth: is just about how the chemicals in your body are working, and the fact that.

00:55:34.800 --> 00:55:46.770 Pat Duckworth: Levels of estrogen affect brain function and they affect how we experience emotions so it's a thing okay don't let anybody tell you, you should feel ashamed about it now.

00:55:47.250 --> 00:55:54.630 Pat Duckworth: we're taking we're empowering ourselves inside will look after ourselves, thank you very much, so thank you for all of that Sarah.

00:55:54.900 --> 00:56:10.170 Pat Duckworth: Stay tuned to talk radio dot nyc where our next program is dismantle racism, with the fabulous Reverend Dr tlc today she's talking about manifest destiny of racism, with her guests Charles l Robinson.

00:56:10.800 --> 00:56:23.790 Pat Duckworth: they're going to discuss the origins of racism, and I think, with everything that went on in America in buffalo weekend that's a really important conversation if you've missed any of the conversations here on.

00:56:24.450 --> 00:56:36.390 Pat Duckworth: Hot women rock you can always go to talk radio dot nyc forward slash hot women rock my guest next week is Rachel Lancaster we're going to have a great conversation I know it's going to be fun.

00:56:36.690 --> 00:56:47.520 Pat Duckworth: So do join us for that, and if you need any help with your mentor paul's packed up with.com you can find out how to contact me and I will be very happy to talk to you.

00:56:47.820 --> 00:56:58.020 Pat Duckworth: Have a brilliant week i'll still be in the UK again next week, I will see you here, but otherwise look after your mental health be compassionate see you next week.