Steve Marchetti is currently a teacher and acts as a a Standardized Patient At Rutgers and Seton Hall Universities.
He has three children and three granddaughters, and has struggled and overcome a number of mental and physical health challenges throughout his 76 years of life. Even so, he "remains grateful despite a shrinking universe."
Tune in for this important conversation at TalkRadio.nyc or watch the Facebook Livestream by clicking here.
The show begins by Albert introducing the special guest named Steve Macrchetti who is a teacher. The two met through a mutual friend. Steve has been through multiple waves of life. He was born in The Bronx, NY. When he turned five he moved to Hudson. Later, he began working with his father. He ended up marrying his high school girlfriend and they spent some time living outside of the state. He says that he has spent most of his life in New Jersey. In addition, Steve leads critical thinking groups. He was inspired by The Socrates Cafe. They would host similar meetings that would help others. The practices of the groups were similar to those of the great philosopher Socrates. Steve explains that the groups stress the ability to listen and ask a question. When there is a group of fifteen people in a room, it is important for each individual to be heard and understood. Also, Steve mentions the importance of challenging with respect.
To begin this segment Steve mentions how a person’s credentials are not always valid when discussing certain philosophies. He explains how one’s personal experiences are what makes up a large portion of their thought. He has also led these groups in prisons. The prisoners really enjoyed it and are pushing for it to become a regular occasion. Steve says the quality of conversation was outstanding. There was a discussion being led based on the question “what distinguishes justice from revenge?” Inside a state penitentiary, there are going to be a multitude of different answers to that question. Everyone had a different reason for being there. Steve also explained that not everyone in there was truly trying to better themselves. Some were there because they were just looking to shorten their sentences. Others were ordinary people who just made mistakes.
Next, Steve opens up about his past troubles abusing alcohol. Alert has many friends who have overcome their problems with drugs and alcohol. Steve mentions that he did not even know he had a problem until it got serious. Eventually, he had to set small goals for himself like not drinking at certain times of the day. In 1988 he began his quitting process. He accepted that he had a problem. He said that people are hurting themselves when they do not accept their problem. After he accepted it, he was able to pick up the phone and get help. Before then, he did not want to reach out to others. The recovery process for him was great. He said he found a certain spirituality that was not religious. The process made him more comfortable praying. He was encouraged to pray by others. He would simply ask in his mind for the pain, fear and uncertainty to go away but it was not directed towards anyone like he is making a wish.
The spirituality discussion continues in this segment. Steve talks about when we are asking for too much. When he was praying, he was asking for total relief when that might not have been what he needed. He just really needed some of it. His work at Seton Hall and Rutgers incorporates role play. At times, he will give symptoms to students and role play being the patient while they act as the specialist. There has been great feedback coming from the students and faculty of the universities. In July there will be a new wave of standardized patients who will be trained and ready to go. Lastly, the two discuss that there are some things that cannot be controlled but it is more important to take care of the aspects that can be controlled. Also, it is important to remember that there is hope when facing a challenging circumstance.
00:00:39.780 --> 00:00:59.190 Albert Dabah: hi there, my name is Albert dabba and I am the host of extra innings covering all the bases extra innings is a program I started months ago and we talk about the challenges of life, many different kinds of challenges the ups and downs.
00:01:00.300 --> 00:01:06.510 Albert Dabah: People going through mental wellness mental illness depression, anxiety.
00:01:08.070 --> 00:01:19.530 Albert Dabah: All kinds of challenges that each one of us face at one time or another, at times, things get so bad sometimes people look at suicide as a way out.
00:01:20.340 --> 00:01:31.920 Albert Dabah: On our shows we've had on many different kinds of people from different spheres of life we've had on therapists policeman artists musicians writers people in sports.
00:01:33.630 --> 00:01:39.660 Albert Dabah: All talking about different parts of their lives of where they came from and where they are now.
00:01:41.010 --> 00:01:52.620 Albert Dabah: Tonight I would like to introduce Steve machete who has gone through many different phases of his life, and we will talk about where he's come from and where he is now.
00:01:53.850 --> 00:02:05.040 Albert Dabah: Before that, I would just like to say that extra innings comes from a movie that I made, I wrote it directed it produced it and acted in it and is now on Amazon prime.
00:02:05.490 --> 00:02:16.590 Albert Dabah: So when you have a chance to check it out extra innings on Amazon prime so i'd like to introduce Steve machete who lives in montclair New Jersey Steve how are you tonight.
00:02:17.520 --> 00:02:19.650 Steve Marchetti: i'm very well, thank you very much.
00:02:20.670 --> 00:02:35.340 Albert Dabah: Good good good to see you Dave we've spoken a few times I got to know you through a friend of mine that I played baseball with and i'd like to begin by asking you some questions about.
00:02:37.140 --> 00:02:52.470 Albert Dabah: I know you live in montclair New Jersey and you've done so many different things in your life, and if you can maybe go back a little bit in time and tell us where you were at a certain time where you are now.
00:02:53.880 --> 00:03:09.240 Albert Dabah: One of the things that really gravitated me towards you was the groups that you lead in different places, and I know we'll get to that so start off Stephen let's hear a little bit about yourself.
00:03:09.870 --> 00:03:16.020 Steve Marchetti: All right, well let's see I was born in the bronx on 76 years ago.
00:03:19.980 --> 00:03:20.520 Steve Marchetti: let's see, I have.
00:03:21.720 --> 00:03:23.730 Steve Marchetti: A brother and a sister i'm the oldest.
00:03:25.500 --> 00:03:28.350 Steve Marchetti: We move from the bronx when.
00:03:29.400 --> 00:03:49.020 Steve Marchetti: The family moved from the bronx when I was about five we move to Hastings on Hudson New York to up the River always and my father committed to this city and I followed the the pattern of young people of the time you you grew up in the suburbs and.
00:03:50.100 --> 00:03:55.860 Steve Marchetti: You graduate from high school, maybe absent college and then you get yourself a job in the city.
00:03:57.060 --> 00:04:06.750 Steve Marchetti: And I commuted with my father and my first job was with a public television station early days of public television.
00:04:07.950 --> 00:04:27.090 Steve Marchetti: And then you know you you hope, for we do well and save a little money and then you get your own apartment and the cycle would repeat itself so that I get my apartment I would find someone in get married and then we would move to the suburbs in our kids were then move to.
00:04:28.710 --> 00:04:31.170 Steve Marchetti: move to the city after they found a job.
00:04:32.250 --> 00:04:35.220 Steve Marchetti: And that was pretty much the pattern I married.
00:04:36.690 --> 00:04:38.460 Steve Marchetti: married a woman on the guy school with.
00:04:40.380 --> 00:04:41.490 Steve Marchetti: We had three children.
00:04:43.680 --> 00:04:45.810 Steve Marchetti: We moved we spent a brief.
00:04:47.130 --> 00:04:55.530 Steve Marchetti: brief part of our time together in near Boston where we had our first child and.
00:04:56.970 --> 00:05:02.220 Steve Marchetti: Tonight we made the decision to move back to the New York area.
00:05:03.990 --> 00:05:18.930 Steve Marchetti: I took a job in a family business to to show to help help the family out really is how I see it, so we move back here and we had a child and it's not I would rather send my children to.
00:05:20.250 --> 00:05:22.950 Steve Marchetti: School in New Jersey manga school in.
00:05:24.030 --> 00:05:31.290 Steve Marchetti: Either New York City or Queens or wherever I might be able to afford to live, so when we came back here we.
00:05:32.940 --> 00:05:36.780 Steve Marchetti: lived in New Jersey and that was in 19.
00:05:39.000 --> 00:05:39.480 Steve Marchetti: gosh.
00:05:40.530 --> 00:05:50.070 Steve Marchetti: That was in 1976 when we move back here and i've been in this part of New Jersey now northern New Jersey Essex County.
00:05:52.590 --> 00:05:56.190 Steve Marchetti: Ever since 1979 yeah 1976.
00:05:57.120 --> 00:06:00.090 Steve Marchetti: The most of my life now i've spent in New Jersey.
00:06:01.470 --> 00:06:20.820 Albert Dabah: Now, one of the things we talked about was um these groups that you've led and i'm not sure when you started to lead the groups but i'd be interested to hear more about the groups that you lead, because I think they were critical thinking groups, you call them.
00:06:21.000 --> 00:06:23.730 Albert Dabah: Yes, and tell me how you got into that.
00:06:24.840 --> 00:06:25.320 Steve Marchetti: sure.
00:06:27.450 --> 00:06:37.440 Steve Marchetti: There is a coffeehouse on bloomfield avenue here in montclair it's not there anymore, it was called kulash to.
00:06:38.580 --> 00:06:41.400 Steve Marchetti: and on Tuesday nights.
00:06:43.620 --> 00:06:53.010 Steve Marchetti: A guy a graduate student or graduate philosophy student from montclair state began having conversations in the coffee house.
00:06:54.150 --> 00:06:59.940 Steve Marchetti: Philosophical conversations and he called he called the evening Socrates CAFE.
00:07:01.110 --> 00:07:18.750 Steve Marchetti: And he would take suggestions from the you know, those of us gathered in the coffee House as to what we might want to talk about and it could be any one of the classical Platonic Socratic topics and.
00:07:20.280 --> 00:07:24.450 Steve Marchetti: You know, love justice truth beauty.
00:07:26.250 --> 00:07:30.150 Steve Marchetti: what's the difference between work and play and you might think that.
00:07:31.620 --> 00:07:34.290 Steve Marchetti: You know that really doesn't leave much.
00:07:35.700 --> 00:07:37.440 Steve Marchetti: It doesn't sound like much of a.
00:07:38.610 --> 00:07:39.180 Steve Marchetti: Of a.
00:07:41.220 --> 00:07:45.780 Steve Marchetti: fun kind of a thing to do, but you'd be amazed and so.
00:07:47.160 --> 00:07:55.320 Steve Marchetti: I began to attend those Tuesday night gatherings philosophical discussions Socrates CAFE and.
00:07:56.460 --> 00:08:08.370 Steve Marchetti: The leader at the time, his life took him to the west coast and he left Socrates CAFE to the five of us and we shared facilitating.
00:08:10.080 --> 00:08:16.050 Steve Marchetti: And then, one by one, the other four went on to do other things in their lives and.
00:08:17.490 --> 00:08:24.540 Steve Marchetti: I was the only one left, and so I continue doing that was missing 1997 minutes, and it was.
00:08:24.960 --> 00:08:32.430 Albert Dabah: So there's a pretty soon me the Scottish Socrates CAFE is that does that come from something that goes way back, is it is it.
00:08:33.690 --> 00:08:51.300 Albert Dabah: A method of people getting around talking like a coffee house that goes back to I mean obviously Socrates is a great philosopher and Greek time so it's like is that something that has the history of people doing these kinds of meetings, I would say.
00:08:51.660 --> 00:08:53.970 Steve Marchetti: Yes, for sure, as a matter of fact.
00:08:55.500 --> 00:08:57.060 Steve Marchetti: Socrates was.
00:08:58.080 --> 00:09:06.900 Steve Marchetti: was a man who used to gather in the gora the town square as they called it and and would have.
00:09:08.100 --> 00:09:14.730 Steve Marchetti: Hold conversations with anyone who wanted to sort of gather around and listen.
00:09:16.770 --> 00:09:17.220 Steve Marchetti: and
00:09:18.930 --> 00:09:19.380 Steve Marchetti: The.
00:09:22.500 --> 00:09:26.100 Steve Marchetti: The tradition of how to ask the question and.
00:09:27.450 --> 00:09:28.920 Steve Marchetti: And, and how to.
00:09:30.570 --> 00:09:31.920 Steve Marchetti: How to explore.
00:09:32.970 --> 00:09:37.620 Steve Marchetti: The subject deeply is rooted in in Ancient Greece.
00:09:39.060 --> 00:09:41.910 Steve Marchetti: And, and even even even more recently.
00:09:43.110 --> 00:09:50.250 Steve Marchetti: It became I understand I never lived there, so I can tell you from my own experience, but the way I understand it.
00:09:51.390 --> 00:10:00.450 Steve Marchetti: In in Paris, for example on Sundays mom would take the kitchen go to church and dad would go to the local.
00:10:02.490 --> 00:10:11.280 Steve Marchetti: outdoor CAFE gather with his friends drink Espresso and smoke goals and discuss the topics of the day.
00:10:13.020 --> 00:10:30.900 Steve Marchetti: And this way of combining this Socrates CAFE activity that this fellow started his name was Chris Phillips borrowed from his experience with the study of philosophy and that.
00:10:32.250 --> 00:10:43.050 Steve Marchetti: French cultural practice of mom taking the kids to church and dad hanging out at the CAFE until they were done or talking about the issues of the day, with his friends.
00:10:43.500 --> 00:10:45.060 Albert Dabah: hat, so how did you find.
00:10:46.110 --> 00:10:55.440 Albert Dabah: I imagine, I mean you went to these groups you enjoyed the groups and then you started leading the groups, what How does it benefit you i'm curious about the benefits that you found from.
00:10:55.830 --> 00:10:57.210 Steve Marchetti: The school more.
00:10:58.680 --> 00:11:02.010 Steve Marchetti: First of all, it teaches you how to listen.
00:11:03.090 --> 00:11:18.390 Steve Marchetti: And how whenever you have a group of people together having a conversation like that, and we might be, you know 15 or 20 people in there, at a time, and you need to make sure everybody who wants to is heard.
00:11:20.220 --> 00:11:37.170 Steve Marchetti: And it requires an understanding of the fact that the important, the most important thing happening in the world is the listening, that the talking, because in a group of 15 people 14 are listening one is talking.
00:11:38.520 --> 00:11:41.880 Steve Marchetti: So the ability to listen and.
00:11:43.800 --> 00:11:44.880 Steve Marchetti: is risky.
00:11:46.440 --> 00:11:49.230 Steve Marchetti: And how to how to ask a question.
00:11:50.850 --> 00:12:02.370 Steve Marchetti: I hear now i've gone and said that and I don't know if I can I don't know if I can make make that statement better understood, but with an example, but.
00:12:05.820 --> 00:12:09.810 Steve Marchetti: it's it's necessary to be able to challenge.
00:12:11.730 --> 00:12:12.870 Steve Marchetti: With respect.
00:12:14.520 --> 00:12:20.520 Steve Marchetti: To be able to reflect back what you thought you heard from someone who made a statement.
00:12:23.400 --> 00:12:24.390 Steve Marchetti: Mostly.
00:12:26.010 --> 00:12:38.790 Steve Marchetti: The reader of a group, like that it's not a forum for him it's a responsibility to make sure that the light is shining to all the dark corners.
00:12:39.450 --> 00:12:57.720 Steve Marchetti: And that you know, like like eating crabs I don't know if anybody has ever eaten crabs and in Maryland they dumped them out on newspaper on a picnic table and you need to be able to get all the goodies out of that crab.
00:12:59.040 --> 00:13:07.560 Steve Marchetti: don't stop till you them, and when you when you're done you're left with what looks like a pirate fingernail means you did a good job.
00:13:09.930 --> 00:13:29.010 Steve Marchetti: But yeah listening learning how to frame a question and how to shine a light in the dark corners and challenging with respect, there needs to be some challenge but it's got to be respectful otherwise people won't come back people don't want to come to an activity where they are embarrassed.
00:13:29.610 --> 00:13:44.010 Albert Dabah: Right um we're going to take a break in a minute or so, but i'd like to what what it brings up to mine is kind of a sort of a therapy group of some kind, but not really a therapy group but.
00:13:45.330 --> 00:13:54.060 Albert Dabah: I would imagine at times there were challenges that came up that as a leader you wherever was leading the Group would have to kind of.
00:13:54.900 --> 00:14:04.710 Albert Dabah: You know, really monitor that like like so it doesn't get too challenging for somebody because obviously listening, is a very.
00:14:05.160 --> 00:14:19.710 Albert Dabah: difficult thing to do, at times, especially with a lot of people involved group for someone to listen to someone else and to really listen, because sometimes we're we want to think we were ready to ask our questions are ready to say what we want to say.
00:14:20.040 --> 00:14:34.680 Albert Dabah: While someone's already talking so we'll get back in a minute after a series of commercials and Steve speak more with Steve about the Socrates CAFE.
00:14:36.810 --> 00:14:42.690 Albert Dabah: meetings that he used to run and and find out more about Steve thanks Steve we'll be right back.
00:17:39.300 --> 00:17:52.650 Albert Dabah: hi we're back with Steve machete and we've been talking about these groups that he has led based on Socrates CAFE, which is a groups of people getting together and talking about different.
00:17:53.130 --> 00:18:08.430 Albert Dabah: Parts of life different philosophies and learning how to really listen up i'm curious Steve was there, something that led you to these groups for their challenges in your life that you were dealing with at that time, or that.
00:18:09.960 --> 00:18:16.620 Albert Dabah: That you felt like you felt this need to join these groups i'm curious about that because normally when someone decides to do something.
00:18:18.090 --> 00:18:26.100 Albert Dabah: There you know we all sometimes want to try something new try something different, and usually there's a reason why i'm curious about that.
00:18:27.270 --> 00:18:36.000 Steve Marchetti: Well, in the beginning it was it was curiosity what brought me in the door, the first time was just curiosity.
00:18:37.020 --> 00:18:45.270 Steve Marchetti: It first I sort of wondered what made someone think that he could lead a philosophical discussion and.
00:18:46.680 --> 00:18:52.680 Steve Marchetti: What I learned was that he was not contributing anything he was.
00:18:53.850 --> 00:18:56.880 Steve Marchetti: He was pulling it out of us and.
00:18:57.990 --> 00:19:00.180 Steve Marchetti: One of the one of the things that.
00:19:01.440 --> 00:19:15.900 Steve Marchetti: That was part of those those early groups and the ones that I that I mean today are that people are encouraged to speak from their personal experience, so what books you've read what philosophers you studied how many degrees, you have.
00:19:17.190 --> 00:19:35.010 Steve Marchetti: has no value really not in the room in in the form that we create one of the most interesting and enjoyable conversations I had was among senior citizens and eighth graders.
00:19:36.060 --> 00:19:48.960 Steve Marchetti: And the topic that arose out of the beginning, you know get to know you phase was what is what is it mean to be old what is old and to hear.
00:19:49.620 --> 00:20:08.970 Steve Marchetti: 90 year old great grandmother discuss this with an eight year old, who is not their grandchild or Great grandchild just strangers was amazing, and so it is a place to bring your personal experiences.
00:20:10.140 --> 00:20:11.820 Steve Marchetti: It isn't therapy so.
00:20:13.620 --> 00:20:17.760 Steve Marchetti: You know, there is a limit our personal we want things to get.
00:20:19.050 --> 00:20:25.950 Steve Marchetti: But everything that happens is inspired by one's personal experience right.
00:20:25.980 --> 00:20:33.090 Albert Dabah: Right, I mean so many of us go through some you know different ups and downs in life that bring us to a point where.
00:20:34.230 --> 00:20:46.800 Albert Dabah: we're looking for something and sometimes I know, one of the things that you talk to me about was how you've gone into prisons and have lead groups there can you talk a little bit about that.
00:20:47.070 --> 00:21:10.740 Steve Marchetti: Sure, one of the regulars on those Tuesday nights in that CAFE worked at East Jersey state prison in rahway New Jersey and she thought that this activity would be helpful to an enjoyable for the prison inmates in his church and state prison so she brought a couple of us.
00:21:11.910 --> 00:21:18.540 Steve Marchetti: Down there as guests, and we had a sort of a trial run and they seem to enjoy it.
00:21:20.550 --> 00:21:35.310 Steve Marchetti: seemed to I mean I I can observe people, as well as anybody else and they they really enjoyed, to the point where they wanted it back and this this woman who worked there.
00:21:36.720 --> 00:21:43.710 Steve Marchetti: made the arrangements with the prison for it to be a continuing thing, and I was willing to go down there and do it.
00:21:45.750 --> 00:21:58.380 Steve Marchetti: What she did, though, was to in her proposal to the administration of the prison she called the activity critical thinking so it became a course in critical thinking.
00:21:59.310 --> 00:22:13.560 Steve Marchetti: So we took exactly what we did in Socrates CAFE called it critical thinking and just continued with the conversation stations in the in the same way, using the same guidelines.
00:22:14.100 --> 00:22:31.890 Steve Marchetti: And it became a very, very popular activity at the prison and there there's no any group of people i've done it in in churches and i've done it in high schools and i've done it in senior citizen residences.
00:22:32.970 --> 00:22:35.400 Steve Marchetti: As well as coffee houses and.
00:22:36.600 --> 00:22:50.910 Steve Marchetti: it's very much the same wherever you go, but a little different, and I have to say, the the quality of the conversation in the prison was different from any any other place.
00:22:52.980 --> 00:22:54.360 Albert Dabah: Why was that i'm curious what.
00:22:54.390 --> 00:23:16.140 Steve Marchetti: Why well there was one conversation we had the topic was what distinguishes revenge from just imagine having that conversation with a bunch of people who have who are doing long stretches in prison East Jersey state prison is not where you go.
00:23:17.220 --> 00:23:18.120 Steve Marchetti: For.
00:23:19.140 --> 00:23:31.380 Steve Marchetti: misdemeanors and it's a it's a State penitentiary for people who've done some pretty serious things and they're going to be there for a long time, and you may have heard it said that.
00:23:33.900 --> 00:23:42.780 Steve Marchetti: Everybody in prison is innocent just ask them well, I found that not everybody in prison, was in this and they didn't believe that we're in is.
00:23:43.530 --> 00:23:57.120 Steve Marchetti: What i've been venture to say that there are very few people in prison who have not been treated unjustly and that that conversation about justice and revenge, was a very interesting fruitful conversation.
00:23:59.400 --> 00:24:01.380 Albert Dabah: Did you find there.
00:24:03.510 --> 00:24:08.310 Albert Dabah: decisions to be in the group with with a well for the people that came to the group.
00:24:09.150 --> 00:24:11.190 Steve Marchetti: Well let's see um.
00:24:12.390 --> 00:24:31.920 Steve Marchetti: I guess you could say that the nature of the people in the group sort of followed the idea of the bell curve right, so there were people there who were China up to do anything, just to be out of the routine of the person right then.
00:24:33.510 --> 00:24:34.140 Steve Marchetti: There were.
00:24:35.670 --> 00:24:38.940 Steve Marchetti: People on the, on the other end who were.
00:24:40.530 --> 00:24:45.120 Steve Marchetti: very committed to it, there were educated people in there.
00:24:46.740 --> 00:24:49.320 Steve Marchetti: And they may be mirrored.
00:24:50.370 --> 00:24:57.510 Steve Marchetti: What I encountered in in the coffee, but then that great middle of the bell curve was just.
00:24:58.710 --> 00:25:01.260 Steve Marchetti: Just a guy who made a mistake.
00:25:03.240 --> 00:25:07.410 Steve Marchetti: And between those those those middle.
00:25:08.430 --> 00:25:17.700 Steve Marchetti: middle of the bell curve people and the ones who are who had some education and had some experience we had to really find discussions and.
00:25:19.230 --> 00:25:28.290 Steve Marchetti: The people who napped or who were just there to get away from whatever else there no from prison life.
00:25:30.390 --> 00:25:31.800 Steve Marchetti: They just sort of sat in the back.
00:25:32.610 --> 00:25:40.980 Albert Dabah: Did you have people in there, who would had some psychological problems, some or some serious psychological problems.
00:25:42.510 --> 00:25:48.000 Steve Marchetti: yeah every once in a while and again this is true of any group.
00:25:50.700 --> 00:25:54.360 Steve Marchetti: There was a young man had to be in his 30s.
00:25:56.010 --> 00:26:09.390 Steve Marchetti: And he he did, let it be known that he'd been incarcerated since he was 17 and it was strange you could you could look at him and see a 35 year old guy.
00:26:10.560 --> 00:26:14.610 Steve Marchetti: But the way he carried himself and the way he wore his hair.
00:26:16.230 --> 00:26:18.870 Steve Marchetti: And the way he spoke all.
00:26:20.010 --> 00:26:28.590 Steve Marchetti: folk have a 17 year old and he was extremely well prepared wherever we.
00:26:29.580 --> 00:26:38.850 Steve Marchetti: decided we were going to talk about he was very well prepared and he always had something to say he was he was somebody who every once in a while you'd have to say.
00:26:39.570 --> 00:26:48.090 Steve Marchetti: No hang on, we need to hear from some other people, which is necessary, sometimes and I learned what what it happened to him.
00:26:50.010 --> 00:26:55.050 Steve Marchetti: whenever he did, and I never learned exactly what it was, but he was.
00:26:56.100 --> 00:26:57.090 Steve Marchetti: convicted in.
00:26:59.490 --> 00:27:12.360 Steve Marchetti: By an all white jury in a courtroom with a gallery of nothing but white people the judge was white, and this was a young black man or a 35 year old black man there.
00:27:13.290 --> 00:27:26.100 Steve Marchetti: And when the judge asked him if he had anything to say before he was sentence, he said yes, and he made a statement and the courtroom erupted into Laughter
00:27:27.420 --> 00:27:37.440 Steve Marchetti: At what he said and how he said, and he vowed he would never ever let anything like that happened to him again so.
00:27:38.220 --> 00:27:44.310 Steve Marchetti: He read everything you'd be get his hands on in prison and came to every group he could.
00:27:44.790 --> 00:27:55.530 Steve Marchetti: Join whatever it was whether it was critical thinking, whether they were religious, it was a religious group, which would come into the prison now and then there were.
00:27:56.010 --> 00:28:08.100 Steve Marchetti: educational opportunities, not many, but there were ged possibilities and certain colleges and universities will offer classes, he took everything he could take and.
00:28:09.420 --> 00:28:10.290 Steve Marchetti: And that was.
00:28:11.310 --> 00:28:14.640 Steve Marchetti: It made how he how he.
00:28:16.470 --> 00:28:20.790 Steve Marchetti: met the critical thinking class fell right into place.
00:28:22.380 --> 00:28:24.030 Steve Marchetti: And he did have.
00:28:26.160 --> 00:28:37.230 Steve Marchetti: Some psychological problems when he was he was managing them in the best way that he knew he wasn't you they had a SEC department there but it wasn't.
00:28:37.890 --> 00:28:50.790 Steve Marchetti: It wasn't there to give people therapy, it was there to maintain order so he was doing his best not to let a horrible experience that you know happened to happen again.
00:28:52.050 --> 00:28:54.240 Albert Dabah: mm hmm well, it sounds like.
00:28:55.380 --> 00:29:02.520 Albert Dabah: These groups could have a multitude of different kinds of people there with all kinds of issues and challenges that they're there for.
00:29:02.820 --> 00:29:03.240 Steve Marchetti: Oh yeah.
00:29:03.690 --> 00:29:23.370 Albert Dabah: Well we'll be back Steve after this commercial and continue on this conversation with these critical thinking groups and because I find them they seem very, very useful, especially today all right we'll be right back with Steve machete right after these words, thank you.
00:29:30.030 --> 00:29:31.200 Educating and.
00:32:11.160 --> 00:32:19.980 Albert Dabah: we're back with Steve machete and we've been talking about these groups that he has led in prisons i'm Steve in their bio you wrote that you're.
00:32:21.210 --> 00:32:23.130 Albert Dabah: At one point in your life, you were.
00:32:24.150 --> 00:32:31.650 Albert Dabah: had some problems with alcohol, can you tell us about that, and how did you recover from that because I know many people.
00:32:32.400 --> 00:32:44.130 Albert Dabah: Not just people on the show, but people that I know who have had drug and alcohol problems, who have been able to get through that and and really lead successful lives.
00:32:45.030 --> 00:32:52.200 Albert Dabah: And maybe at some point, they were successful, during that time and not are ups and downs, but tell us a little bit about that.
00:32:53.340 --> 00:32:54.660 Steve Marchetti: Oh sure um.
00:32:56.370 --> 00:32:57.360 Steve Marchetti: I guess.
00:32:58.470 --> 00:33:01.800 Steve Marchetti: I can't speak for anyone else the way.
00:33:03.180 --> 00:33:06.450 Steve Marchetti: The way alcohol sort of got Ahold of me was.
00:33:08.010 --> 00:33:14.730 Steve Marchetti: The way a boa constrictor swallow somebody I mean very, very slowly and.
00:33:15.930 --> 00:33:24.000 Steve Marchetti: You don't know that you've got a problem until it's really, really serious least I didn't and.
00:33:26.130 --> 00:33:32.130 Steve Marchetti: At the time, it was 30 years 1988 when I decided, I had enough.
00:33:33.960 --> 00:33:34.980 Steve Marchetti: That was after.
00:33:37.530 --> 00:33:51.330 Steve Marchetti: I know that 26 years of ever increasing drinking ever increasing quantities and all of the little guidelines that I would set for myself like not drinking in the morning and.
00:33:52.020 --> 00:34:07.980 Steve Marchetti: Not drinking at work and not drinking in front of the children all of those great little benchmarks those little you know lines that I would not cross they all got cross and.
00:34:09.450 --> 00:34:10.350 Steve Marchetti: By the time.
00:34:12.270 --> 00:34:14.130 Steve Marchetti: 1988 rolled around.
00:34:16.500 --> 00:34:18.090 Steve Marchetti: I had had enough.
00:34:20.280 --> 00:34:25.260 Steve Marchetti: But I the idea of admitting that I had a problem to.
00:34:26.700 --> 00:34:38.490 Steve Marchetti: The people very close to me particularly my wife, who, by the way, of course, knew that I have a problem, but the odd thing about someone with a drinking problem.
00:34:39.510 --> 00:34:44.100 Steve Marchetti: If they don't once they if they don't admit it they're just.
00:34:45.210 --> 00:34:45.750 Steve Marchetti: they're just.
00:34:47.040 --> 00:34:48.480 Steve Marchetti: it's I don't know how to put this now.
00:34:50.100 --> 00:35:07.590 Steve Marchetti: they're they're heavy drinker who doesn't have a problem, the minute they admit, they have a problem, then there, there are some kind of a nutcase so it's very hard to from the from the inside, from being an alcohol to.
00:35:08.820 --> 00:35:23.280 Steve Marchetti: want to bring down on yourself the stigma of admitting you have a problem and that kept me out there for quite a while I didn't know how to tell those close to me that I had a problem.
00:35:24.000 --> 00:35:34.650 Steve Marchetti: If it was not difficult to be intoxicated in front of them, but to tell them, I had a problem in this going to get help that was fine.
00:35:36.840 --> 00:35:39.000 Steve Marchetti: It doesn't make sense and so much about.
00:35:40.170 --> 00:35:49.170 Steve Marchetti: addiction, whether it be alcohol or or other drugs and recovery is mysterious it's it defies logic.
00:35:50.610 --> 00:35:53.970 Steve Marchetti: But there was a day when I knew I needed help.
00:35:55.290 --> 00:36:12.090 Steve Marchetti: But I was unwilling to pick up the phone I was only willing to ask for help respond willing to tell those around me that I needed help, and then the next day I could do it and I had no idea what happened in the interval.
00:36:14.190 --> 00:36:26.550 Steve Marchetti: I been in touch with a therapist who told me that when I was reading she could make arrangements for me to get into a detox and and get whatever.
00:36:27.570 --> 00:36:28.830 Steve Marchetti: Whatever care, I might need.
00:36:30.270 --> 00:36:36.810 Steve Marchetti: So one day, I could not pick up that phone and the next day I could pick up the phone I don't know what.
00:36:38.700 --> 00:36:47.130 Steve Marchetti: I tell my parents who are still alive my employer and, of course, my immediate family wife and three children.
00:36:48.630 --> 00:36:49.230 Steve Marchetti: And that was.
00:36:50.370 --> 00:36:52.560 Steve Marchetti: As they say the first day of the rest of my life.
00:36:54.360 --> 00:36:58.530 Steve Marchetti: I wish I could be more explicit and helpful, maybe.
00:36:59.970 --> 00:37:08.580 Steve Marchetti: In in telling you what it was that made it impossible, one day, and absolutely necessary, the next.
00:37:08.640 --> 00:37:11.130 Albert Dabah: Right what was recovery like for you, though.
00:37:12.240 --> 00:37:14.730 Steve Marchetti: Oh it's it's still an adventure.
00:37:16.020 --> 00:37:17.430 Steve Marchetti: In the beginning.
00:37:18.480 --> 00:37:26.490 Steve Marchetti: It was, it was very hard, there were things I was called upon to do that I couldn't imagine doing.
00:37:29.640 --> 00:37:32.640 Steve Marchetti: Recovery requires a certain amount of.
00:37:34.110 --> 00:37:37.980 Steve Marchetti: Finding some spirituality within yourself.
00:37:39.390 --> 00:37:42.270 Steve Marchetti: Not religion and it doesn't even require.
00:37:43.860 --> 00:37:44.340 Steve Marchetti: God.
00:37:48.090 --> 00:37:55.920 Steve Marchetti: But some measure of spirituality is necessary, and that was that was the the big.
00:37:57.360 --> 00:37:58.920 Steve Marchetti: Well, I guess, the most important.
00:38:00.630 --> 00:38:01.800 Steve Marchetti: hurdle that.
00:38:03.300 --> 00:38:21.180 Steve Marchetti: There is no hurdle that sounds like a thing that's there you jump over it now you're, on the other side, it was really a matter of of years of going to meetings and interacting with other people with similar difficulties and hearing Their stories.
00:38:23.460 --> 00:38:33.750 Steve Marchetti: that's one of the most important ways that recovery happens is we listen to each other's stories and identify with what we hear.
00:38:34.410 --> 00:38:40.770 Albert Dabah: It I think you said something that you, you had to do some things that you thought you never could do, did you say something like that.
00:38:40.920 --> 00:38:41.550 Steve Marchetti: Well yeah.
00:38:41.850 --> 00:38:43.590 Albert Dabah: Like, for example, like what like what.
00:38:44.400 --> 00:38:46.020 Steve Marchetti: pray i'm a regular basis.
00:38:46.290 --> 00:38:47.970 Steve Marchetti: Really yeah.
00:38:49.320 --> 00:38:53.820 Steve Marchetti: I, I have a vivid memory of the first time.
00:38:55.260 --> 00:38:57.750 Steve Marchetti: I I pray in a way that.
00:38:59.940 --> 00:39:01.590 Steve Marchetti: The outcome was meaningful to me.
00:39:04.200 --> 00:39:09.240 Steve Marchetti: And by the way, I in Michigan This is all personal to me.
00:39:09.390 --> 00:39:09.840 sure.
00:39:11.550 --> 00:39:27.270 Steve Marchetti: I don't find it necessary to pray to anyone or anything praying is is merely making a wish or giving thanks there there's a very sort of tongue in cheek humorous but very effective.
00:39:30.330 --> 00:39:46.320 Steve Marchetti: way to pray it's it's it's like the primary colors of prayer give me help thanks and wow so there's prayers where we ask for things there's prayers where we give thanks.
00:39:47.430 --> 00:39:50.940 Steve Marchetti: Give me thank help there's prayers for help.
00:39:52.950 --> 00:39:57.750 Steve Marchetti: Give me help thanks, and while and and sometimes you just want to say.
00:39:58.830 --> 00:40:02.460 Steve Marchetti: holy smokes that was incredible and.
00:40:03.930 --> 00:40:09.180 Steve Marchetti: It once I I could approach it with a bigger lightheartedness.
00:40:10.320 --> 00:40:13.650 Steve Marchetti: It became and and we and and we.
00:40:14.850 --> 00:40:16.260 Steve Marchetti: An address see out.
00:40:18.510 --> 00:40:20.310 Steve Marchetti: It made all the difference to me.
00:40:21.990 --> 00:40:22.530 Steve Marchetti: and
00:40:23.700 --> 00:40:36.540 Steve Marchetti: part of my life some years ago took me into hospital for some pretty serious surgery, and when I woke from the anesthetic I was in pain.
00:40:37.560 --> 00:40:42.900 Steve Marchetti: I was in the midst of great uncertainty, this was surgery for cancer and so.
00:40:44.520 --> 00:40:48.510 Steve Marchetti: I was uncertain as to what the outcome was.
00:40:49.680 --> 00:40:55.380 Steve Marchetti: So there is pain, fear and uncertainty and I found them nearly unbearable.
00:40:56.430 --> 00:41:11.790 Steve Marchetti: And so I thought well okay in in recovery, they have encouraged me to pray so now would be a good time, and so I prayed for the pain and the fear and the uncertainty to go away and it didn't.
00:41:13.080 --> 00:41:14.940 Steve Marchetti: And I was.
00:41:16.170 --> 00:41:16.650 Steve Marchetti: kind of.
00:41:18.900 --> 00:41:27.540 Steve Marchetti: You know I had that well, what did I expect you know because I I hadn't been a prayer I hadn't been a religious or spiritual person.
00:41:29.340 --> 00:41:38.430 Steve Marchetti: But I I thought, well, maybe if I just asked for the pain and the fear and the uncertainty to become manageable.
00:41:40.710 --> 00:42:00.000 Steve Marchetti: And so I I restated the prayer, if you will, and this is all in my head i'm not getting on my knees i'm not saying it out loud i'm just asking in my mind, please make the pain and the fear and the uncertainty, make it manageable and it was.
00:42:00.510 --> 00:42:06.000 Albert Dabah: Did you get it sounds to me like you really went through some hard times and.
00:42:07.140 --> 00:42:10.230 Albert Dabah: Possibly with help of others around you.
00:42:10.890 --> 00:42:15.030 Albert Dabah: you're able to put it together because, like even just now when you just said.
00:42:17.010 --> 00:42:22.500 Albert Dabah: You know you didn't go away the pain that fear and uncertainty, but you made it manageable.
00:42:22.800 --> 00:42:24.360 Albert Dabah: And I think that's a very.
00:42:25.410 --> 00:42:42.150 Albert Dabah: wise thing to understand in life is to realize that we have a problem, and we might not be able to you know we might not be able to take care of it completely or no 100% what's going to happen.
00:42:42.720 --> 00:42:54.060 Albert Dabah: But that we know that we're on a path to manage it, that I think that is a really great thing and a lesson for people to hear and to know that, because managing.
00:42:54.360 --> 00:43:08.100 Albert Dabah: Certain ways of being like managing your mind to think a certain way, as opposed to think, well, I have to get rid of this tomorrow, I have to get rid of this soon I need to know.
00:43:09.600 --> 00:43:11.490 Albert Dabah: Life is full of uncertainty.
00:43:11.670 --> 00:43:20.520 Albert Dabah: Oh boy and i'm sure in the groups, and I would bet that this led to the critical thinking groups, am I right.
00:43:21.240 --> 00:43:23.070 Steve Marchetti: I it did and.
00:43:24.270 --> 00:43:24.420 Albert Dabah: What.
00:43:25.620 --> 00:43:33.780 Albert Dabah: we're going to break for a commercial in a minute, but I that he It makes me think that did that come after this or during that same time.
00:43:34.140 --> 00:43:37.230 Steve Marchetti: It followed by about six or seven or eight years.
00:43:37.440 --> 00:43:37.920 Albert Dabah: I see.
00:43:37.980 --> 00:43:39.540 Steve Marchetti: Wait wait, yes, you take.
00:43:39.630 --> 00:43:47.910 Steve Marchetti: Those experiences and you find a way to express them or use them in those conversations.
00:43:48.420 --> 00:43:59.400 Albert Dabah: yeah because I know as working as a therapist and a life coach with people it's so important to learn how to manage and just anyone learns how to manage.
00:44:00.030 --> 00:44:13.830 Albert Dabah: Their day what they're going to do when problems come up and there's always something that's going to come up so anyway we'll be right back with Steve machete on his life experiences and where he is today, thank you.
00:44:20.850 --> 00:44:21.750 Education.
00:46:32.220 --> 00:46:35.370 Albert Dabah: we're back with Steve machete um so Steve.
00:46:37.020 --> 00:46:46.650 Albert Dabah: One of the things also you have written is that you do Is this something you do now or you've done before, working with Seton hall and rutgers university.
00:46:46.950 --> 00:46:53.730 Steve Marchetti: Yes, um it Would you mind terribly if I went back just quick to you're talking about.
00:46:54.570 --> 00:46:56.040 Albert Dabah: Absolutely go right ahead.
00:46:56.220 --> 00:47:04.410 Steve Marchetti: It came to me in the break that the experience with learning about prayer when I was in the hospital led to.
00:47:05.970 --> 00:47:06.960 Steve Marchetti: Such incredible.
00:47:08.490 --> 00:47:14.700 Steve Marchetti: conversations about such things as what is enough, and how do you know when you have it.
00:47:15.780 --> 00:47:24.210 Steve Marchetti: So I was asking for total relief well the universe or God, if you will, whatever your belief system tells you.
00:47:25.560 --> 00:47:29.790 Steve Marchetti: I didn't need that I didn't need for it to go away, I just needed.
00:47:31.800 --> 00:47:39.090 Steve Marchetti: It to be manageable and whether manageable means by degree or quantity, who knows, but.
00:47:40.470 --> 00:47:48.240 Steve Marchetti: I had to express it that way, before I got what I need and that was an incredible lesson what is enough, and how do you know, in your head.
00:47:50.580 --> 00:47:51.060 Steve Marchetti: So.
00:47:52.740 --> 00:47:53.490 Steve Marchetti: As you go.
00:47:55.110 --> 00:47:57.570 Steve Marchetti: forward to today and talk about.
00:47:58.950 --> 00:48:02.550 Steve Marchetti: The work I do with at Seton Hall, and at rutgers.
00:48:04.320 --> 00:48:05.070 Steve Marchetti: it's called.
00:48:06.480 --> 00:48:09.480 Steve Marchetti: word I am is called a standardized patient.
00:48:10.590 --> 00:48:18.540 Steve Marchetti: work that is in the education of medical professionals from doctors MDS.
00:48:20.310 --> 00:48:25.980 Steve Marchetti: Two physical therapists occupational therapists speech and language pathologist nurses.
00:48:27.480 --> 00:48:33.660 Steve Marchetti: physician assistants at Seton hall and records they use role playing.
00:48:34.680 --> 00:48:49.620 Steve Marchetti: To help in the education of these medical professionals by that I mean we the standardized patients are given a case it's not a script really.
00:48:51.150 --> 00:49:01.170 Steve Marchetti: it's a case describes the patient what their complaint is what their ailment is what their injury disease is what it is they're trying to recover from.
00:49:01.650 --> 00:49:10.200 Steve Marchetti: something about their personal and medical history, and then we play that role in a clinical setting.
00:49:10.950 --> 00:49:31.290 Steve Marchetti: Where the student knows that we are standardized patients but they don't know us personally and they don't know very much the only know a little bit a selective amount about the case and in interacting with us as live as as real patients.
00:49:32.730 --> 00:49:38.460 Steve Marchetti: They get to practice taking histories doing examinations.
00:49:39.690 --> 00:49:43.830 Steve Marchetti: And then, at the end of a particular encounter we give them feedback.
00:49:44.850 --> 00:49:46.140 Albert Dabah: surveying the patient.
00:49:46.170 --> 00:49:46.860 Albert Dabah: In other words.
00:49:47.040 --> 00:49:47.520 Steve Marchetti: For me.
00:49:47.700 --> 00:49:49.080 Albert Dabah: you're playing the patient.
00:49:49.230 --> 00:49:55.050 Steve Marchetti: We are, yes, we are playing the patient of most recent one, I had.
00:49:56.190 --> 00:49:57.120 Steve Marchetti: Low back pain.
00:49:58.410 --> 00:49:59.130 Steve Marchetti: and
00:50:01.680 --> 00:50:02.820 Steve Marchetti: There were certain other.
00:50:06.240 --> 00:50:24.810 Steve Marchetti: features about my my lifestyle about my age about my diet and all that all were clues to the student to come up with some kind of an explanation as to why I might have this little baggie and.
00:50:27.060 --> 00:50:30.570 Steve Marchetti: Sometimes the encounters or instructional.
00:50:31.590 --> 00:50:35.280 Steve Marchetti: And sometimes there for testing purposes.
00:50:36.720 --> 00:50:37.200 Steve Marchetti: So.
00:50:39.870 --> 00:50:52.170 Steve Marchetti: Maybe I hope you can imagine that when students, without the without the benefit of a standardized patient or the role playing, they would practice on each other.
00:50:53.280 --> 00:50:59.550 Steve Marchetti: or use family members, and of course they're using people they already know.
00:51:00.750 --> 00:51:06.660 Steve Marchetti: And the seriousness of the interaction is lost.
00:51:07.920 --> 00:51:26.160 Steve Marchetti: Whereas when they're interacting with one of us, we don't play and we don't break role and we don't take a break and go, have you know, have a coke or we don't dissolve into the giggles if somebody says something funny.
00:51:27.630 --> 00:51:30.090 Steve Marchetti: it's all dead serious and.
00:51:31.920 --> 00:51:39.240 Steve Marchetti: I I understand from feedback that we get from from the universities that the.
00:51:40.950 --> 00:51:45.120 Steve Marchetti: The level of preparation and experience that these young people have.
00:51:46.950 --> 00:51:47.640 Steve Marchetti: After.
00:51:49.470 --> 00:51:51.660 Steve Marchetti: interacting with standardized patients.
00:51:53.010 --> 00:52:00.750 Steve Marchetti: As against having no such role playing experience is is tremendous.
00:52:01.170 --> 00:52:03.090 Albert Dabah: Is that something you're still doing now.
00:52:03.390 --> 00:52:04.650 Steve Marchetti: I am yeah yeah.
00:52:05.850 --> 00:52:08.430 Steve Marchetti: yeah we finished up the beginning of May.
00:52:09.960 --> 00:52:16.740 Steve Marchetti: And we'll pick up with a new the way I understand it, in July, there will be incoming.
00:52:18.270 --> 00:52:29.040 Steve Marchetti: class of of students and will begin working with them, as you know, fresh fish fishing is what you call.
00:52:29.070 --> 00:52:40.680 Albert Dabah: God yeah you know it sounds to me like you've had a lot of experiences in your life and obviously going through the period where you were drinking.
00:52:41.700 --> 00:52:45.750 Albert Dabah: A lot and then going through recovery had to be a difficult period I imagine.
00:52:47.250 --> 00:52:54.780 Albert Dabah: Just from knowing different people that i've been in countered with, and in my own family, seeing.
00:52:56.760 --> 00:53:04.500 Albert Dabah: People that my brother and sister that were unhappy and having depression, not at not not having an addiction, but having a.
00:53:05.730 --> 00:53:19.770 Albert Dabah: Mental illness problem can be really tough to get through and i'm really glad to see that you, you know you are who you are today, and you go out and help people.
00:53:20.940 --> 00:53:31.320 Albert Dabah: With your with the groups and with this standardized patient stuff that you're doing now, and I am one of the reasons why I wanted you to be on the show was.
00:53:32.130 --> 00:53:40.680 Albert Dabah: Having someone that has been able to go through some rough times and get through it, because I think that it's a great learning experience for people.
00:53:40.980 --> 00:53:57.420 Albert Dabah: And the critical thinking groups is really I said to me sounds like a wonderful thing, I remember when I was in college, I always love philosophy groups that are not groups classes, I should just say but talking about different things and ideas I went to I grew up.
00:53:58.440 --> 00:54:09.360 Albert Dabah: As an Orthodox Jew and learn Talmud and it was very intense and a lot of it was philosophy and different ways of life and how to look at things from all different angles.
00:54:09.780 --> 00:54:19.860 Albert Dabah: And you know, basically, it was all these discussions that were taught to us on how to look at life this way in that way in all different ways.
00:54:20.280 --> 00:54:32.400 Albert Dabah: And I think it gives you a sense of there's not one right answer, there is, you know, life is is is a big bowl and we pick what we want, but I really love what you said about.
00:54:33.120 --> 00:54:50.250 Albert Dabah: That you realize about how you can maintain what you can maintain in your life what what was something that you knew you couldn't totally say okay i'm going to get all that you know, but that you were able to get to a level in your life that.
00:54:51.720 --> 00:54:59.490 Albert Dabah: That you can control that you had some control of that would still be uncertainty, there would still be some fear, but that you wouldn't be able to have.
00:55:00.570 --> 00:55:09.000 Albert Dabah: A sense of maintenance and I think that's something that's real important is to be able to get up in the morning and know that.
00:55:10.110 --> 00:55:16.410 Albert Dabah: You you, you know where your handles are you know where your limits are.
00:55:17.970 --> 00:55:20.730 Albert Dabah: And I think that's a really great part of.
00:55:21.870 --> 00:55:24.120 Albert Dabah: Mental wellness let's put it that way.
00:55:25.200 --> 00:55:32.250 Albert Dabah: So um we're coming to the end of our show and i'd like to just wrap it up and again, thank you for being here tonight.
00:55:33.780 --> 00:55:48.750 Albert Dabah: Is last minute I would just like to say that the movie that I made extra innings really takes place in the 1960s and I made it to help people see that there is hope in life.
00:55:50.370 --> 00:55:55.350 Albert Dabah: No matter what goes on around us, even on our deepest moments.
00:55:56.040 --> 00:56:06.000 Albert Dabah: there's help out there for people, whether it's reaching out to a friend to therapists and if a therapist doesn't work for you try another therapists there are people to call.
00:56:06.780 --> 00:56:20.070 Albert Dabah: There are all kinds of groups out there and I call the film extra innings because i'm a you know huge baseball fan, and for me extra innings is.
00:56:21.180 --> 00:56:28.230 Albert Dabah: Like there's hope life goes on there's a phrase, I put out life goes on past the bottom of the ninth so.
00:56:29.790 --> 00:56:39.780 Albert Dabah: I think that it, for me it says that we we don't have to give up, we, we need to thrive on and.
00:56:40.500 --> 00:56:58.950 Albert Dabah: You know, always look for answers whenever the answers are and listen, I think that one of the key things you said about the group was listening it's so important, so I was glad to listen to you tonight and hear what you had to say and be well and maybe one day we'll meet up in montclair.
00:57:00.240 --> 00:57:03.090 Steve Marchetti: I will look forward to that, thank you very much for this opportunity.
00:57:03.540 --> 00:57:09.600 Albert Dabah: yeah for sure, thank you alright have a great have a great night and be well see you all next week.
00:57:09.660 --> 00:57:11.220 Steve Marchetti: bye bye bye bye.
00:57:11.250 --> 00:57:12.570 Albert Dabah: Thank you have a good evening.